I suck at Blogging, but I can bite!

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Not Gonna Happen...it's the LAST SHOW! Go watch it yourself!

2010-05-23T17:38:00.000-07:00

No blogging. Will enjoy my favorites show's demise with my double chocolate ice-cream and maybe some wine. Enjoy everyone. Lost will always be my life. The end

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Hyperventilation and Excitement, No Picture Necessary

2010-05-18T19:10:00.000-07:00

***LIVE LOST BLOGGING of Episode aired 5/18/2010***

Previously.......starts us off and we re-cap the crap ass killer episode.
Beginning with Jack's eye again and we are off island in sideways time line and Jack has his neck cut. His son is there at his apartment. They are having a great morning. It's sweet. "Don't get weird."
YEAH Clare is there with them for Breakfast. Phone Call: Oceanic airlines has located the cargo --> Jack's Dad in the coffin, except that the phone call is actually the evil Desmond trickster.

ISLAND - Morning on island. Jack is treating Kate from the gun shop. He stitches her up just as she had done so long ago. Kate is reminiscing about Sun and Jin and concludes that FAUCKE MUST DIE.

A life jacket appears on the beach on the Island. Hugo stands near Sawyer and Kate. The are all forlorn. Jack joins the,. Three left and another wreck brought them back to the island. Jack informs about Desmond's existence in a well. They are heading to look for Des.

OFF ISLAND - Locke is at school rolling through the parking lot. Ben sees Des and starts screaming. He starts punching Ben so Ben will remember Des on the island. Ben does have a flash of island memory.

Finally see Ben and Miles with Guyliner walking through the jungle. I love Miles awesome one liners. Ben hid C4 in his secret room behind the bookcase. Miles is hearing dead people. He said Wonky. Awwww Miles is hearing Ben's daughter who has been burried. Ben is sad. He walks to his house to look for the C4. Ben explains to Miles how he could summon the monster via the secreter room, in his secret room. Ben opens the safe and gets all the C4 to blow the plane to hell. They run into Whidmore and Zoe at his house in New Otherton in the kitchen. How did they not run into each other before.
So is this before last week, before Faucke leads them to the plane and then teh sub and he takes the C4 and puts it in Jack's pack back?

STILL ISLAND - in Kitchen. Ben is not trusting Whidmore. He warns of their last chance of survivor. Oh good. This is now, not before last week. Jacob had visited WHidmore to get him back on the island. Zoe warns of Faucke.

OFF ISLAND - Nurse is working on Ben at school. Locke questions Ben about the fighting and stuff. Ben says he thinks he may have saw something. The man, Desmond, was trying to get Locke to let go. Desmond now has shown up at the police station where Miles and Sawyer work. Miles is getting ready to go to an event. Des goes and confesses to being the suspect in both instances of attacks at the school. He runs into Sayid and Kate who are also in the jail.

ISLAND - Going to look for the well. Sawyer questions Faucke's want to kill Desmond. They talk about the bomb blowing up. Sawyer knows he should have trusted Jack. Hugo stops along their walk, because he sees something strange. He runs into the kid that has been hanging out around the island. The kid wanted Ilana's ashes, because they were his and he is lil Jacob, yes? And it turns out that the kid is Jacob....I think. Oh no, when the ashes burn out, they will never see Jacob again.
"You should get your friends, we're very near to the end Hugo." says Jacob.

Fsaucke steps back on the planks on the Island. Zoe make sit back to cabin. There is lots of fast stuff. Ben asks for the walky talkies. Zoe and Whidmore are off. Miles goes too. Guyliner wants to talk to Faucke to get him to leave them alone. "Good Luck with that." So smokey carries Guyliner away. Ben just hangs out on the front porch awaiting Faucke. Faucke says its just the man he was looking for and take out his knife. Faucke says that he needs Ben to kill people for him. He will give Ben the island all to himself. Faucke asks about the rigger. Ben confesses it is Whidmore and tells Faucke where to find him.

OFF ISLAND - Ben runs into his fav student, Alex. She offers him a way home. Ohhh, Alex's man is crazy Danielle, from the island. AWESOME! Love seeing her again. Co que vin night? Danielle is happy to have Ben there with her. Danielle explains that Alex's father died and that Ben was like a father to Alex. So sweet. He is tearing up.

ISLAND - Ben lets Faucke in to explore his closet containing Whidmore and Zoe. She is armed Ben warns. Ben wants to see Faucke attack Whidmore. Ben lead Faucke right to them. Faucke kills Zoe immediately. Faucke wants to know something from Whidmore. He asks Whid to whisper it is his ear. Why is Faucke threatening to kill Penny? Faucke wants to know why Whidmore came back. He explains it was Desmond and his resistance to electromagnetism. Don't whisper Whidmore! Whidmore does whisper something to Faucke so Ben can't hear. Now, Ben shot Whidmore! Ben says that Whidmore doesn't get to see his daughter. Faucke is impressed by Ben's willingness to kill.

Kate, Sawyer, Jack and Hugo get to speak with Hugo now. They can all see Jacob now. Kate is angry with Jacob. She wants to know that Sun, Jin and Sayid didn't die for nothing. Jacob is now going to explain why they died. Jacob is going to tell everything now. One of them gets island duty after he tells them everything about the island. Of course like Seacrest, we go to commercial, before we learn anything.

OFF ISLAND - Locke goes to see Jack in the hospital. They talk of Jack's son picture. Locke explains how he threw away Jack's card and how strange it is that they keep running into one another. Then Locke says that Desmond says he was there to help Locke let go. Freaky deaky. Locke admits that this is happening for a reason. They have a Fate conversation and Locke says he is ready to try and get out of the chair.

ISLAND - The 4 plus Jacob are together at the fire. Jacob begins his story.... Jacob says he made the monster and the monster was trying to kill him. Sawyer is pissed at Jacob for messing with his life. Jacob says he didn't pluck any of them out of a happy existence. They were all flawed and alone. Something they couldn't find. Kate was crossed off because she became a mother. But she can have it. The light at the center of the island must never go out and must be protected from him, smokey, the man in black, Faucke, etc. Jacob wants them to kill the monster. They hope it is possible. Jacob is giving them a choice to determine who shall stay and protect. Jack says that he should do it. It is why he is there. Jack wants to be it. And it is TIME.

Now they are just staring off into space. Sawyer makes a joke about Jack having a God Complex. The bamboo field where Jack landed, the light was nearby. Jack was confused. Jacob gives a cup of the water he has blessed. Jack asks how long will he have to do the job. "As long as you can" says Jacob. Jacob says to Jack, "now you're like me."

OFF ISLAND - Sawyer says that they are shipping all the prisoners to County Jail. Sawyer and Kate have a moment between the bars. "Nice knowing ya" Sawyer says. The three prisoner are in the back of the police transport vehicle. Sayid tells Kate that Des is crazy. Des has a plan to get them out of there. They have to do what he asks them to do and promise they will. They said, ok. Hey, Anna Shows up! She lets them all out at the dock. And it's Hugo giving Anna the money. Cause they never met. Hugo is taking them somewhere. Desmond is taking Kate to a concert, to get Jack?

ISLAND - Ben is walking with Faucke. Faucke explains he likes to walk cause it reminds him that he was human. Faucke is looking for Desmond and sees Des has escaped with a rope. Faucke says that someone helped Faucke out by allowing Desmond to escape the well. Now Faucke says that Desmond will help him destroy the island. Desmond is a fail safe....okay?

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - UM WOW, which is different from SHAM WOW!

2010-05-11T19:05:00.000-07:00

*****SPOILER POST - LOST LIVE BLOGGING to Episode from 5/11/10*******

Floating boat parts and baskets..... And there is WHO? Who is that? When are we? I know where we are? Is this the birth of the brothers, Jacob and Man in Black? Yes, yes it is!
The stream, seen so many times....Wait am I watching the Island on LOST or the West Wing or a Kaiser Permante, au-natural commercial? Oh it's Claudia who landed on the island pregnant and is found by the West Wing's Allison Janney. Claudia and Allison Janney are in the cave, where Jack found Adam & Eve, way back in the 1st Season. How nice. Now they speak English. (THANK GOODNESS)

Uh oh. Baby, coming?
Yup, baby birthing....the yugo way. Push push push. That is NOT a new born baby... but whatever. Jacob is there, born now. Lovely. Now here, comes the "other baby". Mom says she only picked one name. He is no name baby and in a black blanket, while Jacob wears Black. Then the President's future Chief of Staff punched out Jacob's Mom.

Younger Man in Black maybe, find a black box that he can play a rock game. Jacob goes to play the rock game with Man in Black, but they can't tell mother about it. So the Press Secretary is still alive, weaving. Jacob lies about what the teenaged Man in Black and him where doing with the game. This is very biblical. There is a giant sea turtle. I like jim. Mom goes to talk to the younger Man in Black (MIB). Jacob told his mom about the game. Their Mom tell MIB that he is "special". The game came from their Mom and she informs that the island is all there is. Awww MIB doesn't know what dead is.

They're both chasing the boar! Why do they always have to wear black and white. The boys come upon other hunters on teh island who look like babrians a bit. They hide from them, then run back to tell their mother of the barbarian men. The Mom is worried about the people. They are there for a reason. The Mom will not explain the reason yet. It is not time yet. She says come with me and blindfolds them. She leads them somewhere blindfolded. The Mom says she has made it so that they can never hurt each other. She leads to some glowing part of the stream that is like a cave. Mom says don't go in there and it is light, the warmest and brightest ever. MIB finds it beautiful. Every man wants the light. The men will try to take it. The light cannot go out. Mom says one of the two brothers will have to protect the place. She just says, "It will have to be one of you."

MIB and Jacob playing their game. MIB made up the rules. MIB sees Claudia standing there and she says to not be afraid. MIB runs off to find the woman (his Mom). Jacob can't see her, because she is dead. She wants to show MIB where he came from....a place he's never seen. She leads him to the encampment place. The people came their 14 years ago. Ther were in the ship wreck. Claudia informs that they came from across the see and that she, the dead ghost is his mother. MIB seems pissed. He sneaks off to Jacob who is sleeping in the cave. The go tromping through the woods with a lighted torch. MIB says that there mother is lying and that he is going to the people. Jacob begins punching and yelling at MIB for going to the other people. MIB tells Allison Janney that they don't belong there, and that she killed their mother. Jacob says that he will not go with them. MIB is told he is never able to leave the island. He says it is not true and one day he will prove it. He runs off.

Mom-Janney is watching the ocean and does not think MIB will come back. She admits she killed their mother and that she needed Jacob to stay good and that is why she killed her.Jacob asks why do you love other brother more? She says that she loves the brothers in different ways. She begs Jacob to stay with her and he agrees.

Jacob is the one we now know, he is weaving. Mom-Janney is getting old. She is tired. Jacob is looking after MIB (wonder what he told the people his name is). The two brothers are playing their game. MIB asks why Jacob why he watches. Jacob wants to know if Mom is right about the people and whether they are bad. MIB says that they are indeed all bad. They are selfish, greedy, etc. MIB thinks they are a means to an end, so that he can get off the island. Jacob believes that is impossible to get off the island. MIB throws a knife and it sticks to the well, and it sticks. The magnetism is strange and the people living with him have found something. Jacob doesn't want to leave the island because it is his home.

Jacob returns to his Mom and explains that MIB may have found a way to leave the island. Mom goes looking for MIB. She stares off at him then follows him down a tunnel of what looks like the Temple where he is heating coals in a fire. She always asks him, if she may join him when she comes upon him. MIB has been searching everywhere for the light that his Mom showed him and Jacob before when they were younger. They argue, because MIB wants to know what the island is and Mom will not tell him. But MIB has found the glowing place some way else, behind the rock, hand-made wall. MIB is making a wheel to channel the water and the light. The same wheel at the end of the season before last of LOST. Mom begs for MIB not to go. He says he doesn't belong there. Mom says that she supposes this is good bye and looks teary eyed at MIB. They hug. Mom says she is so sorry, then kills MIB by banging his head against the rock wall. WOW!

Jacob is awoken by his Mom in the cave. She says its time. They go tromping through the woods. The go to the stream, toward where the light is. He asks what's down there. Mom says it is the heart of the island. Jacob must promise that he will not ever go down into the light. She pours Jacob some wine. When he drinks the wine it means that you have accepted to protect the island. Jacob complains that she has wanted MIB to be the one to drink. Mom says it was always supposed to be him, Jacob though. She begs him to take the cup and drink again. He does. Now she and Jacob are the same, so she says.

See MIB laying in the grass with a bloody back. The well has been destroyed. Black smoke is scene and the people in the hutches are burned and dead. The camp is afire. MIB finds his game. He is distraught and then turns angry faced.

Mom has changed her tunic to white? Maybe, I can't remember. Mom sends Jacob to get firewood before it rains. He says I'll see you back home. When she returns to teh cave there is already a fire and the woven blanket is destroyed. SHe finds MIB's game and the two stones. She is killed with a spear by MIB. He looks sad and asks why she wouldn't let him leave. SHe says because she loved him then says thank you and dies. He has tears. Jacob comes upon them. He attacks MIB and begins punching him. He then drags MIB to the cave of light. He knocks MIB out and sends him down the stram to leave. The light goes out and then out comes the smoke monster. Uh oh. Scary! Jacob is confuzzled. He washes his face. He then sees his brother laying on a rock dead, stuck in a tree. He cries and hugs his dead brother. Jacob brings his brother back to their cave. He buries his Mom and MIB with the black and white rocks.

FLASHBACK to the rocks being found by Jack and Kate, and their discovery of "Adam and Eve".

Jacob says "Good-bye Brother." Then we fade out to some Doors.....

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - With All That, I Need Some Candy. Apollo Bar anyone?

2010-05-04T19:32:00.000-07:00

****LOST SPOILERS - LIVE Blogging to Episode on 5/4/2010.******

Begin OFF Island in the hospital as Jack wakes up Locke. Locke is disoriented as he is awaking from Jack's surgery. Jack questions Locke about treating his spine. He calls Locke "A Candidate" for a new procedure they are working on. "I can fix you" says Jack. Yeah, Peggy Bundy is here and tears and hugs and love.
Peggy hugs, Jack and says thanks for saying him.

ISLAND - Lack awakes in a boat. Jack is on Hydra Island, so says Sayid. We now see Sawyer's group with Kate, Hurley and Sun/Jin group at Hydra, at the cages. Sawyer pulls a gun, Whidmore threatens to kill Kate because she is not on the "list". Then, Whidmore talks to his peeps and requests that they hurry, because, "He's coming..." He must be Faucke of course.

OFF ISLAND - YES it's Bernard. I love him. His last name is Nadler. Jack wants to get a patient file for John Locke. He is looking for emergency surgery details on Locke. Yup. Jack, Benard was on the same flight. That's right! Old Ben asks, why Jack is so interested in Locke? Apperently Locke was in an accident with his Dad, Anthony Cooper. Car accident??

ISLAND - Jack is getting out of the boat. Sayid explains that there was a mortar attack. The group has scattered into the jungle. Faucke tells Jack that they have to rescue Jack's old boat group. Faucke is trying to rally them together...before Whidmore knows what hit him. Jack says he is NOT leaving the island. Faucke reminds that Jack's friends do want to leave and he hopes Jack will leave too. Faucke says he needs Jack's help to convince the others that they should follow him. Faucke points out that he could have killed Jack, before and right now.

Kate & Sawyer are in the cage on Hydra Island, this time the same cage together. Sawyer informs that Kate's name was crossed out on the list of names on the cave wall. Sun and Jin discuss their daughter. Awwwww. Smiles, tears, ring exchanges, kisses. Lovely. So it looks like the grid just went down that encircles them around the main building area on Hydra. And here comes smokey! People are firing at smoke, that seems smart. Really? Kate stretches out to reach the keys off a dead Whidmorian, and Jack suddenly appears and lets them all out. He announces, "I'm with him." Him being Faucke of course.

ISLAND - Jack and all walking through the island. Jack says he will take them to the plane but he is not getting on it. Sawyer thanks, Jack. Sayid is with the, says Jack. Faucke is waiting.

OFF Island - Jack is at an office looking for Anthony Cooper. He runs into Peggy. Jack is investigating into the accident that hurt Locke's back. Jack says saving Locke's life is not enough. Peggy leads Jack into the dining area of an old folks home. We see, Locke's father drooling and staring into space. Peggs explains that Mr. Cooper is John's father.

ISLAND - The people guarding the plane, who are Whidmore's shoot at Faucke, while he is in Faucke form, not smoke. However, they still die. He of course is fine. Faucke takes a watch off one of the dead guards. He is now on the plane looking at wires in the ceiling. Is is a bomb? We can't see what he is doing....

Lapidus, Sawyer, Jack and company approach the plane. Lapidus is going to investigate the plane. They see the dead men laying on the ground. Faucke admits that he killed Whidmore's people who were guarding the plane. Faucke said that Whidmore wanted to kill all the losties, Sawyer, Sayid, et. al., by blowing them up. Perhaps Faucke was disarming the bomb on the plane. Faucke is worried that the plane is not safe now. Faucke says that they should use the submarine instead. Everyone agrees. Jack will help get them to the sub, but Jack is not leaving again he says. Faucke says, "Fair enough". Clare apologizes to Faucke. Sawyer says to Jack that he doesn't trust Faucke. He wants to make sure that Faucke doesn't get on the sub. Sawyer says to Jack he will take care of it.

OFF Island - Locke awaking again in the hospital. He talks of pushing the button in his half dazed awakeness. Locke says that he "wishes that you would have believed me."
Clare shows up, and Jack goes to the hallway candy machine and buys his Apollo bar from the machine and he gets it this time. Clare shows Jack a music box that their father wanted her to definitely have. Apparently their father drank himself to death. Clare and Jack find that they were also on the same flight 815 from Sydney. Weird!! They look at the music box together. Of course it sings, "Catch a Falling Star". Jack doesn't know why their father wanted Clare to have the box. Jack offers that Clare come stay with him, because they are family after all.

ISLAND - Everyone is crouching in the grass near the sub dock. Gosh, they got their uber fast, no tromping through the jungle scene. Sawyer says they are going in HARD (twss). Sawyer makes the plan. Sawyer gives Jack the wink wink about Faucke and him not trusting him. Faucke smirks. Uh oh. They approach the sub in two teams. No one seems to be there at the dock. Sawyer opens the sub's hatch and sneaks in with Lapidus. They have guns and are creeping up on a worker in there. They ask for the Captain, but they knock the captain out when they find him. Apparently, Lapidus is not only an ultimate helicopter and plane pilot, he can also drive submarines! They get ready to start the sub. Jack puts on his backpack in the grass and runs towards the sub with Clare, Faucke and Kate maybe. Jack pushes Faucke into the water as he told Sawyer he would. There is some kind of other commotion and Kate is shot. NOOOO!!

Now there is a shoot out. They put Kate into the sub. Faucke is climbing out of the water on the dock and firing at the people firing at him. Kate is in pain. Jack enters the sub with Kate and looks for a First aide kit. Clare is still out there. Sawyer calls for Clare and tries to get her to the sub's hatch with covering fire, but as he sees Faucke, he decides to instead close the hatch, because he does not want Faucke to come with them. Oh no! Faucke tells Clare, trust me you don't want to be on that sub. Well CRAP!
Kate asks where Clare is and says that they can't leave her. They are looking in Jack's backpack for something to stop her bleeding and they find in Jacks pack, the bomb....it is ticking. Jack, "We did exactly what he wanted."

STILL Island - Jack says that they have to get to the surface NOW! They watch the timer tick down. Commotion, craziness, Sayid investigates the bomb. Jack suddenly recalls the dynamite and Guyliner and tells them all that nothing is going to happen and that Faucke can't kill them. Faucke is not allowed to kill them. Jack says that it is a Fuacke trick and he wants them all to kill one another instead because he can't kill them. Sawyer says he doesn't trust Jack's logic and pulls a wire on the bomb. The timer stops and then the count down goes faster. Sayid informs that he didn't kill Desmond and tells Jack where to find him, then he runs off with the bomb. It explodes and Sayid is gone. Sad.

They are now all sinking, in the sinking sub. Uh oh. Water water everywhere. Kate is passed out from the gun shot. Sun is trapped under something heavy. There just has to be another crises doesn't there...other than the water. Sawyer goes to help get Sun free and Jack too. Hurley leaves with Kate, after Jack convinces him to go. The sub continues to sink. Water water water. They are moving the medal thing from Sun. They succeed and then the sub rocks and Sawyer is struck in the head. Something else of course. Now Sayer is passed out too. As it turns out, Sun is still trapped behind a pipe or something and can't get free. Sun begs for Jin to go and save himself. Jin wants Jack to save Sawyer and convinces Jack to go. Jin is staying with Sun... this is crappy. Stupid Faucke.
So Jack is saving Sawyer, Sun and Jin remain in the sub, trying to get Sun free, and Sun continues to beg Jin to go. Jin tries to free her over and over. Jin says he won't leave her ever again. Tears, sad.
Now they are dead and we see their arms stretched out and their hands lose grip.

OFF Island - Locke is leaving the hospital. The orderly asks who is picking him up. He says his fiance, Helen, aka Peggy is picking him up. Jack informs Locke that he went to see his father. Locke tells Jack the story of how he became a paraplegic in this timeline. Locke was in a plane crash with his father, where he was flying. Locke had told his father to trust him while flying and now he blames himself that his father is now injured. Jack tells Locke that his father is essentially gone, and "What happened, happened", and you can let it go. Jack says he can't let it go himself either. Jack says that he was hoping that Locke could let it go first. Locke just rolls off down the hall and says goodbye. Jack yells at Locke, that he can help him and he wished Locke would believe him. Locke stops for a moment, but still goes.

ISLAND - they arrive back on the beach out of breath. Thankfully Sawyer survived the writer's massacre in the sub. And Kate too. Jack informs that Jin and Sun both drowned. Hurley cries. Jack walks back to the ocean to cry alone looking at the moon.

Locke, sees that the sub sunk. Clare is concerned that the sub sank with everyone on it. Faucke says not all of them are dead. Clare asks where Faucke is heading off to, which Faucke responds, "To finish what I've started."

QUESTIONS/THOUGHTS
- Can you make your own decision about leaving the island? Jack doesn't want to, can Faucke force him to? He apparently needs him to leave...hmmm??
- Now I thought Faucke couldn't kill them. How is it that Jin and Sun died.....oh I guess, Sayid with the bomb and an accident of her getting trapped killed her. Jin decided to kill himself.
- How many times did I write "Apparently" in this post? I still LOVE the show, but I think I am extra bitter this episode because 3 people died in one mother flipping show. UGHH!
- So who do you think are the two in the cave that Jack comes upon in Season One in the cave near the fresh water? Kate + Sawyer, or Kate + Jack.
- Is this show really going to be about the Kate/Jack/Sawyer triangle, I hope not. I have faith!

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Drinking the Locke Kool-aid, Ain't Good

2010-04-20T19:16:00.000-07:00

*****SPOLIER POST - Contains LOST Live Blogging from 4/20/2010 Episode*****

Showing of last week’s LOST and again I feel as though I need to say WTF, Desmond? Hitting a man in a wheel chair, I mean really.

Oh no, it’s the Jack/ Faucke show down. I am worried. The whole gang is here. It makes me feel sick, RUN Jack, RUN AWAY! Nooo. Faucke is Yucko! They are sitting in the forest and talking….Only Jack has a gun. Jack, asks “Why John Locke?”Apparently, Faucke needed a dead body to appear. Jack asks if Faucke was Jack’s father before, and of course, YES! Thanks for asking Jack. 1 Question down. Faucke lead them to water. Faucke has always wanted to help them leave, but they were trapped on the island because Jacob chose him. To fly away it has to be all of them, as we have learned. Oh noes, Faucke is calling John Locke a sucker. That is LAME.

OFF ISLAND – In the Ambulane with Locke and Ben. Locke wants to find Helen, aka, Peg Bundy, and tells them his name. Oh Locke and Sun come in on the same Ambulance. Looks like Sun is recognizing him.

ISLAND - Faucke walks Jack out to the Clare. Ohh it’s a Brother sister reunion between Crazy Clare and Jack. Very very lovely, please bring me tears. Clare gave up hoping that they would come back to the island and she is really glad that Jack has decided to be on Faucke’s team. Crazy Clare repeats the rule that, the second you hear Faucke talk, you are with him, just as it’s been warned before in other shows. Jack is confuzzled.

Hurley and Sawyer. Nice. Sayid is from the Dark Side now. But you can bring people back from the Dark Side so Hurley reminds us. Star Wars, duh. How did it become daytime, so suddenly.

OFF ISLAND – Sawyer and Kate at the police station after he had caught her downtown several shows ago. There’s some back and forth and sexual tension. It’s adorable. And Sawyer points out the obvious weirdness that the world is trying to put them together. Why didn’t you arrest Kate in the elevator at LAX? Kate figured it out, it was because Sawyer was trying to hide he was there.
Miles pulls over Sawyer over to discuss the shooting involving Sayid, Sun, Jin, Keamy and company.

ISLAND - Kate says that Sayid is different now. Faucke wants to leave and they all have to go together, so they repeat again. Oh here comes Zoe. Zoe wants Desmond back, but says that, “they have something of theirs [Whidmore’s]”. Why do they keep referring to Desmond, like a thing? And Zoe displays Whidmore’s mad rocket skills, as a rocket lands and explodes right nearby where she stands to confront Faucke. She gives Faucke a walkie-talkies. He smashes it and says, “Here we go!”

OFF ISLAND – Non crazy Clare at the adoption agency building in LA. So Desmond goes up and starts talking to her randomly. He is now following her…this is odd. What the eff? Des, you are crazy. Desmond is telling her she needs a lawyer to go to the adoption agency. This is a little crazy. The lawyer that he is going to see is def Mike’s ex wife. I bet cha. So Clare somehow listens to Desmond. Oh I am wrong it is Ilana. Since when is she a lawyer? Since now, I guess. Apparently Ilana has been looking for Clare and asks to speak to her for a moment, sans off-island, crazy Desmond.

ISLAND – Clare goes up to Hurley, “What’s going on?” Hurley – “People trying to kill us again.” Faucke is trying to lead everyone to the other island. He has this whole separation plan. It seems a bit suspect and Sawyer doesn’t seem to believe in Faucke. Sawyer has a “deal” with Whidmore, as he tells Jack. Sayid and Clare are nuts. So Jack, per Sawyer is supposed to get away from Faucke…okay. Faucke orders Sayid to go kill Desmond and to do what he, Faucke says. And so Sayid walks off….

Sayid with a gun, walking toward Desmond in the well. Des questions what Faucke offered Sayid. Of course it was his darling wife, Nadia back from the dead. Desmond is questioning Faucke’s power to Sayid. Desmond asks him, “What will you tell her when she asks what you did to be able to be with her again?”

OFF ISLAND – Sayid is back at Nadia’s house and is packing back up his suitcase, swiftly. He says that everything is going to be okay. He tells Nadia that he is leaving and can never come back again. The doorbell rings, it’s Miles from the LAPD. Miles says he needs to ask questions…..Sawyer catches Sayid in the back yard.

ISLAND – Desmond’s boat, or someone else’s’? Who’s is this? Sawyer says that they are going to ditch Faucke with the pilot that looks like he stepped out of a Charlton Heston Movie. Ha! “Clare ain’t coming”, says Sawyer. Clare has been, “Drinking the Locke Kool-aid!” Ha! Kate is mad because she swore she would bring Clare back. They swim out to the sailboat. Where was this boat before?

With Faucke in lead, there’s more tromping through the woods. Jack talks with Clare and asks how long she has been with Faucke. She says she trusts him and that “he was the only one that didn’t abandon her”.

Faucke is looking for Sayid, he questions Sun. She is mad because she believes he took away her English and of course, Faucke tells Sun he didn’t. Faucke is going to make sure that no one got left behind, so he says. Jack separates “his crew” to follow with him, to go and meet Sawyer. Clare watches them all run away. Faucke asks Sayid where he has been. Sayid said he shot Desmond and “Go check if you like.” They go of toward the boat.

Now Jack is running through the woods with his company. Jack is looking for Sawyer and the boat. They see them. They are all trying to get off the idland. But Crazy Clare comes gun toting to ask where they are going. Uh oh… They are leaving the idland says Kate to Clare. He’s not one of us. Kate says that they can get her back to Aaron. She reminds that Clare should have raised him. Please come with us Clare. She lowers the weapon and gives it to Kate. Clare says that Faucke will be mad if he finds out where they are.

OFF ISLAND – Back in the office building or hospital, okay office building…we have Jack and son, both in matching suits. Too cute. Ohh the lawyer was looking for Clare because of Jack’s father’s will. Awww. Ilana asks if they believe in fate? Because she found Clare. Clare tells Jack that they are related. Jack face palms….and his phone rings. It’s the hospital about Locke, I am sure. Jack has to reschedule.

ISLAND – Now they are all chillaxing on the sail boat all calm and peaceful like. Lapidus asks Sawyer what is happening and Sawyer gives the lowdown, about going to meet up with Whidmore. Sawyer goes to talk to Jack. Jack says it doesn’t feel right to leave the island. Jack says he remembers how wrong it felt the last time he left. Sawyer orders Jack off the boat, unless he is with them. Sawyer is done with the island, but Jack disagrees. So how is this Sawyer’s boat? Well, Jack apologizes for Juliet’s death and jumps off the boat. Kate Screams after him! Sawyer, “He changed his mind”. Kate is torn between the 2 men, as always.

OFF ISLAND – Sun opens her eyes in the hospital. Jin is asleep next to her. She calls out to him. She asks what happened. Effing subtitles. Ohh their baby is fine here. It’s over, Jin tells her. Okay… This is sweet but can the meet up on island now, please?
Jack is walking through halls of same hospital with his son, not Sun. His son tells him good luck, as Jack goes into surgery prep. Okay, so Jack is now going to work on Locke in the hospital. Wonder what he’ll say when we he sees him. Jack’s just amazed. He should me SHOCKED!

ISLAND - Jack out of breath back on island, having swam from Sawyer’s boat. He runs into Faucke & company on the island. Uh oh… Faucke is pissed cause Sawyer took his boat. Zoe and her band of brothers meets Sawyer and crew on the beach as the boat lands there. But wait, Oh yes! The Sun/Jin reunion! YES!! Finally. Wonderful. Oh she can speak Engrish now! All Tears and everyone smiles. We’ll never be apart again. Awwww. Sawyer takes a sideways glance at Kate.

Zoe/Whidmore crew suddenly pulls their weapons on Sawyer’s just landed boat crew, as per a walkie talkie order. And one of the awesome Zoe Rockets is fired at Faucke on the other island as he is on the beach. Explosion! Jack tries to warn everyone to move. Jack’s hearing is damaged in the explosion. Faucke takes Jack away and saves him from the beach-splosions. What is happening? Fauck says to Jack, “you’re with me now.”

THOUGHTS

- Does Jack working on Locke off-island mean that Jack can fix Faucke on the island?

- We got confirmation that Faucke was acting as Jack/Clare’s Dad, and probably all the other dead folks, except for those that Hurley can see

- Where did this boat come from? Faucke kept referring to it as his boat.

- Why did Whidmore renege on the deal? Is he the bad one? Where is Ben in this party? Was he with them or is he gone with Guyliner to blow up the plane? Where are they?

- And Desmond, he can’t be dead? Sayid couldn’t have lost his face with Nadia by killing Desmond. He didn’t want Nadia to know what he had done in his sideways timeline, and would not want her to know of his bad deeds in the island timeline, either.

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - We All REALLY Do LOVE Hugo

2010-04-13T19:15:00.000-07:00

*****SPOILER LIVE BLOGGING OF 4/13 Episode of LOST***********

Everybody loves Hugo. This is lovely. YES, Hugo is going to see Charlotte, maybe at the museum, but is currently with Miles' Dad. Hugo is the Man of the Year, ya'll.

OFF ISLAND - Hugo's Mom is pissed that he needs a girl. And she set him up on a date tomorrow with Rosalita.

ISLAND - Hugo places a new flower on Libby's grave. So sad. Now he is talking at her grave. Tears! Ilana interrupts, and tells them they need dynamite. Awwww Hugo tells Ilana about Libby. Sad times. Crap now he's hearing voices, but now he sees Michael, who tells that he is "Here to stop them from getting everyone killed." Alrighty.
Michael warns that people are going to die, if they blow up the place and that Hugo must do right, because people listen to him now. I think it's the man in black, not dead Mike!

OFF ISLAND - Mexican eatin' Hurley. Bet he gets to see Anna Lucia, oh no, it's Libby! Yeeeahhhh it's Libby! Not his blind date. Oh she has a secret to tell him....bet it's about the island. She's going to tell the connection stuff we learned last week with Desmond. Libby is REAL dammit, HUGO! Believe her. Stupid Doctor from Stupid Mental Hospital.

ISLAND - Ilana has the dynamite. They are ready to go across the island to blow up the plane. Now Hugo is second guessing the plan from Ilana. There seems to be a bit of a show down and now Ilana is blown to pieces. Well SHOOT!
Sawyer talking to Faucke. Twiddling thumbs and widling wood. Lovely. And in walks Sayid, sans Desmond. He is bringing Faucke to a tied up Desmond.
Still Island. So Hurly finds his Marbles (he’s no longer crazy, or is crazy again?) and now he wants to follow Richard’s suggestions.

OFF ISLAND – Desmond sees Hurley eating at the Chicken Place! Awesome. Hugo is sooo pissed and bitter. I hate mean Hugo. Maybe we’ll learn if Desmond gets to hook up with Penny in this off island life. Nope he talks to Hurley about his own dispair.
Desmond tells Hurley to go with his gut and to try to see if he does know Libby. How nice.
ISLAND – Faucke talks to Desmond. “He has nowhere to run to, Bruutha.” Questions being asked of Desmond. Electromagnetism blasts, and walks with John Locke. But Desmond, it’s really Faucke!

Why can’t Ben be blown up? I AM SO SICK OF BEN! He has served his purpose. I am done with him. I love how Sun just rolled her eyes at Ben’s nonsense. They arrive at Black Rock. Hurley was missing and now they see Hurley running at them, he pre-blew up the dynamite at Black Rock…..alrighty.
No more Dynamite store available on the island. But at least they are all alive and unhurt. Michael told Hugo something so he did it, so he tells Miles. Again, I love Miles and Hurley talking.

OFF ISLAND – The Doc at the Mental Hospital is the same in all timelines. Hugo is going to bribe the Doc into letting him see Libby. Ohhh the wreck room is the same as when Hugo was there! Same drawings I think. Libby asks if Hurley remembers, and he says “No”. But he still wants to know how Libby thinks she knows him. It is kind of sweet. Libby has crazy memories flowing back of “another life”. Ohhh, she remembers the Plan Crash Life, on the Island. CRAZED! Libby looks old in this flash sideways. Very Touching. Hurley is asking crazy time, Libby, out. Loving this.

ISLAND – Faucke and Desmond are trompsing through the woods again. The strange kid is there again. Weird. Who is he?

Now Richard wants to go to the Barracks to get explosives to blow up the plane. Hurley says that Jacob says they have to instead, go talk to Locke. Guyliner tests Hurley, asking what the island is. There is a Guyliner show down with Hurley and Co. and the band must break up. Ben and Miles go with Guyliner, PS they are NOT on the list. Jack trusts in Hugo and that they should go talk to Locke. Sun just sits. She wants to see hubby. OH NO! Now Hurley is bringing Faucke exactly what he wants. This is not good.

More torch bearing tromping through the woods, entails. I missed what Sun wrote….Heading to see Faucke, heading to see Faucke. Jack tells his sad times, self esteem issues. Jack is supposed to let go. OKAY now, no one knows what to do here. Someone have an answer, someone. Uh ohhh whisper voices. And Hugo no longer freaked by them. He looks around for Michael and calls out for him. Hugo explains the whispers in one fell swoop, and inadvertently explains that the whispers are from stuck souls on the island, who are stuck on island because of what they did. Ohhh, Michael apologizes to Libby kind of, via Hurley.

OFF ISLAND – Hurley gets his date at the beach with Libby. How lovely. Ohh, “A date they never had.” Soooo sweet. Libby serves to build up Hurley’s self esteem and he has island flash backs or sideways, as they kiss. Awesome. Desmond is stalking Hurley now. Too too too strange. Creepster stalking. Why?

ISLAND – Faucke says to Desmond that they are “Here”. Why is it the well? Why is it not the hatch? Oh wait; this is where they can spin the donkey wheel. What is this nonsense? Faucke explains that this is a great electromagnetic place. Faucke tells Desmond that Whidmore is only interested in Power, not answers. Desmond doesn’t believe Faucke. Faucke doesn’t trust Desmond, and thus, throws Desmond down the well. That just sucks. “We don’t have to worry about him anymore?” says Faucke to Sayid or Sawyer or both. And in walks Hurley, Jack and Sun. Hugo, “Ummm, Hey!” Hugo says that they have come to talk to Faucke. WOW! Hurley is being awesome. But don’t trust him, Hurley, LOOK OUT!
Sun, Jack and Lapidus slowly come out of the Woods. Jack is just filled with sadness.

OFF ISLAND – Desmond, is at a school and watching Locke in his wheel chair. It’s Locke’s school and Ben’s school where they teach. Ben comes to question Desmond about being such a creepster. Desmond says that he has a son named Charlie in this sideways timeline, and is looking at schools for him. Then Desmond, follows by running right into John Locke, in his mother flipping wheel chair. WTF?

THOUGHTS
- Again, WTF? People dying, being blown up, falling down wells, and running over people.
- Does Desmond know what he is doing? I think he is trying to fix the island timeline, perhaps.
- Thanks to Hugo's question, we know what the whispers are. Although, they don't seem that great to listen to Hugo, They seem to be trapped souls in hell, aka the island.
- Just seriously, Desmond had to hit a man in a wheel chair? That's just cold, Desmond.

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Desmond, Bruuuthaaa!

2010-04-06T19:08:00.000-07:00

***SPOILER'S FROM LOST FROM 4/6/2010 EPISODE***

Began with the eye shot. We have My Bruutha, Desmond!

Penny's Dad and Penny's Hubby show down. Ben shot Desmond, and killed Jacob. Ben's a douche. Whidmore tells Bruuthaa that he is now back on the island and Des responds by trying to escape. He's pissed. The island is not done with him yet.

"What is Desmond doing here?" asks, Jin. Tests are scheduled,....GAHH this is moving fast! Where are these effers? Testing what the magnetic fields? This is nuts. I SEE RABITS! Crap, they're gonna do this stupid rabbit time shift thing with Des. So stupid. Why is Jin just hanging out too? Well that was stupid, do people not talk to one another? Why does this place look like a cabin? That guy is FRIED. YUCK. Don't hurt Desmond, DAMMIT!

Still Island - removing the dead fried guy. Why are we looking at this again? Srsly. DON't hurt Desmond. MOTHER EFFER! Des will be fine because of his catastrophic electromagnetic crap he got when the hatch blew up? So Des can save us all? Go DES! Already freed himself, and Whidmore confirms, he may be able to protect us all! What will happen? I am scurred.
Lights Flashing. Crazy rays, and now clouds.

OFF ISLAND - Des sees Hurley and he confirms the carrousel number for baggage. Des helps Clare. I miss her non crazy look. Des has the hots for pregnant chicks. He also can tell what baby Clare is having. A boy. Des gets picked up by George Minkowski from the ship. Des has his own driver and stuff. Wonder if he is working for Whidmore? Des you may not want company, but it seems you were hitting on preggars Clare though. Weren't you Des?
And he is working for Whidmore. Just like the other characters, they have a connection in both timelines.

OFF ISLAND - Oh wait, I thought Whidmore was Charlie's father for a sec. But no. I guess he will save Charlie for us. So here, Whidmore LOVES Des. Awesome. Wonder what turn of events had that happen.
IT'S CHARLIE!! I love that Charlie and Des have the connection both places too. So, did Charlie, just try to commit suicide? Oh no, I guess he just needs a drink. makes sense.
Charlie, is pissed about the babysitter, Des. Wait what's his job? Oh whatever. I love their accents,...keep talking.
Charlie tells a story about his love in his near death experience. I think he is talking about Clare, but it's hard to tell. In my mind it's about Clare. Des gives Charlie a "Choice". Very island-esque.

Driving around in the car, the DriveShaft song is on. Now Charlie, is offering Des, a choice, but no HOLY F*CK they go off into the water. Charlie is drowning and Des gets out. This is CRAZY. Is Charlie really gonna die by drowning again? **DES has a flash sideways about the NOT Penny's BOAT incident.** Crazy. Des goes back and gets Charlie out of the car. Charlie appears knocked out still.

STILL OFF ISLAND - Des is in the hospital being questioned. Is that Harper? I don't recognize the Doctor. Who cares. Des is going to get a MRI. Uh ohhss. What is going to happen with this madness?
FYI - MRIs Suck BAD!
Odd he has visions of Penny. Then he has a panic attack. He needs to fine Charlie. Now he runs into Jack, and then there's Charlie running down the hall in a hospital gown. WOW! Charlie knows that Des saw something, just as Charlie must have when he almost died on the plane. AHH shucks, wanted to see Charlie's bum. Charlie tells Des to start looking for Penny. I assume, that Charlie is looking for Clare, even though he doesn't know he is looking for her yet.

STILL OFF ISLAND - Whidmore is informed that Charlie is MIA. Now he's mad that Des couldn't deliver Charlie to Mrs. Whidmore. So we finally get to meet Mrs. Whidmore. YIKES. Oh of course it is Eloise Hawking. Does that mean that Penny and Daniel are related? WOW she's major understanding with Des. Interesting.... Of course he hears, "Penny". And now Mrs. W is pissed at Des about looking at the list. This is crazy ridiculous. She's schizophrenic. How is she always "so in the know?" Hawking is like the all-knowing, God-like being. She says to Desmond that "You're not ready." Des goes to leave, but wait, no. WOW. DANIEL!! Whoot. Is Daniel the Rockstar? Are Daniel and Desmond gonna throw down, because Des didn't deliver him Charlie? GAHH Commercial!

STILL OFF ISLAND - Yes, here Daniel goes by DAN! That is awesome. More Love at first sight, crap. GEEZ! Charlotte, he loves Charlotte. Dan is a musician, but he wrote quantum mechanics. Somehow, Dan knows about the sideways island timeline. Crazy. Dan knows that Des is looking for his love, Penny. The Whidmore family is all in the know. Oh, Penny is Dan's half sister. Where and when you can find her???
NO FREAKING WAY! She is running the stadium like Des and Jack had done, so long ago. Freaky.

ISLAND - And Des wakes up, back on the island in the sideways different island timeline. Des is the only one that can transfer back and forth! Of course he is. AWESOME! Des is on board with doing anything to help. GREAT!
Zoe asks what's happen to Des. He said, a lot can happen in a quick amount of time. And then of course, Sayid comes to save him?? WTF? Sayid, NOOO!

OFF ISLAND - Des had passed out, when he shoke Penny's hand. She's his constant. Ohh Des asks Penny to go for a coffee. So nice. OH WOW....he's working both sides? I have no idea?? So confusing, but awesome and wondrous. I love it!

THOUGHTS

- Too many to count. I love everything about this.

- Nothing too new learned, Danny and Penny are related, Whidmore is Danny’s Dad

- Desmond, as if we didn’t know before, is VERY special

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Sometimes Your Package is a Who

2010-03-30T19:11:00.000-07:00

****SPOILER POST - LIVE Lost Blogging of March 30th Episode***

Okay who are we now? This is weird. I hate the night vision point of view.
Island - Faucke speaks to Jin. They discuss the cave that Faucke showed Sawyer

OFF Island - Sun and Jin centric episode. They escape the clutches of the FAA at the airport. So they aren't married here...interesting.

Island - Faucke is running an errand and Sayid is worried about his absence of feeling.
Jin tries to escape the Faucke contingent, and the Faucke camp gets attacked by tiny arrows, shot by large nerds. They take Jin.

Island - Now at the Beach with the people. Waiting for Richie Rich, ole eyeliner to come back...now they all wait. Sun is PISSED. She wants to garden instead. Jack comes to explain the crazy lighthouse to Sun. She wants to be left alone. I think she just wants to get some.

OFF island - Damned subtitles. LAME. I like Sun's cockiness and she shows Jin some bra and boobs! So then they ummm, do it, I guess.

Island - Faucke startles Sun in the garden just as she gets a papercut. Faucke is trying to get Sun to his camp, but Sun ain't fallin for it. She runs off and Faucke chases her threw the tall grass. Faucke, is just mean and too crafty.
Even after the commercial, Faucke continues his chase.

OFF Island – Now in bed in LA with subtitles. Oh NO! Keamy is there, he’s gonna capture Jin and lock him in the freezer!

Island – Sun hit her head while she was running away. Now Ben finds Sun and she tells about Faucke.
Faucke returns to his camp and finds the passed out people that were attacked by tooth picks. “Where is Jin?”
Okaayyyy, so Jin is trapped in that weird video room that Karl was in so long ago. Guess he’s watching some videos. HE decides to turn it off. Room 23 is where it is thanks, Zoe or who ever you are.
Jin just wants to leave to go find Sun. The crazy lady, Zoe wants some answers to Jin’s old maps.

Now back to Fauck’s camp with crazy Claire and company. Crazy Claire is afraid to go home now, she has traded positions with Kate almost….and why is Kate’s name not on the wall. Great Faucke, way to entice people to hurt one another.

“No cause that would be ridiculous.” Love you Sawyer for making a mockery of it all. Faucke and Sayid heading over to the other island, by way of boat, because, thanks to Sawyer asking, we now know Smokey can’t just head over to the other island in his smokey form.

OFF Island – Keamy is being crazy, searching Sun’s room, then they invite another dude in. These guys are not cool. They are looking for the envelope of money. They send for a translator. It’s the Russia guy, Mikhail. Sun plans on giving the money to them from her acct and blah blah blah. Father can’t know, blah blah blah.

Island – Jack is inspecting Sun’s head. Sun can’t speak English anymore. Sucks.
Then Guyliner walks in. Now they’re leaving again…”pack your bags”, he declares.
Faucke is getting shot at and he walks past the pilans but not through them. Whidmore confronts Faucke about Jin. Faucke exclaims, “A wise man once said that war is coming to the island. I think it just got here.” Fun!

Island – Guyliner says they are going to stop Faucke. Sun is pissed again. Effing subtitles. Sun needs to get some BAD!

OFF Island – Sun’s father took her money from her account. Oh noes!
Here goes Jin, being put in the Freezer. Don’t worry, Sayid will save you Jin. Keamy informs that Paik was in the know about the relationship between Sun and Jin. Keamy was supposed to kill Jin, but there is no fee to pay him now.

Island – They are nerds! She’s a geophysicist. Poor Jin always getting locked up, now released to speak to Whidmore.
Ohhh Whidmore lets Jin see his baby. Whidmore MUST be good. Baby picture sharing means you’re good. Whidmore is trying to stop Faucke from leaving the island. Ohh and he plans to show Jin his package. His package is a Who!

OFF Island - Sayid comes to save Jin. They have a connection. Also Sayid has a great accent off-island. Jin wants to be free. Sayid gives Jin the means to be free, but does not free him. Now Sun is taken to the restaurant to meet up with them. They see the dead Paik mercenaries. There is a bit of a stand off and more subtitles. Jin shoots Mikhail and blinds him, nice! But Sun was also shot. EFF! She was even pregnant. CRAP!

Island - Jack gives Sun a pep talk. She gets to write. Jack found a tomoto is Sun's garden after 3 years. Special tomato! Jack asks Sun what Faucke said. Jack offers to help Sun find Jin.
Kate and Sawyer discuss the crap that's going down. Sawyer is pissed. But Faucke says he doesn't like secrets, so Sayid is investigating. AND WHAT THE EFF? NOOO! It's my Bruutha, Desmond!

Thoughts
- Sun and Jin are so close to being together, but their fate may keep them apart
- Having your dead wife talk to you makes you change yourself REAL FAST
- The Smoke Monster is restricted by some things, water, pilans, running quickly away
- Sawyer thinks that Smokey is kind of rediculous

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - So, Who is Really the Bad One?

2010-03-23T17:16:00.000-07:00

****SPOILER POST - Post is Live Blogging of Tuesday, March 23, 2010 Episode of LOST****

Ilana again?? Where is Guyliner? Ilana explains the candidates on the island to the Jack, Hurley, Sun brigade.
So now what Richard, time to explain the next step. Yes, tell us the secret Guyliner. No, they're not in Hell. Really, Guyliner....

ISLAND - Ilana is going after Guyliner. We're all talking about the illusive Guyliner.....okay, ready to flash back now....oh we did!

FB - And we're in the Canary Islands. Nice! Isabella is pretty and sick. (SIDE NOTE -The Lost creators did not borrow Isabella's name from Twilight, I can assure you....I think). Spanish, doctors, death, and crosses oh my.
I don't trust the mean doctor who has the cross. He is a dick and Guyliner may have killed him. Opps. Oh no, she died why he was gone. Now Guyliner, has nothing. Poor Guyliner, he must wear the eyeliner scar for the rest of his days, much like the Scarlet Letter.
Wow, this priest is a mean too. No forgiveness for Guyliner's sin.

Still FB - They are taking Guyliner to die for murdering the doctor,,,. And Whitfield (some guy from Black Rock?) is going to save him, no, I was just wrong. Now he's going on the Black Rock ship, to the new world. But I bet they'll get Lost, ha! Umm, the Black Rock's prisoners see the statue and the ship is what destroyed the foot statue...okay.
As the boat is shipwrecked it appears that all are alive, including Guyliner of course. So the Captain is just killing all people like a madmen. Crazy. This is an effed up history that Guyliner has....Oh wait I guess Smokey killed all the people and now he is going to investigate Guyliner....but he's saved. Strange.

Still FB - Guyliner is trying to cut himself free from the chains. He's close to death, trying to free himself. Sad times. LOOK! There's a Boar! Oh no, he lost his tool. Wow! He sees Isabella in his dreams she also says that they are in Hell. Are they? Seems so...this is depressing me thoroughly.

THANK GOD! Literally....wait no, isn't that the "Man in Black" from before? with Jacob.... They are dead!?! That guy is so the devil, not Jacob/God....I don't want them, all the Losties to be dead. They gotta kill the devil. Ummm, okay.

FB - Guyliner is eating. Oh this guy is NOT nice. He is trying to get the guy to kill Jacob. I do not trust him because he is in black and white is better. This sounds racist. But it is so how it goes in this dark/evil comparison realm.
So, Guyliner does what he is told and heads toward the statue, that has been destroyed by Black Rock. But he is getting punched out by Jacob (in his white shirt).
GOOD! Jacob says that he's NOT DEAD! YAAAYYY! He tries to drown Guyliner to prove a point. They're gonna talk.

Still FB - Guyliner FINALLY got his own blankets. Jacob must invite people to the island, ok. Jacob says he is not the devil (duh, of course he's say no). He brought the ship to the island. Okay, so the island is the cork of a wine bottle. Interesting. Jacob gives Guyliner a job to be his intermediary to all people on the island. Here, Jacob gives him the everlasting life. Oh no, the man in black gave him the chance to change his mind. DON'T DO IT GUYLINER!
He buries his wife's cross necklace.

Island @ Present - Guyliner goes to area where he buried his wife's necklace. He says he changed his mind out loud. He calls out for Faucke, aka Man in Black. BUT Hurley comes to change his mind by informing him about Isabella being there and that he, Hurley can talk to her. Hurley passes on a lovely message. Tears...
He puts on his wife's cross. Hurley tells us that we have to stop Faucke/Man in Black from leaving the island!!
Wait are there 2 men in Black? Oh wait this is from before.
Someone else can take Jacob's place, YES!

THOUGHTS
- Thankfully we are not in Hell on the Island
- Someone can take Jacob's place and keep the man in black on the island
- There is definitely a good/bad thing going on here
- WE GOT TO SEE Richard's LIFE & STORY

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Take Me to Your Leader

2010-03-16T17:52:00.000-07:00

******SPOILER POST - LIVE blogging of LOST episode from Tuesday, March 16th******

Are we heading into a Sawyer/Jin Episode? Why would Sawyer leave the New Otherton, oh that is right, Fuacke talked him into coming with him. Is this a Kate-Sawyer reunion? Yes, it is. And anti-climatic, as usual. Why did Kate just follow Faucke? Again, Kate is DUMB!

OFF ISLAND - GOD BLESS AMERICA! We have Sawyer centric episode and shirtless Sawyer. And Sawyer's shenanigans with the cash and junk, oh wait, so now Sawyer is getting busted, or rather the chick is getting busted, because Sawyer is a mother flipping COP! That is just plain hot right there. I also love that he is working with Miles. Miles can be a legitimate investigator with his super powers. Love it!

ISLAND - With crazy Clare and her crazy squirrel baby. Thank god, Kate please put the squirrel baby out of it's misery. Kate's like WTF, Clare? So you're asking questions finally, you moron.

OFF ISLAND - Sawyer makin calls and working with Miles. Awesome Sawyer has a date,... Miles, asks "Do you want to die alone?" Miles can tell that Sawyer is lying to him.

ISLAND - Hiking adventures never cease on LOST island. Faucke has man boobs. OK, so Faucke admits out loud that he is the smoke monster. And the smoke monster can be killed? huh? How? Sending Sawyer over to Hydra island for investigations, cause Sawyer is a great liar. NICE, way to make a man feel useful.

OFF ISLAND - Sawyer goes on his set up date from Miles, and it's with Charlotte. Awwww. Oh wow, Sawyer in a suit is gorgeous. This is the greatest episode ever! Oh my goodness, Jimmy Boy still has his bad attitude and hot temper to match his hot bod.

ISLAND - Sawyer back to Hydra island, first time, since he was here doing the nasty with Kate, I think. He cuddles Kate's clothes. Um wow!Faucke's island group is like manic central.
And Sawyer finds the plane! The plane the plane! And a pile of dead people. This episode goes from good, to just crazy bad. Oh wow, there's actually a live one, here.

OFF ISLAND - Aww Charlie's bro. So nice. And Miles is PISSED at Sawyer for lying to him. A little harsh about going to Australia maybe? Miles gives Sawyer (or Jim as he's known off-island) the kiss off.

ISLAND - Gives the live one, named Zoe some water. Zoe claims that when she returned from gathering wood, all the people were dead.
Poor Kate crying by herself. Faucke comes to talk with her. He discusses the crazy Clare situation. She asks where Sawyer went.
Sawyer figures out that Zoe is not who she says she is. And now we see more people with guns. Sawyer surrenders.

Kate and Faucke chill on the beach. Wow, Kate is being uber bitchy. I like it. So Faucke is trying to bond with Kate, but comes off creepy.
More trompsing through the jungle, but now headed to Whidmore's submarine.

OFF - ISLAND - It's almost like Sawyer does the sames shizz on or off the island, just like all the other sideways story lines "Little House on the Praire" giving meaningfull messages since the 1980s.
Sawyer goes to make up with Charlotte. She bitches him out and slams the door in his face.

ISLAND - Sawyer finds a double padlocked door on his way to Whidmore, inside the sub....don da don! Now, Sawyer talks with Whidmore. Sawyer is trying to arrange his way plus some others off the island with Whidmore assistance. Trust will obviously be an issue. Saywer is going to lead Faucke to Whidmore in exchange of a way off the island. Let's see how he does this madness, or is he lying to Whidmore? Hmmmm...

Kate walking alone in the forest. She comes upon Crazy Clare, who apologizes. Is this for real? I want it to be. Why does Clare have to be so crazy?

Sawyer comes back to Faucke. He informs that the passengers from the plane are all dead. He also tells Faucke the entire plan he told Whidmore. Why Sawyer, WHY?

OFF-ISLAND - Miles walking down the street and gets picked up by Sawyer. NICE. He tells Miles all about the Sawyer guy that caused the death of his parents. Um wow, something odd just happen. Sawyer got hit by Kate's car as she tried to escape. They can't stay apart those crazy cats.

ISLAND - Yup they're together here too. Planning their escape. Then they look all seductively at one another. Ohh yummmm.

THOUGHTS
- Yes indeedy, Faucke is doubly confirmed to be the smoke monster, so he said
- Whidmore has arrived, with men with guns
- Kate is dumb, but she can cause Sawyer's shirt to come off. Always good!

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Cheese Carrots

2010-03-09T17:54:00.000-08:00

***Contains SPOILERS from this week's lost that aired on Tuesday, March 9th 2010***

So this week do we get to fine what of Hurley and Jack. No, right now we are running with Ben. Oh good, they are going back to the beach.

OFF ISLAND - Licing with Ben as your teacher. Odd. We are learning about Napolean. "He might just as well have been dead." Yeah it's Arzt! He blew up, on the island. NICE. Locke suggests that maybe Ben should be the Principal of their school. Interesting....not really.

ISLAND - Ben explaining about the smoke monster now. Ilana wants Miles to explain how Jacob died. Miles does his freaky shizz and then properly informs that Ben killed Jacob. Will Ben meet his end? Nope, Ilana just laid that awesome woman guilt trip.

Still Island. Now at the Beach. We never get out of this little section of the island as it seems. Maybe if they left it more often, they would have foundb the lighthouse.

OFF ISLAND - Ben is heating a dinner for his Dad. Looks like Dad has cancer. Oh, his Dad is his same Dad from Island. I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Oh they are day dreaming about the Island life they may have been missing. Ohhh, Alex is here! She is a student. Oh, I missed Alex.

ISLAND - Ilana, Sun, and company, are rebuilding at the beach. Candidates to replace Jacob! We just learned an answer! I love learning answers.

"Cheese Carrots." I love Hurley's one liners. Jack is leaving and Hurley is trying to stop him from going back to the Temple. YES! It's GuyLiner, Alpert.

Ben is being nastalgic for all of us. How awesome. Suddenly, Ilana is pointing a gun at Ben and having him walk. Is she executing him? She is first tying, him up, and now making him dog his own grave, because of his murdering Jacob. Ilana doesn't mess around.

OFF ISLAND - The East India Trading Company is being studied here with Alex and Ben. This is touching. And now Ben can get to be PRincipal, but off island he deserves to be leader.

ISLAND - Ben is digging his own grave. So Jacob cared about being killed, so says Miles.

I love that Hurley asks if Guyliner is a Vampire. Hurley's questions are the best. Guyliner informs that all the people at the Temple are dead, but Kate and Sayid weren't there. I love that Jake after 6 seasons, has learned how to ask questions instead of standing there, all sad face. What? Now Guyliner warns Jack and Hurley not to believe Jacob... Huh? And like Faucke is trying to leave the island, Guyliner is trying to figure out how to die.

OFF ISLAND - Arzt and Ben are talking about taking over the school.

ISLAND - Now back in the belly of the ship with Guyliner and company. When Jacob touches you, it's a curse or a gift to keep you alive forever. Jack is going to help Guyliner die via explosion. And we learn another answer....you can't kill yourself, you must be killed by another. Ahh ha.

Jack wants to talk with Guyliner. He sends Hurley away. Jack explains the lighthouse to Guyliner. AHHHH the fuse is burning to the dynamite. What is going to happen? And the fuse fizzled. Wonder if Guyliner is pissed that he died. Jack suggests going back to where they started.

Ben hears bad sounds at the gravesite area at the Beach, it's smokey, AKA Faucke. Ben asks, "What are you doing here?" So can Ilana not see Faucke? Of course Faucke is asking Ben to stay in charge of the Island. Faucke releases Ben and tells him to come to Hydra and how she can kill Ilana there. She goes after him as he runs away.

OFF ISLAND - Ben goes to see the principal. Ben gives the principal email messages that implicate his behavior with the nurse. This is blackmail and now Ben has to choose between Alex and himself.

ISLAND - Ilana chasing after Ben in the jungle. Ben got to the rifle and is now pointing it at Ilana. She asks what he is waiting for in shooting him. Ben tells about his difficult decision between Alex and the island. Yup, he faces the same thing off island as well. Ben says he must go to Locke because he is the only one that will have him. But Ilana says she'll have him. Ohhh, teary eyed.

OFF ISLAND - Oh no. Did Ben give Alex up again? Oh wait, Alex got a good letter of reccomendation. Oh Good, Ben choose right. YeahhH!

ISLAND - Ben and Ilana come back to the beach. Que, Jack and Hurley?? Oh and Ben goes to help Sun. How lovely. Again, where the eff is Yin? Awwww, Slow hug shot. Why are they making me so teary?

WTF?? What the, huh? Ohh it's Widmore in a Sub.

THOUGHTS
- This show mader me tear up several times, all the father-daughter Alex memories and nice Ben, and the Hurley-Sun reunion.
- Learned some things. FINALLY. Biggest secret - the candidates were to be the new Jacob.

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Kate IS Stupid

2010-03-02T17:50:00.000-08:00

******SPOILER POST******** CONTAINS INFO FROM EPISODE AIRED ON March 2nd

Ready for my Questions to be Answered. So this is a Sayid centered Episode. Damn his hair is greasy. Nadia is very pretty. Okay in this alternative reality Sayid does not get the girl. Poor Sayid. Whoot Sayid works on Contracts too! I feel like Sayid and I are kin!

ISLAND - Sayid is going to get us some answers, but only about him and the tests from three weeks ago. LAME. Like I've said before, we have the Black/White, Good/Bad, Yin/Yang thing going on.....we get it. Get more answers Sayid. Beat it out of this man. The, "it's just a baseball" fell to the ground. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

STILL ISLAND - Crazy Clare and Faucke. Clare is looking for her son and heading in the temple for her son. He's not there Clare. Why does she believe Faucke?

OFF ISLAND - FYI - Sayid loves black wife beater shirts in all alternative realities. Sayid's brother is bad news, he also does not prefer wife beaters. Sayid is NOT that man anymore, but still likes his black wife beater, always.

ISLAND - Sayid is leaving and is banished because he's evil. Here comes Crazy Clare to deliver a message about "Him". So the Others, and mainly Lennon just now figured out Jack and Hugo were gone. Observant.
Now Sayid will be assisting Dogen...will he be torturing Clare? Okay no. Will Dogen use Sayid to kill the evil that is Faucke?. To be good, Sayid must commit murder...interesting.

OFF ISLAND - Seems like Sayid's bro is a DICK. The kids are not down with him. Brother, attacked, in hospital. There goes Jack. Hi Jack! Oh no, now Sayid is going to kill his brother's attacker, off island. Sayid is a killer no matter where he is, just as much as Jack is a doctor.

ISLAND - Kate runs into Sayid and sends her to speak with Miles. I love that this temple has a simple door but they could not find the place for years upon years. Oh Crap, here comes the Clare/Kate show down.

Now Sayid tromping through the jungle. Strange noises and now Sayid says bring it, he them stabs Faucke, who says, "Why'd you go and do that?"
Now Faucke has the knife. Will he kill Faux Sayid or Fayid?
Faucke wants Fayid to deliver a message to Dogen. But then asks him about what he wants from the world.

OFF ISLAND - Apples and Potatoes. Sayid stayed at the house and did not attack the attacker, apparently. Sayid believes he is evil off the island.

ISLAND - SO maybe Fayid agreed with Faucke, or maybe not. But he delivers a message to the others, informing them about Jacob. The Others are free. Can leave the temple and join the man or die. Well those choices suck.

Kate is looking for Clare. Goes to see her and finds her singing the falling star pocket song. Kate explains where Aaron is and Clare looks pissed. Clare warns, that "HE is coming and they can't stop him." Obviously this is Faucke. But why does Crazy Clare have to sound like a crazy person awaiting Dracula's return? I love Clare, but can someone cure her crazy, please?
Still on the island. Fayid delivered his message and now the Others are panicking

OFF ISLAND - Strange dudes come to question Sayid at his brotehr's house. They also speak Arabic, like to short order cook and prefer breakfast foods. Oh I hated this dude, forgot his name. He always seemed like such a DICK though. Martin is his first name, but we called him by his last name, Keamy before. This is a typical Mob shake down for more borrowed money, situation. But Sayid can take names and kick ass. And there is someone locked in the freezer. Yup, it's Jin.

ISLAND - Where the hell is Island, Jin? Did he come back to the Temple? I forgot. Fayid asks Dogen why he didn't kill Fayid before? Dogen tells his sad tell of drunk driving....srsly? Thanks Carlton and Damon for the Drunk Driving Message...featuring Jacob. FYI - It really was a baseball. DOgen knows that Faucke offered Fayid a similar bargain. Then, Fayid dramatically tackles DOgen in the water. There goes one of the most interesting characters remaining in LOST. Lennon is obviously distraught as he walks into the scene. Now he is dead.
Smokey invades the Temple. Kate goes to get Clare and somehow Miles where everything is. Holy crap now, Ilana saves them with Lapidus, Sun and crew.Sun learns her husband is on the island, and finally someone else asks where Jin is. Tied up at Clare's place?

Sayid is not to be saved, as he tells Ben. Ahh too much is happening. Thank God someone has a plan (Ilana). Kate and Clare go into the courtyard and see the massacre. How did they get out of the hole? Kate goes out to Faucke and the Others. No one talks to her and she just follows. Kate is stupid.

THOUGHTS
-I did not receive any answers.
-I often stand up for Kate, mainly because I love the Evangeline, but she is plain dumb.
-Can't effing wait until next week! Jin-Sun reunion. Bigger Kate-Clare showdown. So exciting.
-NOOOO, only 10 more.

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - Cancelled this week.

2010-02-23T16:59:00.000-08:00

I am in pain and miserable = no live blogging. :(

Woke up Sunday with some neck pain, that turned into lots of neck pain on Monday and now Tuesday. I am a very sad panda. I know my 5 readers will be dissapointed. Oh well. Check out these great LOST sites:

http://sussingoutlost.blogspot.com/

http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20313460_20344822,00.html

Lost is Life LIVE Blogging - WTF??

2010-02-16T17:47:00.001-08:00

***Contains SPOLIERS from Tuesday Feb 16th LOST episode. ***

Neighborhoods on LOST all look the same. So this alternative, off-Island, LOST is going to be about Locke. Poor John. He now has Hurley's bad luck, but he is getting some lovin from Peg Bundy, aka Helen so all is good and can enjoy coffee in the tub. Locke may always be into destiny or at least surrounded by those that will reinforce a dependence on destiny, both on or off the island.

Island - We are the flying smoke monster which is nice, this could be a video came, called Smokey Island. So Richard was caught by Faux Locke, or as I call him Faucke.

Off-island - Back to his cubicle and the office. And they still call him Colonel. So Locke didn't go to the conference and now he is fired. Wow.

Island - Faucke discusses the way Jacob ruled Richard on the Island. Faucke said he never would have done that. WAIT, what did Faucke just see/ A boy, what?

Ben is in Jacob's laire and goes into talk with Ilana. Ben explains how her people died. She then takes the ashes that were Jacob. And apparently Faucke is now recruiting for his new Hell Army. This is most def a heaven and hell motif going on here.

Faucke goes into a cabin in New Otherton, where music is playing. Most likely it is Sawyer's cabin... And yes, here he is. Apprently, Faucke admits he is indeed dead, or that "Locke" is indeed dead. This cannot make sense to a drunk person.

Island - Sawyer in New Otherton, in his underwear, NICE!! In his underwear but he has shaved, that is odd...oh wait not really. Even drunk Sawyer can tell that it is Faucke and not Locke. NO! Don't put pants on!

Off island - Locke has his box of stuff. It's Happy-go-lucky Hurley, blocking in Locke. Hugo, not "hurley" is giving some of his luck to Locke.

Island - Walking with Ilana, see Sun, Ben, et al. They're all about to leave the statue/Jacob area. Sun suggests they bury the dead, real Locke.

Now Faucke and Sawyer walking through the woods. Can't believe Sawyer left with him. They see the kid again. Faucke chases the kid. Kid says, "Remember you Can't Kill him. That is against the rules." Faucke responds with a very Lockian statement, "Don't tell me what I can't do." WTF???

Still on island - Sawyer screaming for Locke, but Richard shows up. Richard tells Sawyer about Faucke's evil plans to kill everyone. "riiiighhht." Again, Faucke is so the devil.

Off-island - Locke is at the temp agency, Hugo suggested and freaked by the interview. Yeah!! It's Rose. She is the supervisor, here. Rose tries to be "realistic" and explains that she has terminal cancer, but she lives her life. Ohh poor Rose.

Island - Books, Faucke does not know about Steinbeck. Well that sucks. But Sawyer may just pull a Lenny on Faucke, or he may try to. "what I am is trapped." So smokey was a man, once? Sawyer, I wish you would just shoot him, really I would.

Still island - Ben is questioning the hell out of Ilana, as they carry dead Locke to the Losties, graveyard. At least Locke will be where he wanted to be. Locke would like being buried there I think. Sad times. Poor dead, island Locke. Is it fitting that Ben is giving the eulogy when he was the one that killed him and Ben admits that Locke was a better man then him? Yes. Love this.
Pilot Lapidus is all Rosencrantz and Guildenstern burying Locke and cracking jokes, all by himself.

Off-island - Locke makes an attempt to call Dr. Sheperd, but then hangs up. Locke's bag arrives from the Oceania courier. Locke admits to not going to the conference and shows Helen his bag full of knives. Locke is taking Rose's advice to heart. Maybe his life will turn around after his acceptance. But I do hate hearing Locke say there are no miracles. Off-island LOST needs a christ figure and bad!

Island - So Sawyer continues to follow Faucke. Is this how Faucke is gonna kill Sawyer? Cause if he dies I will punch someone. Okay, that was extra close.

Now we have a black and white stone in some sort of cave in the mountain. Faucke throws out the white rock into the ocean. Faucke and Sawyer walk through a doorway and see a rock with names listed and crossed out. "James that is why you are here."

So it's all a game, this finding of good and bad people on the island. Between Jacob and Smokey (the man in black or the black stone). Is there more?

Off-island - I love Locke as a coach! That is perfect for him. And a teacher. He couldn't find another thing better to do. Where is Walt? Ben is a teacher too? SHUT UP!!

Island - Sawyer wonders about the writer of the names. Jacob died yesterday. I love Sawyer's matter of factness. "Jacob had a thing for numbers." Some of those who have died since yesterday, still have not had their names crossed off. So Faucke says that Jacob manipulated all the people on the list. You were a candidate to protect the place.

Faucke's 3 choices:
1) Do nothing
2) Accept the job, become new Jacob and protect the island (but nothing to protect it from according to Faucke)
3) Just get the hell off the island.

How do we get off the island? - Together.

Thoughts
Again, overall WTF?

LOST is Life LIVE Blogging - SAWYER IS NOT A ZOMBIE

2010-02-09T17:54:00.000-08:00

***POST CONTAINS SPOILERS from LOST 2nd episode of this last season.**

No shoes and typewriters. Sayid is fine and Juliet is not and Sawyer is pissed.

Back to the alternative realty. Hey it's that guy from Heros. I miss Claire. Wonder when they filmed this scene? And Claire was in fact still pregnant and she wanted her suitcase.

Island Time - Who are these people?" asks Sayid. Hugo is now the leader, so says Miles, and "That's pretty great!" Jack is confused by why Sayid is thanking him.

The Other leaders need to talk to Sayid alone. Questions questions. Fighting, fighting and now Sawyer the outlaw, "Don't come after me". Sawyer doesn't want any life now as it seems, or needs to grieve more. Who knows...it's Sawyer, he's un predictable.

Kate is gonna track Sawyer, despite his warning.

Off-Island - Now we see Kate's rest of her off island experience, post airport.
Garage dude, gets Kate out of the cuffs. Kate has only Claire's bag full of baby trinkets and no clothes that we see for her to change into yet. She feels bad?? Maybe??

Island - Kate, Jin, and some Other-others are going to look for Sawyer. Teary goodbye for Jate or Kack.

Island - head Other Dogen, is checking out Sayid's oura and giving him piercings. Nice. Or electrocuting him, either one. Why Why? So that was a test. Sucks to be him. Guess he failed the test, cause the Lennon guy (hippie looking dude) says, "I just lied to him, didn't I?" Did Dogen fake the test? I think he did!!

Off-island - Still Kate's story, and she brings back Claire her stuff. Off-island Kate is going to help Claire? The couple didn't show up taht was to adopt Claire's baby. Hmmmm??

Island - Why the temple. Ticker Ticker sound and black smoke. Geez Other dude, don't have to be a dick. Kate is tricky tricky. She escaped the Other dudes. Why am I calling everyone a dude?
Sayid says he was tortured, not that it was a test. Weird. Whateves. Now Jack goes to visit Dogen. Sayid has the sickness. Jack has to give him this pill, and won't for now. Your friend, got shot by someone in 1970's, helping Jack and now DOgen is playing on Jack's conscious. NICE. Give him the medicine Jack! Do IT!

Side note - Where is Harper? Lostpedia says she's still alive. Shouldn't someone tell her that Juliet is gone so she can give her bitch face smile?

Still Island - Miles is looking at Sayid and questioning him. Hurley, "You're not a Zombie, right?" In the food court, what?? Diagnosis discussion and Jack gives Sayid the pill, but honesty prevails for Jack. He cannot tell a lie, or it's difficult for him to. J explains that he didn't fix Sayid, it was them. Do you or don't you?

Jin now questioning about the Ajira plane. Kate is not looking for Sawyer per se, but trying to escape with him.

Off- Island - Couple should be nice based on neighborhood so says Claire. Claire is unusually friendly with Kate for just having been held at gun point. DO the adoptive parents story, is that the husband left the mom. She can't do it alone, but now Claire has to. Claire is now in labor. That was quick compared to the island.

Island - New Otherton village with Kate. Sawyer unburied something from under his old house. Shoebox of memories? He finds Kate. (Can't believe there is only 20 minutes left - Ugghh!)

Off-island = Going to the hospital with Kate and Claire. So Kate is gonna be with Claire again while she is in labor. Doctor GoodSpeed, aka Ethan....NICE! Having a baby now or later. Claire says she is not ready and the baby's heart beat flat lined. Oh woe he was always Aaron to Claire. She named him and everything. Trippy that Kate is with her now, isn't it?

Island - New Otherton, Kate talks to Sawyer and tells him that she needs to find Claire. What did Sawyer say? Lunch Time? Sawyer blames himself for Juliet's death because he didn't want to be alone. "Some of us are meant to be alone." He was gonna ask her to marry him. So sad. Sawyer tells Kate to leave.

Dogen is playing spinny with a baseball. Must be significant, or not. Dogen likes to remain separate from the people he rules with his speak. He was "brought here", like them all. By Jacob perhaps? Jack will not give the pill to Sayid unless he knows what's in it. Dogen plays the you have to just trust me card. Jack one ups with throwing back the pill and Dogen Freaks. Alright so it's poison.

FYI - Anna from V commercial looks like a chick from a LOST Oceana fake airline commercial. And Hi Juliet!

Off-island - Claire admires her baby's portrait. The detectives come into Claire's hospital room to question Claire. Claire covers for Kate. Ummm Why? At least Claire questions Kate and Kate tried to claim the innocence card. Clare gives Kate her credit card and then Kate says Claire should keep the baby. Rude and evasive much?

Island - Morning. Sawyer still ignoring Kate at New Otherton. Lennon is shocked at Jack's balls in taking the pill. Frankly, so am I. Jack does drink the tea offered to him. Dogen explains that Sayid may now be "claimed". Sayid will be gone, just like it happen to Claire.

Jin is now found by the other others. He tried to run away and Island Claire saves Jin before the Other dudes, try to kill him. That is odd. Shall we call Island Claire, Crazy Claire. YES, of course.

THOUGHTS

+ More Claire! We kind of learn she went evil. Learn that Sawyer was going to propose.

- Very very few questions answered.

Random thought - Kate, Claire, & Aaron have some sort of connection, whether off or on the island in both realities.

It's that time again!.... It's LIVE LOST BLOGGING, TIME

2010-02-02T16:17:00.000-08:00

**SPOILER POST**

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

This blog contains LIVE LOST BLOGGING.

**DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU DON'T MIND SPOILERS**

Starting it's starting!! Beginning with creepy Ben voiceover describing the history of LOST. Ohh the memories. I miss Clarie! But now I want new LOST...Please Ben stop talking and play me a new episode. Ugghhh. I am going to watch and not type anything, in protest.

OKAY, now it's really LOST time. They have to show the "previously on LOST", first. Uggh, just get to it DAMMIT! (Shoot I have to pee, or am so excited that I feel like I could pee my pants, either one)

White Screen............we're back on an airplane, with Jack. He's looking around. That stewardess chick came back and gave Jack more booz. We have turbulance. Now, Rose comforts Jack about the turbulance....more shaking and now nothing...still flying. "They made it." Benard came back to his seat. How sweet are they?

Jack goes to tiny bathroom and looks over himself in mirror, sees small cut on his neck. DESMOND!!! Yes, he is next to Jack on the plane, and Jack remembers him, from somewhere... "Nice to meet you, or see you again." The sky is very clear out there as we dive down to the ocean seeing the island under ground, and the 6 toed statue. LOST LOGO TIME!

Okay, flashing back to last season and the dropping of the hydrogen bomb down and Juliet getting pulled down. Can we say, not a new scene? Oh, WOW!! It's Kate in a TREE! Monkey Kate. Is this now or then, or when? Kate's hearing is annoying me. Where is Kate? Oh it's Miles. Kate and all the Losties are back at the Hatch Door, after the Hatch exploded.

How is Jack there and on the plane? What is happening?? Sawyer is so effing pissed. He is still hurt about Juliet. Sucks.

Now, back on the plane with Kate and her marshall guy. Wow this guy is so annoying talking to Hurley in the plane and Hurley is the luckiest guy, huh? Sawyer, yummmm.

And now, everyone is back on the island too. The LOSTies are in both places at the same time. Kate found Juliet!! Sayid is dying. Dammit. Uh oh, what are we hearing??? Hurley with a gun, really? It's Jacob coming to talk to Hurley on the island.

Sun and Jin on the plane. Jin is being the dick he is. AHHHHHHHH!!!! It's Boone! Of course in the plane version of the Losties, Locke was able to go on his walk-about, as he tells Boone. Also Boone's siter, Shannon stays in Austrailia.

We get to see the faux Locke and crazy Ben staring at the fire. Faux Locke says Jacob is gone and is sending Ben to fetch Guyliner, Richard. Lapidus and Sun discuss the situation and Ben now fetches Richard to speak with John. Guyliner shows Ben, the dead, real John Locke. CRAP COMMERCIAL.

Unburrying Juliet in the former Swan hole. Where is Jscob going and without shoes? He's gonna save Sayid, I hope. Oh no, Jacob died. Okay....go to the Temple, with the guitar case.....hmmmm. Oh this is so sad, I hope they get to Juliet.

Back on the plane again. Oh no, stupid Charlie probably OD-ed. Drugs are not cool, but Charlie is. Wonder if Evangeline was happy to have him back on set again. I am thinking, YES!

Jack and Sayid working on Charlie. Yup yup! BRING HIM BACK! Ewww, gross. See Drugs are NOT COOL! "am I alive", asks Charlie.

Back to the Island Losties, hopefully saving Juliet while they remove a beam. He's gotten to her, Sawyer has gotten to her! She's alive! Oh this is making me teary. The Juliet/Sawyer thing is adorable. Hurley shares the temple plan with everyone. He looks very determined.

Now we are at the statue with Faux, Locke, Ben, and Guyliner. Faux Locke is in Jacob's chair. Guyliner is not coming in, but burley gun guy is. JACOB IS DEAD. Now the shoot at Faux Locke. There's a bent bullet on the ground and then some freaky noises. Ole smokey is coming back to get these suckers. Ahh, but smokey won't get you within the ash circles. Interesting. Now what Benjamin? Of course, we now know that Smokey is Faux Locke. Interesting.....

On-island, Kate, Sawyer and Juliet at the Swan hole. "Kiss me". I hope she doesn't die, but I think she is gonna. She didn't get to tell him her something, important. Poor Sawyer. Sad, sad sad.

On the plane LOSTies. And Charlie says he was supposed to die. Weird. Buckle up....almost home?? No! No they're not! Poor Charlie being led away. He gives Jack the evil eye. Everyone is exiting. Locke still in wheel chair. Sad Lost Musak plays. Well crap...at least there is one more hour of this "WTF beyond WTF episode".

Morning on the island. Sawyer is pissed. Sayid is near death and we have to go to Temple. Sawyer is going to bury Juliet and Sawyer is not following anyone after he does it. He asks Miles to stay and gives Jack the death stare.

They're all bringing in Sayid through the magic hole to the Temple. In the lower levels there are paths and some of the dead French Dudes. Weird weird voices. Is Smokey coming? And Kate disappears. This is some freaky stuff. Oh good, it's the others. Love Hurley--->> "Guess we found the temple."

Kate in the airport with her Marshall. She has to go potty. He sends her in to pee. She is gonna get free. Watchy watch. And there she goes. She's so violent. And now with Sawyer on the elevator and he helps Katie get away.

Back to the island. Sawyer, burying Juliet with Miles. He asks what she wanted to tell Sawyer. Miles gets real weird and kneels to the ground. Miles then says that Juliet wanted to tell Sawyer that, "it worked". What worked?

Now they are at the Temple. And the Stewardess from the first plane is there and a bunch of other people. Hurley says that Jacob sent them and he has that guitar case. They look inside and see a symbol of some kind. It's made of wood, old asian dude breaks it and gets a letter out that has the Losties names on it, I guess. The strange dude says that if Sayid dies, they are in trouble.

In Airport with Sun and Jin. Jin has a crap ton of money with him. Sun denies knowing English to customs.

Back to Temple. This is a lot of acting for these poor people and for me to type about. They are at "the stream" and the water isn't clear. They ask who did this to Sayid and they warn that there are risks if they do "this." They are gonna put Sayid in the water. They flip over an hour glass and Sayid flales around while they hold him in the water. The Losties try to stop the Others. Waiting for the hour glass. Sayid appears to have been drowned. Oh no. They lie him out and the Others tell them that Sayid is dead. Jack administers CPR with Kate by his side. Kate tries to stop him. More sadness.

So LOST stuff is on Nightline and Jimmy Kimmel tonight! Whoop whoop!

Back in Airport, Sayid looking at pic of his lady and Kate is down in baggage area trying to escape. Frogurt gets mad at Kate for trying to steal his cab. Hurley in front of Kate at the cab stand on phone. Kate is almost escaping..gets in cab with Claire. Yeahh! Claire.

The two kids from the tail section of the flight give the island Losties food. The Others bring in Sawyer and Miles. They make Hurley go see the old asian dude. Hurley tells that Jacob is dead. The Others freak out all over the place and they put powder/ash every where.

Ben figures out that the monster is faux Locke. Faux Locke explains to Ben what Real Locke was thinking when Ben killed him. Ben asks what the smokey faux Locke wants and it turns out that Smokey, faux Locke, (or Faocke) just wants to go home.

Only 5 more minutes left...back to Sayid in the Temple. Miles is looking confused over Sayid. Kate is cleaning off Sawyer and Kate tells him that the Others are now protecting the Losties, maybe. Sawyer says he isn't gonna kill Jack, so Jack'll suffer.

Back at the airport, Jack is on the phone with his mom about the loss of Jack's dead father. Locke tells Jack that they only lost his father's body, not his father. Jack asks about Locke's condition and says that no condition is irreversible. He tells Locke that he'll give Locke a free consult.

Back on the island where the flare went up in the air from the Others at the Temple. Richard is confused. Faocke and Ben exit the Jacob cave. Faocke tells Guyliner that it is good to see him out of the chains, then sucker punches him. Faocke then announces that he is very dissapointed in everyone. Ooookay.....Real, dead Locke, lays there, dead.

Temple, time. The Others say that they need to speak to Jack seperately. Jack argues, and Sayid awakens. END.

UGHHH!!

Thoughts:

+ Lost is always good, because it is Lost. We get to see what could have happened if there was never an accident. We got to see Boone, Claire, and Charlie!

- Srsly, WTF?? WTF?? Really Carlton and Damon. Really?

NEW POST

2010-01-26T11:14:00.000-08:00

I should say something,....but I don't have much to say....ALAS, I do suck at blogging....

WAIT!! LOST IS ALMOST HERE! Whoot whoot.

Seriously....

2009-12-29T21:33:00.000-08:00

Seriously Janet, put down the computer and go to bed. What is wrong with you? Go the eff to bed, seriously. Even the dog is looking at me like, "Momma, we have to sleep now."

Ugghhhh

2009-12-15T20:01:00.000-08:00

I am tired and I am cold. Ugghhh. I am also in pain because I fell over one of the freaking baby gates I use to corral my animals.

If you've ever been to my little apartment you know I utilize these baby gates, to keep the animals out of the kitchen and Sydney, the dog out of the cat box. Well, stepping over the lowest baby gate ealier this evening, I lost my balance and fell right on my knees. Both of them. I hurt! Ughhh!

Yesterday was indeed a VERY good day.

2009-12-09T12:13:00.001-08:00

December 8th....

2009-12-08T16:29:00.000-08:00

So it's been some time since I've written anything....but there's been many reasons for this. Some reasons good, and some not so good, but never mind that. Here I am writing, that is what is important.

Today is December 8th, in case you didn't know. This date can mean lots of things to many different people. For instance it's the day after the day that will forever live in infamy. It's also around the day that the DC Capital Christmas tree is lit. And even more, December 8th is like a fellow bloggy friend's Christmas. (Seriously, Lula is a blog goddess, check out her stuff).

But these are not the reasons that pulled me out of my self-imposed blog ban.

One of the reasons, I am not even sure it IS. When it IS, I will surely come here, FB and send out emails that what I have been waiting and waiting for ages and ages, finally IS. I hope to hear word about this dramatic announcement, before the end of the week. Stay tuned...

Another reason, is that it is one of my fav blog's (yes, that Twilight Blog) 1 year Anniversary. Why would this bring me out of my blogging prohibition? Well, that crazy ass Twi-Blog has been a god send for me in my life at the time I needed to laugh the most. So, like both UC and Moon do everyday, today I write you a letter.

Dear UC & Moon,

FUCKERY! Yes, I started my letter to you with my fav curse word. This writing your thoughts and thankfulness is hard (that's what she said). I found your Letters Blog via one of those informative Twi-blog's that was mentioned in a WashingPost article about what is IN for 2009. Your blog was mentioned and linked to, in one of the informative Twi-Blog's posts, and I went to take a gander. From day one, I was hooked. I've looked and looked but can't seem to remember when or where I read the the first post. Fearing for my lack of funny, it took me even more time to make a comment. But, irregardless, all I knew was when I found your blog, I was "home".

After seeing the movie and reading all the books in some short amount of time, I was feeling very embarrassed of my 30 something Twi-session. It seemed even those friends of mine (I'm talking about you book club) that also read and loved the series, didn't want to discuss my love for that one quote, the awesome hot kiss in the movie, the background alleged rumors of the Twi-cast while filming, etc. And most importantly, no one wanted to make fun of my new found obsession with me. That is until I began reading my LTT and then LTR.

You see at the time I found the blogs. I was going through my first holiday season post separation from the wasband. I was depressed, lonely, sad, and looking for anything to take my mind off of it. Of course Stephanie's Twilight and people to discuss it, fulfilled this need. Laughs, and laughs, and laughs, and some tears later, here I am.

The girls who write these blogs are responsible, for many others' happiness, growth, and laughs. But they are also responsible for fostering many new found relationships. At this time, I have met at least one of the ladies who writes these blogs, and at least 10 others who I have met solely because of these blogs. All the funny and friendships these girl's foster everyday, make them truly special, to me and the many others whose lives they touch everyday. Not many people can touch so many and cause such wonderfulness, and I know they both feel truly blessed to contribute so much.

I am very thankful to have stumbled upon this fandom, to have fostered life long friends all over the world, to have visited cities and experienced new music, all of which I may not have been able to do without the two ladies, I call UC and Moon, or Noreen and Bunny, or ___ and ____. (FYI - people online use many aliases). Thank you so much and Happy 1 Year Anniversary!

Your Twi-lawyer Forever,
Jane Trigs (like I said, aliases)

PS to my "Real Life" friends....you all will also always be my real life "home". Thank you for dealing with me and my Twi-ness. However, I know you all would agree with me, I have become, more confident, less depressed, and in a happier space since I found my bloggy pals. Many of you have even met and laughed with me as I've hung with my bloggy friends. Today, I am thankful that I have been able to add even more blissful people to my life.

PPS Let's Do This!

Live LOST Blogging....SEASON Finale and LIVE Twitter

2009-05-13T17:52:00.000-07:00

Okay, you all are gonna think I am effing crazy, but most already know this. I am going to try to do duel geeky computer stuff tonight while watching LOST season finale. I need to LIVE blog to LOST because it's what I do. But I also need to help out my LTR ladies with keeping #Rpattz in the top 10 Trending Topics on www.twitter.com. If you don't Twitter you probably don't know what this is, but it's like being at te top of the Twitter food chain and you have to keep tweeting #Rpattz without stopping. We've been going on for over 24 hours. So why? Well, it's the Twilight guy's Bday. You know, the one smokin up in the top right corner. Yum!!

So anyhow, I plan to go back and forth to Twitter and to LIVE blog to LOST. Lord oh mighty I am a total dork!

OK, I have 5 minutes to get ready.

Wow, is that wool? What time are we in? Jacob time I think! Am I watching LOST? What or who? Older equipment and tools cooking on rock and eating off a leaf. Ahhh shucks its BLACK ROCK! "You brought them here"? Huh? Are they like Roman Gods? He looks kind of cute, like a God. IT WAS JACOB, the cute one. Ohh and the statue.

Now which era are we in? 1980's maybe? Kids stealing NICE. Stealing lunch boxes. Is about the 80's. Maybe it is 1986? Nope it's the 1990's. And it was little Kate! Jacob saved Kate. How lovely. Baby Kate was a cutie.

Back to Darhma 70's. On the sub, Kate is complaining about Jack. Juliet gave them the stink eye.
Faraday's journal seems to have all the answers. How did he not know he would be shot? Time table explicitness? Huh? How did I miss that? That guy is a total dick. Get that drill started again. Well there goes the world.

3 years later. Going to kil Jacob with Locke. Exciting. I love this part of the island. The rocks. Ben has never met Jacob. Interesting. Is Alpert going to really question Locke about why he is alive? Ohhh, we are killing Jacob to save him. Oh good, finally more from the crazes shadow foot people. Smack friends in face with rifles. Sounds about right for LOST.
They've got a BOX, wonder if it's a magic box. Well, whatever it is, "It's terrific!"

Now, at a funeral. Whose? Sawyer's Mom and Dad? Who?? Oh Look, Jacob to the rescue again. Giving Baby James (I called it) a pen! Who's this counseling Sawyer? FYI - Sawyer did not listen to you. "What's Done is Done." Hmmmm.

Darhma 70s time again. Inside sub. When is the sub taking off? Juliet took over for Sawyer again? I love it when she does that. Oh noes, they are pulling out. Oh Juliet took over. Awesome. Horace can't call you buddy.

Sayid is thankfully there to make sens of bomb info in Daniel's journal. Messing with the bomb. Jack says, yup I know him and don't give up on Locke. He knows.
Locke has male boobies. He just does. Locke is shocked that Ben will do whatever he says. Ben's gonna kill the Jacob, not Locke. Ha!!

What the eff time are we now? Why did we have to watch Nadia die? Jacob why are you an ass? Locke can you ask Sayid to kill Jacob for basically helping to cause Nadia's death. Ok, back to the bomb with Jack and Sayid. Wow hammering Alpert hammer away at the wall. Alpert is "protecting" the leader. Sayid trusts no one. Whose house are they in? Wondering...
"deadly force'. Oh noes. Eff shoot effing Sayid why don't you. Not to worry, he always gets shot.
Ahh Kate, Sawyer, Juliet now would be a god time. Oh good, Jin to rescue.

Darhma 1970. Juliet looks pissed about the banter. Kate Thanks Juliet. Swyer smells a 3 way!
Vincent is there!! My fav! And Benard and Rose. Crazy!! Srlsy, what effing road. There is no road, They are on an island. Let's all go to the Swan. Rose and Benard are retired. They rule in their hut! Listen to Rose break it down. She's like who cares. Bernard sees how pissed Juliet is.

OK, now current time with Locke and Lapidus and the Box. Oh good, they are the good guys. Totally releived. It's Rose & Benards's cabin! Or is it Jacob's cabin?

OK now when? Post current time? OK here's Jacob again. Jacob is asking Alana for help. Picture fell. Someone else has been using it. They are gonna burn the cabin. Hmm. There goes the jungle. Now going to the statue. OMG Jacob is a 60ft flaming man, with his burning cabin (LOST Podcast joke)!

Flannery O'Connor. Jacob reading at hospital. As Locke falls from window. Jacob saves him. How nice you are Jacob. Locke has stupid goofy grin still. Catching breath at old beach. Fab. Ben loves his alone time. Ohhh, describing first Jacob encounter. Ben made up the Jacob. But he is real, for realz. Ben says that's what he does, he lies. Yeah Ben why wouldn't you want to kill Jacob?
Oh, the Baby cradle. SO sad. Oh and a Charlie ring. Ohhhh. Tear. Now, we are reminescing with Sun. Cute. And Jacob was there too and spoke Korean. Freaky.

Darhma 1970s. Kate, Sawyer and Juliet say Hells No! PART 1 DONE.

Current time - Locke and Alpert are at the statue. That is where Jacob lives you know. Duuhhh!

Back to Darhma - Sawyer and Jack gonna talk. They owe it to one another.

Pre-island Jack time, I bet. Jack's Dad says count to 5 and close your eyes. How embarassing. My heart went out to Jack when his Daddy did that. Ohhh Apollo bar. :) Jack's Daddy is a show off. Jack's Dad did put him in a time out. Jack, please believe in Jack. Oh and here is Jacob, on cue.

Back to Darhma 1970s time. Sawyer and Jack time alone. "What's done is done". Again. Jack what is your destiny? Jack is doing this for effing Kate?? Please. Oh good, it's a fight. Awesome. Sawyer don't kill him. Juliet changed her mind Sawyer. Women do that.

Now who the eff? Oh it's Baby Juliet and her lil sis. Two people that love each other aren;t always supposed to be together. Never a truer word said. Sawyer is like, Juliet WTF? Juliet is a jealous B. Juliet is effing stupid.

1970s Darhma again, but with Horace. Well they know they are coming. Kate you are gonna still be pissed. Jack now you are asking about Aaron. Jack is talking everyone into the bomb plan.

Almost time for the incident. Kate is now with Jack.

Dude, Hurley is like I killed people, Srsly. We get to see how he got there. Oh Jacob made him. Strange. This whole video is strange. And Twizzlers!!!! Just like Twilight. Jacob was waiting for Hugo. And now he will talk Hurley into going back to island. You are blessed Hurley!! "Wonderful except for the part where I am crazy." Again, God Bless Hurley!! Just be on the plane says Jacob.

Everything will be fine when Jack changes everything. Jack Rulz! Only 30 more minutes. Oh noes, Sayid is a goner. Sucks! I hope Jack jumps in the whole like a kamikazi pilot. See ya in LA. Jack how you gonna get past Horace??

OK, now back to Locke and the statue. What happened to the statue? Sun ain't taken your shit, Ben. And Locke ain't taken' Richard's shit either. Magical doors that Richard always finds. He is the "Gatekeeper". Ben is mesmorizing by the fire leading to Jacob. Locke's giving Ben his knife, then walking ahead of him. Yikes!

Well, atleast we know what lies in the shadow of the statute that those crazed people were talking about. ARe they already there ahead of Locke and Ben??

Darhma 1970s. The nuke could be the incident. What now? Oh Live together Die alone. Great, there is a crazy amount of madness happening. Incident or not incident. Jack is on the move. How is Jack such a great shot? They all are.

They hit the pocket. Go Jack Go!! Okay, now what? Large electromagnetic field.
And Juliet is gone. Stupid chains.

Current, Locke time. Here comes the MAGIC BOX. Apperently, Richard is Ricarlos. And he knows about what lies beneath the shadow. What's in the BOX?? Who is it? OMG it's Dead Locke or some other dead dude. Now what again.
Is this all stupid Ben's test? To make sure that he follows Locke. They have met in a manner of speaking. But Ben, you have a choice. What choice? Go or leave us to discuss the issues. Ben is pissed. Maybe he will die now. I hope so. Locke is Moses, Ben, just sayin'.

What about you Ben? You go Ben. They're coming.... And Jacob is burning.

Back to 1970's Darhma. Jack is dilirious. Save Sawyer who lost Juliet. Somehow Juliet is not dead. Okay....Cool. She is gonna activate the bomb or beat it to death. OK, Cool. LOST ended in a white screen. I have to wait until 2010. I guess I need a new blog topic.

POSTING WITH ALL MISSPELLINGS!!

Live LOST Blogging....Let's All Go See Jacob

2009-05-06T17:59:00.000-07:00

Oh nooees. Every episode now has someone getting shot? Am I right? Look it's an a$$hole on horseback. It's 1970's time - Yup, Moms you killed him. Uhh, yes we came with him, if you stop hitting me in the face!

30 years when? Huh? What? 30 years before after, I missed it. Well Richard looks the same. Can't tell. John there now too. Ok and now we are 3 years after they left the Island. Your people, my people, our people. Whose people. Richard is an advisor.....For a VERY long time. And he watched them all die!! duh du duuuuu. Stupid Logo.

Okay they get yelled at and stuck in a hut, and Kate and Jack are just talking like nothing happen. "It was not all misery". Now we have the magic of the journal and we can change everything everywhere and for all time. Awesomeness. Why does Kate look so tan a Jack so bloody?

Oh Crap Darhma thugs at it again. Nobody slaps Mr. LaFleur, I mean, Sawyer. Wow, he means effing business. I hate the Sawyer beatings. I can't deal...poor Sawyer.

CRAP!! RUN Hurley RUN!!! Hurley is always looking after his peeps. Dr. Chang is here now. Hurley, "But we asked you first". I love Hurley. What year were you born? Hurley does not know his history. Faraday was right so far, except when he got effing shot! And now Jack & Kate are untied and met Whidmore.

Ok, so seeing Jacob is a problem??? Hmmmm. Going now to see a plane. What Plane? John Locke is freaky deaky! That man, the one you'll talk to, well, that me. This show is moving very very very fast.
Can't believe it's almost 30 minutes until over. Eff.

Magical, Richard Alpert came to help. I love me some eyeliner. Errr shush it, Ben! Actually Ben effing killed me, because he sucks, Richard. You should have let him die before.

1970's Evacuate the island. Dr. Chang is, "lets go." I love that Juliet and Sawyer = Love.
Uh oh. Kate can't swim. Oh no, gun shots. Great...Oh thank god!! That's where he's been this whole time. Crouched behind an effing bush. God bless Sayid.

What is anyone ever going to do? Bee-atch slap her, Sayid. Do it. Why did Kate save him, why? Everyone one on the island dies anyway. What is whose destiny? What is happening? Someone make a decision. Where's Sawyer?

Sawyer always has a plan...those two are crazy cute. And really beat the eff up. What's the plan? I guess it is to say Efff you, Sawyer Out!

Time to swim with eyeliner and Jack. Swim Swim swim. Ohhh it's the pretty waterfall. It's the temple. And they are in the tunnels. Wow, someone talked some kind of smartness for half a minute, "No, Jack. Not through the pool. It's a big bomb."

Back to John and his others in his "present time". John's gonna break it down to everyone now. "Okay, everyone, follow me to Jacob." Murmurmurmerrrrr. John Locke will be trouble. And that is why Ben tried to kill him.

Marching to the sub sub sub. What's a real world? If Sawyer leaves the show right now. I am gonna freak the eff out! And Kate has to ruin everything. Stupid Kate. If looks could kill, Juliet just shot Kate. Very official sub activity. All quiet. Sub leaving.....

Okay back to Jack. Wow, good point Sayid. Why do you trust Ellie? Okay, here's the bomby bomb. Now, what? Just what I was thinking...

Now Locke's troopers are a walking. Hahahahaha. We're going to Jacob so we can kill him. Of course we are. WTF???

To Sum up ->> WTF?? No words. Just WOW!!

Live LOST Blogging....Baby Dan, Baby Charlotte & 100th Episode

2009-04-29T18:08:00.001-07:00

Oh Nooes! Desmond has been shot. Baby Charlie is adorable. Oh, it's Mrs. Hawking. She is NOT the mother of Ben Linus. Her son is Danny Dan.

30 years back again. Dan + Miles = win. Faraday has been in Ann Arbor, Hmmm. "How did you get back here?" Dan says, oh and by the way, my Mom was WRONG.

Whooooaaa LOST turned into STARTREK. Weird.

Is this baby Faraday? Perhaps? Yup. Looks like he was once a kid. Good to know. Ohhh he hair braces and everything. Moms talking about Destiny. Mom has job? Darhma? WHoooaaa Daniel is gonna "make time". Can you say foreshadow?

Back at 1970's Darhma, Headed to the Orchid. Phil's an ass, Sawyer. Just get rid of him. Waiting waiting waiting. Mile's Dad and Dan meet and greet. Oh, we saw this before.

Evacuation?? Swine Flu? Oh wait no eletromagnitic. "I'm from the Future."

Mile's Dad is now totally going to go bisirk. Miles here is your son. Awwww He is gonna save baby Miles.

Dan, graduating. Now, eating. Mrs. Hawking is kind if bitchy. Is she Ellie from the past? Did we find that out? Well, I guess it is obvious. Whidmore gave him a grant to do research. Grooviness.

Whattayou want Mom's? Ohhh a present. The journal? Is she dying, why is she leaving and saying, good luck? Yup, journal.

Back again to 70's. Parties over people. Sawyer is breaking it down. What do we do?

Hurley ->Wishy washy. Uh oh...Knock Knock. Daniel? Twitchy. hehehehe

Deep breathy voice, Daniel speaking, wants the hostiles. One of them is Mom and she can get them off. Brilliant.

Commercials. Uggh. FYI - Grey's Anatomy looks GOooooOOOD!

Ohhh we get to see who was talking to Dan, last season opener. Daniel can't remember anything. Whidmore, visiting Dan, he offers a NEW opportunity for Dan = go to island, again. Weepy Dan. What if, Dan What if?? Whidmore DID put it there. Ben wasn't lying about that!!

Whidmore is breakin it down to Crazy Dan. Dan's mind will be healed. (That island is awesome. Shell should go there.) Whidmore sounds like Dan's Mom, because Whidmore is Dan's Dad? FYI --I've decided this.

Fonzi times!?!?!?! God, love Hurley.

We don't belong here.....Uh ohhhh. Juliet is PISSED!! She was like, don't call her Freckles, Dammit! 1970's Dan, where are you going? Ohhh Charlotte. Baby Charlotte is VERY cute. I want her hair. Maybe I can change things.... YES YOU CAN, DAN!!

Great now there is a show down, at the motor pool. Run run run! Nice shot there Jack. Sound the alarm!!

Piano playing....Dan still remembers, kind of. Moms is here. It's Mom's business to know. Mom says TAKE JOB! Crazy Dan, says No. Magic Island can make it better, all better, crazy Dan.

Awwww, "will it make you proud of me?" Tear. He's a go, for island trip.

Back 1970's. Takin' jeep to the outside line. Entering the code. Just a scrap. Faraday is now telling it like Miles was. This is our now. OK, let's go find the others. I love the Darhma outfits on them. Juliet wants to make sure La Fleur has back.

Oh noees. They are all pissed at Sawyer. Black Darhma uniforms = mean, stupid men with guns.

So, Why your momma an idiot? Because of this one accident, the hatch will happen, then the plane crash. Because of this, than that, than this....blah blah blah. Ok we have said, whatever happened happen has been said twice. Variables need to looked at, people are the variables.

Wow, Super Dan can do anything! Kate is like so, how? Oh, by exploding a bomb, that's how. Got to go find JUGHEAD. Dammit, commercial.

Back to the first scene in the show. FULL CIRCLE. Mrs. Whidmore, does not know anything now. Oh Desmond is in recovery. Good! Desmond says, he promised not to leave again. Awww kisses. Whidmore enter stage left, Desmond is alright, says Good.

Sacrifice. Oh, it is his son. SLAP!! I think he still wants Eloise.

1970's now. We are all used to insane. Insane = GOOD LOST. Oh, here they are at the camp. Wish him luck. Go Dan nutso. Wanna talk to Eloise. Oh good, it's eye liner. Where is that bomb? Oh great, no more Dan. Who are you? Oh, I am the son you just shot.

Great LOST, next week looks great too!

Best Part - of course Hurley's Fonzi references and seeing all the stuff in the past that we were like WTF?

Worst Part - There wasn't any. That was the best!

Live LOST Blogging....O 6, Take 2

2009-04-22T18:00:00.000-07:00

Voice over guy, sounds pretty freaky.

Story of Oceanic 6. Exciting. Is this going to just be this guy's voice and tons of stuff I have seen already. Cause if it is, I'll watch it, but, Live Blogging might be off.

Okay, so far just a lot of explanation.....

Can't live blog to this shizz. Will just watch it. Educational but not bloggirific enough.

Random Tuesdays....Chewley and the Hillls

2009-04-21T18:11:00.000-07:00

So more random thoughts to write out, but all one liners (or close to):

1) I named my new fake BF, Chewley. I think it's a cool name.

2) Am excited that I entered the Twitter universe but wish that I had an IPhone now.

3) My dog has gotten me out of speeding tickets. She rules.

4) The guy on Fringe is pretty freakin' hot. Not Pacy, the guest star bad guy.

5) Can't wait to do the Breast Cancer Walk at the end of May.

6) I have a new vicious strain of jealousy flowing through me lately.

7) Have only one more Sookie Stackhouse/True Blood book to read before Book Club next week.

8) I had a 5o cent Dunkin Donuts Iced Coffee today thanks to my resident, "Deal Finer/Baker/Martha effing Stewart", Mekana.

9) Still haven't gotten vacuum fixed. Effing vacuum and pet hair again.

10) I'm still not ashamed of my TMZ, HHH, or Twilight addiction, the Hills watching embarrasses me a wee bit though.

Live LOST Blogging.....Miles "Gift" and Hurley helps George

2009-04-15T18:00:00.000-07:00

What the heck, am I watching? Is this LOST?

Ohhhhh Miles! Baby Miles is freaky. I like him, he found some dead guy. Mr. Vonner. He was screaming for Kimberly. Oh, Baby Miles must seem crazy. Maybe he gets to go into the Institute with Hurley. Miles is helping Kate & Sawyer.....I think. Ohhh Sawyer calls him, Little Ben. Baby Ben is better.

Circle of Trust, No Questions asked. I dig the circle of trust, but did the tape get fixed? La Fleur's busy. Body Bag, huh? Miles can tell what the accident was and how it happened. Miles talks to dead people like the little kid in that movie with Bruce Willis.

Hard hats to carry a dead body, weird. Do we get to hear Miles actually talk to the dead? Yes, but we do not get to hear them answer. Dammit.

Teenage Miles. Crazy. Luuvv the Mohawk. Are they in England? No, it's his mum. Miles looks a bit like a skunk. Miles' father blows. Sucky father. His body is on the island??? Maybe..."The package" = the corpse. Dr. Chang = Miles Dad?? Who knows.....

Hurley rocks. Hurley + Miles also Rocks.

Kate now talking with Juliet. Oh crap Ben's Daddy is peeved and going to security. "Here we go..."

Hurley's writing in a composition book. Luv the interaction between these two. Hurley is crazed about his sandwiches. Uh oh, he's gonna find the dead guy. "Dude there's a body back here." Miles CAN talk to dead people. Hurley is so perceptive.

Look its the Otherton village disguised as an "off island" place. He's selling his services to football player's daddy. Gosh, he is ruthless. Cost extra. Miles, geez. He's going to like read his palms, ha!

LOOK it's Naomi. Groovy.

New Otherton was such a cheery place in the 70's. Except for crazed, drunken Roger. He'll die soon anyhow. Luv Kate's 70's clothes, bell bottoms, ROCK. Roger doesn't appreciate them.

Miles/Hurley, YES! Hurley actually sees the dead people, Miles senses the stuff about the dead people. They are both nuts. Hurley calls it, "his Power". Awesome!

Wow, look what they are building!!! Polar Bear feces, Ha! Wow, Dr. Chang is a douche! Crap, he is Miles Dad! I am toadly on it today.

Going to a restaurant....Miles has an audition. Dead body in the kitchen, hope I never eat there at that restaurant. Miles does his thing....Felix, Delivery to Whidmore, Photos of empty graves, and purchase order or an old airplane. 1.6 million dollars!! Woohoo.

Miles/Hurley = more goody. Now what...going to other station. Body gone, hmmmmm.

Jack helping Roger now like Kate was trying. Roger is a total douche,--to borrow Hurley's word. Kate has a weird thing for Roger's kid, that Kate....Jack is like back down. Uh oh, now they will all be against Kate and Jack.

Riding back, sans body. Orchid is classified. 3 month old son.....That's your name too, Miles. Hurley is sooooo obvious. Dr. Chang is very authoritative, ohhhh secret road..... VERY COOL.

They're building the Hatch...the one that crashed the plane, Miles.

Miles now pre-island, I think. Crap, he is getting kidnapped. Try to talk Miles out of working for Whidmore. What lies in the shadow of the statute.....What the hell, from last week's episode too?? Miles has a gift, like those from Heroes. 3.2 million = double of what they would pay. Ah ha! Wrong team Miles. Is this a new team? The shadow of the statute Team?

More Hurley + Miles. Miles is breakin' it down. Dad was never around, Hurley, gosh. Ohhhh, Hoth is for Hurley's script for Empire Strikes Back. Hurley RULES!!! Love that he wants to help George Lucas. Why does Sawyer call Jack, Doc, when he is the janitor?

Uh oh they are all looking after Kate and her jibber jabber. Silly Kate. It's a development. Miles didn't erase the tape. Ugghhh Miles, what the hell? "Get some rope". I love wild, punching Sawyer! Only 10 more minutes, NOOOOOOO.

Raking rakin raking. Miles is talking to the Daddy of the football player. He gives back the money to the Daddy and admits to lying. Profound stuff about talking to your son and saying I love you. Nice, Miles.

Miles back at Otherton with Hurley. Still love them together. Bonding over dumb Dads. Too awesome. And another Star Wars comparison to Empire. Yeah! Hurley is my man! But I liked the Ewoks. Tears, Baby Miles and Miles Daddy. Cuteness.

Now Scientists from Ann Arbor, I wonder who.... Faraday??? Yup, of course. "Long time no see".

Thank GOD they pointed out twice, that LOST will be on next week as a "SPECIAL" and then the 100th episode in two weeks. That was for all the people that need their LOST, every week, like me!

Random Tuesdays....Charlotte & Sydney

2009-04-14T18:16:00.000-07:00

10 more random thoughts.....

1) I am terrified of snakes. Always have been and can have snake nightmares pretty easily.

2) I hate staying home from work, but I get sick pretty easily and have realized what my body can and can't take. I feel lazy and blahhhh, but better than this morning.

3) I think that it's weird that I have not had any caffine today. I didn't feel like making coffee at 1pm when I woke up today.

4) Shell and I decided that if we are going to have any other kids (or my first kid) we were going to adopt one of the little baby girls from China who needs a home. I already have named my little one -> Charlotte. I think we are both slightly nuts.

5) I think my dog is trying to tell me something when she sits almost in front of me and just stares. But what the hell is it?

6) I think that I am actually a KStew supporter now. Loved her performance in the Cake Eaters and going to see Adventureland this weekend with Tina. Weird.

7) I have an obnoxious amount of red in my closet esp in cozy clothes. I went in to change after a bath earlier and was astounded by how much red is in there, and how bad the red shades clashed.

8) I need to go to the store to buy more carb friendly foods, like milk, cottage cheese, other low-fat cheeses, more veggies, etc. Tomorrow, maybe??

9) I need to clean the eff out of my apartment. I still need to put the rest of my kitchen back together and get my effing vacuum fixed. I hate my broken vacuum, I also hate pet hair.

10) I hope I feel better tomorrow so that I can work out. I miss it, my body misses it, but when I feel dizzy, treadmill exercise is a bad bad idea. Especially with my clumsiness factor, can you say.....broken finger from doing jumping jacks.

Live LOST Blogging....Home sweet Home, but Dead is Dead

2009-04-08T17:56:00.001-07:00

Time for LOST!!!!

And dammit I forgot to effing work out tonight because I was Blog-sessed on the Internet.

New way to begin, there's a horse. This is very Robin Hood-esque.

Purple shirt, eyeliner, so hot, Alpert. Baby Ben squinting through his eyes at Charles. Young Charles is def more attractive than older Charles W. Ahhhh, Ben first says he wants to be an other, and Charles says something about "them". Is that what he just said. I have to re-wind later. Yup, "just because you're living with "them", doesn't mean you can be one of us." Interesting....Don't know why, just is. Why didn't he say Darhma, or these others here in this camp. Who is "them" in their conve? Probably nothing...

Ohh yea!!! The Locke scaring Ben scene again! Luuuuvvv it! Punch him out, John. Going back to be "judged"....Locke can judge him. Dah Dah dahhh, the Monster. I thought it was called, "smokey". Only by Calrton and others. FYI - see the "smokey monster" pic above.

Oh, back to Season 1 with other characters and beat-up Ben. Ben is such an a-hole. Don't give him the gun. I wonder if Cesar will run the Island like Cesar.

Now when are they. Ohh, Ethan is older. Like 10 years later from when Baby Ben was shot. Oh and the Baby Alex, his "daughter". Run from whispers.......

This show is filled with wack crap. Now when? Oh back to the season 1, take 2, with diff characters. Ben had an office? Ben is as cold as ice and is a bull-esser to the max. Luuuvv it. You have to love that about Ben, you just have to. "Best Interests of the island". Hmmmm an apology, Locke is becoming all the "clever-or". Let's see Ben be judged. Let's!!

For the love of all things holy, Ben. Jeepers. Why ya gotta shoot people? Nice apology, Ben.

I want to canoe! Home Sweet home. Someone else hurt his arm...but who? Ohhh boy, summoning the monster, smokey. All shucks, I love the bold Locke, just calling it out like it is. Look, Charles was the a-hole back then, when Alex was a babe. It's like Ben is Locke and Charles is Ben. Don't you love the cyclical nature. Where is his child? Where is Penny, if Charles is on the island and Alex was already born?

Okay back to the Darhma houses....maybe its Claire in Ben's old house. That would make me smile. I miss Claire. Prob, not. Of course it's just Sun. Oh good, Locke is there, Sun. Too cooool. Toadly awesome. I also love that Locke was all shady, like half in the dark like we used to see Christian in Jacob's cabin.

FYI - for a second there I thought the vicky secret commercial was LOST back on, because they were in the forest with the models.

Back to the stare down. Love LOST for the stare down. Oh good, they explained everything during the commercial, I feel relieved. Does Lepidus have eyeliner on also? I think, yes. Watch your back, Sun. And walk away, hope Lepidus turns into a werewolf. Let's wait for BEN! Fun fun. Oh we get to see in there this time with Ben and his summoning. But last time, didn't it look different. Whateves.

Back at the well, where is the donkey wheel? I like that they get to "flush the toilet" to get smokey out. Now Alex is older. Where is Penny, will we see her? Oh, Penny is off the island with someone. Oh ok. Hmmm, did the island want Alex dead? Ben banished because it's inevitable. ewwww. Time for a time warp, to the "present" with Sun.

Jack must've lied. Have no idea about anything do you Ben. Dead is Dead. Scares the living hell out of Ben, whoa. Oh good, smokey is here, or not. Cute part with Locke coming out of the jungle, and Ben couldn't control him. And Locke just knows everything. Nice reversal. I love Ben but I am almost ready to see him and all his Hot and Cold, dead and gone.

"Present" with Sun and Locke. Oh boy! The dock. Now we get to see Ben hurt Penny or Desmond, or whatever. Ohh and back to Sun's present (my way of describing, the now). Ben hates John knowing. I like it. Oh goody, the temple!!

Yippee!! Under the temple. So excited to see under it. I am sorry, to Desmond. Ben, don't tell me you did. Nooo. Oh let us see......he shot Des, What the eff? Weird, Ben has a soft spot for kids. Crazy. Who would have thought? Little Charlie is the cutest, by the way. Yippeee, no one was killed. Because Des is the bomb. Thank god, Megan and I heart Desmond.

Dammit. 10 more minutes. Why doesn't LOST last longer?

Pretty water. Dammit, he's not a werewolf. Lepidus should totally be a ww. Yalana is crazed. She knows about something. Oh Back to B & J and they are under the temple wall. Coooooll. Is under the temple like the map from the dome wall thingy, I think?? Why is Ben being teary? Don't be teary Ben. Don't believe him either Locke. Dammit. Never trust Ben. Oh, Ben fell. There are ruins and hieroglyphics. What does that mean?Ohhh, here comes smokey. Yum. ohhh, Alex flashbacks.

Look, it's dead Alex. Creepy. Say it, "Yes I will follow him, I swear". I think angry, bold Alex rocks. Also, I guess Ben gets to live. Efff. I am about done with him, but whose kidding who, Ben's character rocks. Ben gets to live and we get to see some more creepy shizz next week. Good LOST week, I'd say.

New Method to remember to Blog...Random Tuesdays!

2009-04-07T09:54:00.000-07:00

So I have decided to institute Random Tuesdays, which entails me completing a list of at least 10 random thoughts inside my head on every Tuesday.

I figure it will help me get those thoughts out and maybe come up with some better ideas for complete blogs, and more than just my LOST live blogs. So, here goes....

1) Why are there so many blog websites? How does one choose when they want to start a blog? I know I chose mine because my "Blog Hero", Stephanie Klein, used blogger to post hers. There is WordPress, Blogger, among others. So confusing. Don't get me started on Twitter...I don't have an I-phone, so difficult to do that all day, when I am not computer attached.

2) I love other people's playlists. Especially when it is crazy good alternative mellow, and alternative punky stuff. I guess those two are my favorite genres.

3) I love it when I have "discovered" things about myself that I know that I like, because I like it, not because a significant other, friend or parent wants me to like it.

What I have found that I like:

- Sci-fi stuff, that is more fantastical, like vampires, wizards and zombies books, movies, and TV shows

- Music categories described above, and 80's remakes

- Purple colored grape flavor, like sugar free grape koolaid, YUM!

4) Work reviews suck! I hate having to talk about yourself.

Significant accomplishments = Um, arriving every day and not wanting to scream when I am over stressed and overworked.

5) Spunk Ransom has HOT suspender pants.

6) Carlton Cuse, always begins his shows with showing someones eyeballs. And he likes Lance Reddick, who plays Mr. Abbadon, the Major Daniels from the Wire, and the head guy from Fringe, a whole hell'uv a lot. And is that a vampire on Fringe tonight?

7) I wish that I could have a tattoo. I am so jealous of body art, but the truth is that I don't think I could ever decide what I'd want a pic of forever. Sydney?

8) I think my security program on my computer is majorly slowing down my computer. It sucks. What do I need to do to fix this?

9) When my animals are all curled up to sleep, they are too effing cute.

10) I am beginning to think that there are either hippos or rhinos that live above my apartment.

Live LOST Blogging....Freckles is Crazed again

2009-04-01T17:51:00.000-07:00

Jin up, grab radio. Phil online, found shot Baby Ben. Of course he's still alive and there is a doctor on the island. Everyone gather together, to search the grid of the island. Ohhh, but it could be one of us. Crank the wench, be-atch. Why, are all the cars blue? Kate met the Daddy of Baby Ben and then saw the shot Baby Ben.

Flashback/forward thing. It's in the 2000's. Luvin' the scrunchi Kate! How did she get to be so motherly? We get to see Kate visit Cassidy for Sawyer. Fade to commercial, or LOST title. Ugghhh!

How does this Cassidy B know about the baby not being Kate's and why did Kate tell the truth to her? Did K give Aaron to the Cassidy B? You know she was lying about Clementine. Horace is crazy suspicious of everyone. I am suspicious of Horace. Watch the three amigos Miles.

Daddy of Ben is concerned now for BB. Ohhhh Sawyer is so effing clever, he knows whose keys were used. GET Jack!!! Such Cheery otherton house decor. I LOVE CURLEY!!! Back to the Future reference. Miles is gonna break it down. But it was confusing, but yet not confusing. Oh, here they are looking for Jack, finally. But Jack says, No. Hmmmmm, show down in the quaint otherton house. Ughh. I hate commercials.

Jack don't let him die. But he does have a point, about the time thing and the fixin' him before thing. New you and old you. Wasn't that said before? Bad guard that Miles. Hey Juliet, did an okay job. Transfusion time. Roger does really start caring and I am starting to feel bad for him. Oh, Roger knows his son, hates him. Tear, again. I do feel bad for Roger, or is he just as manipulative as Ben?A boy needs his mother but, Ben took a daughter from her mother. Hmmm.

Oh they are breakin it down more, Hurley style. Time is not a straight line anymore. It's a donut. GOOD POINT Hurley! Why didn't Big Ben know it was Syiad? Bad glasses, new perscription needed?? Juliet stare into space--> the others, they can help.

Sneaking out the patient, al la dumb 80's movie, etc. GO Kate, be bad ass. I love Kate for her ballsiness. Back to pre-island, post 1st time on the island. We get to see where Aaron was taken. Good. Aaron's indeciveness of what to drink, reminds me of the 'Kins. HOLY CRAP!! Where is Aaron? Oh good. About freaked. Go Kate go kate, get Baby Ben some help help. Uh oh, whose this? Sawyer...good he's gonna help. Gooooooood Sawyer.

Kate, not Cassidy again. Dammit, Clemintine does exist. Kate wasn't surprised....expected the eventual taking of Aaron from her. Kate did take him.....Sawyer broke her heart. Hmmm. Why are you helping, Sawyer? Man, I almost believe Sawyer's fondness for Juliet. Btw, Juliet is pissed!! I heart Jack's tatooes. They are rediculous.

Blahhh. Bonding in the forest with Kate and Sawyer. LUUVVV IT!

Sawyer/Kate not a good thing. Juliet/Sawyer = good thing.

Ahhhhh, the Others! Dammit, only 10 more minutes.

Ohhhh did Kate give Aaron to Aaron's Mom's Mom? That would be awesome. We'll see. Ballsy Kate, just came out and said it. Kate did protect him. But now she's mending her ways. She's brought her a photo. But she better give him to her. Oh good, she is going to! Kate came back to find Claire. Whattt? Not what I expected her reason to be, well, because it's not, but part of it is maybe. Like 10%, maybe 25%.

Back to the island and the 70's. Gosh he seems sexy. Richard Alpert is S-E-X-Y. Eyeliner and all. Can you Richard? Can you save him? Innocence will be gone -> Dammit Sayid you did create bad Ben, you stupid effer. Who is Charles? Where are they going? Where was that rock formation place? One of the stations? Am confused...I LOVE THIS MOMENT!! Locke gets to scare the S out of Ben! Love it!

LOVE: BTTF reference, Miles breaking it down, Kate and Sawyer bonding, Sawyer "doing it for Juliet"

HATE: Sayid not at all seen in this episode, Sayid created Ben, Mentioning of a Charles, Charles, who? Where is Daniel?

14 - 25 more randomness....

2009-03-31T19:06:00.000-07:00

14) I snatched tons of songs from my good friend Coolleen to put on my Ipod and I am still learning, and re-introducing myself to all of the new stuff (well new to me). New bands I have found: Me First and the Gimmie Gimmies, Mary Prankster, Death Cab for Cutie. Old Stuff I remember that I like: Elliot Smith, Garbage, Van Morrison, DEEE-Lite, Everclear (I know, I know).

15) Zack and Miri make a Porno is the funniest movie that I have seen in a very very very long time. But Kevin Smith can make a crazy funny movie.

16) I love making new friends online with my "obsession". When they mention me in their posts, I beam.

17) I also love the fact that I have turned others into fellow "obsessors" or as we like to call ourselves, "enthusiastically fond." Even if the extreme fondness is an outlet to hide what's bothering us, in some cases. But it does give me an excuse to be snarky and laugh at myself.

18) In that same vane, as a continuation of above, I have been feeling down, lonely, and just sucky lately. How can I now decide to be sad about getting a divorce? It's been nearly a year since my separation.

19) My reunification with music has made me think of the wasband. I know, the wasband that I could even miss, doesn't truly exist. He's a piece of "fanfiction" if you will. But, hearing songs that had a meaning, "once upon a time..." make me think about that faker person that I was married to with a fondness (but, not enthusiastic fondness). I'm not crazy and not that lonely. I know he was a mirage, but you know what a song can do to remind you about things. Gahhh!

20) Right now, I am listening to "Hey Ya!" which I think universally must be a "good memory" song for just about anybody.

21) I can't seem to lose weight but, I am only half trying. I diet and exercise for like half the week. But I have given up drinking diet soda, which is HUGE for me!

22) I don't think I could ever give up coffee. I only have about 2 cups a day but I HAVE TO HAVE MY COFFEE!!

23) I hate kareoke, but I secretly want to scream, "Since You've Been Gone" at a kareoke bar near you. Sans, the 'Kins.

24) I am getting my hair chopped this weekend! Not sure how at all, but it should be interesting.

25) I can't remotely have a one night stand with someone (God help me if the 'rents figure out how to read blogs or get on fb), but playing spin the bottle or 7 minutes in heaven is perfectly acceptable in my world. wink wink.

Whew!! Done. That is freakin difficult as all hell. But good practice.

For Catina...25 even more Random thoughts (very Twilight Heavy, sorry)

2009-03-27T08:14:00.000-07:00

So, the viral request/note thing had been going around a month or so ago and my friend Catina and I had discussed how, after you completed the list that seemed at first, so difficult. Later you felt like you had even more to say. So in honor of our talk and the fact that I am known to be rather random anyhow, I thought I would continue with even more 25 random thoughts. Besides, it's a good writing exercise and my live LOST blog sucked this week, so here goes:

1) I love finding new snarky Twi-crack websites, where the Twihards are older, snarky, and are basically creatively sharing a passion while making fun of themselves. Other than Confessions of a Twicrack Addict, which I have spoke of before, my latest muse is the Letters to Rob folks.

2) I feel guilty about being addicted to something that on the surface is so juvenile, and possibly the "in" thing to do right now, but I don't care because it gives me something to laugh about.

3) I bought my first men's magazine yesterday, because it has Robward on the cover and is affectionately known by the Twihard crowd as the RobQ. These pics are truly gorgeously, yum!

4) I accidentally pre-ordered and had shipped to me two copies of the DVD for T. Luckily I did end up selling one to a work colleague. Accidentally ordered both because Borders.com would not let me cancel my order on line even though they had not yet shipped it. Target had the better deal and I thought I could switch my pre-order easily. Was wrong.

5) I recently got my first IPOD and love love love it. Guess what is the one movie I have on it?

6) I sometimes giggle with glee, when I scroll through the "artists" list on my IPOD and "Rob Pattinson" appears in the list.

7) I love lady bugs! I dressed as one for Halloween one year, which was actually the same night I found out that I passed the Bar Exam. Great memory, and lady bugs do seem good luck to me since then.

8) I crave crave crave lettuce. It's becoming a problem. As mentioned before, I take coumadin for a genetic blood defect that I have, which causes clotting. One friend thinks I crave lettuce which contains loads of vitamin K, that incidentally helps with clotting (what I don't want, because I am a super clotter, hence the blood thinner), because I am not supposed to have a lot of it because it counter-acts my blood thinner, coumadin. Its like I only want it because I can't have it, kind of thing.

My other friend said it was because my body is craving it because the coumadin is thinning my blood and the body is panicking and thinking it needs the Vitamin K to help me clot (my body doesn't realize I have a genetic blood disorder, I guess). Anyhow, I LOVE GREEN LEAFY VEGGIES!!

9) Loving green leafy veggies, makes cooking easy for me, which brings me to a blog post/thought I meant to write last week.

10) I almost NEVER cook anymore even though I used to enjoy it. I stopped while I was married to the wasband.

11) Continued thought on above -> Wasband sure gave mixed signals about marriage and our expectations. He once got mad at me for the lackluster meal I made for dinner = grown up married expectation. But then he would want to go out and get smashed doing shot after shot of whatever kind of alcohol his military buddies were pushing = juvenile, non- married expectation. I mean, you can't have it both ways. Either you do married, stay at home things, were you drink at poker nights and BBQs, or you do, "just dating" or "single guy" things and go out to bars, and buy 10 thousand shots for you and all your friends, and wake up hung over as all hell. Of course New Year's Eve is the one night where either behavior is appropriate.

12) Continued thought from above -> I swear I never cook anymore, because I am confused about what kind of person I am "grown up professional" or "party gal/singleton". Aren't there Sex and the City episodes about this?

13) I constantly forget to get up and use the restroom while I am at work. Not because I don't have to go, I just find myself holding it for no reason other than I want to finish one last email, and that turns into one other last email, and another.....My colleagues, remind me and call it Operation B for Bathroom.

14) One of the ladies at LTR wrote an excellent top 10 list of what it is to love about Robward and I thought I would share, because it mimicked my thoughts. http://letterstorob.wordpress.com/2009/03/27/robward/

UC wrote:

1) He's incredibly attractive 2) a great actor 3) a great musician 4) extremely humble 5) He just doesn't give a damn 6) what else is there to do in the ‘burbs (or when you live by yourself) 7) He has a HOT British accent 8 ) He's hilarious & sarcastic 9) He has an “I don’t give a sh*t about Hollywood” attitude and 10) He's so freakin’ hot it’s unbelievable.

**Getting too busy at work to continue for now. Will continue this weekend when I am feeling less Robsessed and get to spend time with my favorite little person, the 'Kins!**

Live LOST Blogging....Baby Ben and Sayid

2009-03-25T17:52:00.000-07:00

I wrote the whole time and then it all disappeared!

But all I can say is HOLY SH---! He shot Baby Ben! I thought that they couldn't "change the future". Isn't that what Farraday had said before. Now what the eff?

Aged like a Fine Wine....

2009-03-20T12:21:00.000-07:00

So one of my good work friends and fellow bloggers, just had her offer accepted to buy a house yesterday. I am very proud and happy for her, but part of me feels a little jealous and green with envy. Another co-worker and I--whose age is a little closer to mine--were talking over our cubicle wall about the joyous news of our fellow, younger, co-worker and were asking ourselves what had we done wrong with ourselves that we were much older and still renting our abodes.

Well, I know my answer, two things: 1) Law School and 2) Wasband.

He had his own reasons why he hadn't yet bought a place, but we kind of kept on with this wallowing conversation and about how we felt we were missing things in our lives that our contemporaries had held for some time. My co-worker tried to compare me to a fine bottle of wine that is not yet "ready to be opened, still waiting." I, immediately told him that if I was wine, then I was the grapes that had just been stomped on.

After much more of this discussion, my little group and I decided that perhaps last year I was the grapes that were just stomped on and that now, maybe I was the grape juice that was inside the dark oak barrel, still simmering or whatever wine does, before its bottled.

The analogy seemed the best way to describe my currant situation, and I am not sure why. I know I am not at the point of being so recently "crushed", but I also know that I am not quite ready to be on the store shelf, the wine makers' bottling rack, ready for shipment, or on someone else's rack still awaiting perfection.

I also liked the idea of being locked away in a dark, wooden barrel, in a musty basement somewhere. Mostly because it felt very spunk ransom, edwardian, for me to be there, not quite gleaming in new found happiness. Not just yet.... Soon.

More Live LOST blogging....Buckle Up

2009-03-18T17:53:00.000-07:00

Airplanes can stall in the air? Effing crazy. Wonder if the "monster" will suck up and eat the annoying co-pilot. Why did the LOSTies never find the freaking runway?

Oh good, the Island took out the annoying co-pilot. Cesar is cool. How is Sun stuck here? What the Eff? And why is Ben not more beaten up? Wasn't he among the "injured" before?

So they are 30 years separated. Is this the first show that has had a true connect to the previous aired show, in a while? I mean the last show two weeks ago, ended with one of the first scenes on this weeks show. I think so. They have been jumping on and off island or with LOSTies or Others, between every other show.

Darhma jump suits??? Uh oh....lots of stuff has happen since you have been gone, like its 30 years before. My birth year, 1977!!! Good year to pick!

FYI - I found Micheal...he is not dead, he is on the "Usuals".

Bring 'em in! Didn't come back alone....Oh no. Jin is going nutso. My new lady (or old lady) has taken your place, Kate.

Boy, they sure trust James, Miles, et al. They get to do the island surevelliance and security. I think I like Sawyer more scruffy and less James.

Jin is being VERY forceful. He's going to take the man out. I enjoyed, his "model" by the way. Jin=Quan.

Poor poor Sun. How much does this other new lady look like Ana Lucia? Oh Wow, this is like LOST show #1. You go Sun, you follow that evil SOB. Creepy creepy guy. He is such a creepster, that Ben. He should be in the Volturi. "You wanna come?"

I want to know who the baby is! Oh, ok he's a dead baby. Stupid Ethan who takes Claire later and Charlie has to kill you.

Sawyer's Back!

Toadly have to listen to Sawyer. He is the poo. Whoa, Jin is seriously going crazy in this episode. So determined. Oh wow! It's Sayid. Don 't talk Sayid!

Hurley is back in his VW Blue Van. I really love Kate's top! ooooooo, meet and greet video. Can't wait! Hey, Sawyer just said, SOB! And, on cue, here is Ben the SOB.

Ok, let's all take a row trip across the pond....main island ahoy, maties. Oh come on, you know that they'll go, stop talking about "Trust". Do you wonder if Lapidus ever turns into a werewolf? I hope so....oh, that is how Ben gets more hurt. I love when Sun lies.

Oh, I love the initiation video! Peter Chang is the coolest. Did Juliet do that on purpose? Makes Kate a little "suspect" now, to that other check-in guy. Juliet, don't act like Ben. Man, this "quick Draw" guys is a SOB also. Boy, it sure gets dark around here fast.

I hate that Sun calls, Jin "Her Husband". He has a name. Oh good, the monster thing is hanging out or maybe they will run into Claire? Oh look a light! and is it the Dad? Of course it's Jack's Dad. Oh Eff!! Follow him, where.....Stupid commercial.....

7 more minutes!!! They are back in the freakin shack. Showing off class photos. Where's Claire? Look at Sayid cool updated clothes? Purple shirts = 2007. Oh, Sayid is back in a cell. Poooo. Poor Sayid. He is going to go ape shit.

See, even Sawyer hates James. Where did Juliet get a hair straightener? She looks awesome. Jack is like, I am not a worker. No, Sawyer is calling him a "reacter" and Sawyer is a "thinker". Ahhh shucks, Sawyer is in charge now. La Fleur is HOT! Kate thinks so also.

Sandwich delivery from...Ben I believe. Yup. Even little Ben is creepy, maybe he should play Alec.... Ahhhh Bad Robot already. Pooo, but next week looks GOOD!

Remembered to Blog, but....

2009-03-12T18:12:00.000-07:00

Not quite ready to suss out the thoughts that I had, but it was about food, cooking, and the microwave. But, I am a little crazy about "The Office" tonight.

Best word, "fetisized". Is that a word? Megan, did I spell it right?

P.S. They had Twilight on "Kath & Kim" tonight and not just sitting on a table or on a shelf. How sad is it that I was excited about that? Until tommorrow......

I really had a good blog to write, but...

2009-03-11T19:52:00.000-07:00

So, I did have a good blog to write, but, it's late and I want to go to bed early tonight, if I can...

Besides, LOST wasn't on tonight. What is that about? Total CRAP!! Ughh! Until tomorrow, enjoy these Kelly Clarkson lyrics, dedicated to my 100% friend, so that she remembers about people that 100% suck!

P.S. Make sure you picture, the four-year-old Mollykins singing it at the top of her lungs to make you smile even more.

Here's the thing we started off friends, It was cool but it was all pretend
Yeah yeah Since you've been gone
You dedicated you took the time, Wasn't long till I called you mine
Yeah Yeah Since you've been gone
And all you'd ever hear me say, Is how I pictured me with you
That's all you'd ever hear me say
But since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so movin on Yeah yeah
Thanks to you, Now I get What I want, Since you've been gone

How can I put it? you put me on, I even fell for that stupid love song
Yeah yeah Since you've been gone
How come I never hear you say, I just wanna be with you, I guess you never felt that way
But since you've been gone, I can breathe for the first time, I'm so movin on
Yeah yeah, Thanks to you, Now I get what I want, Since you've been gone

You had your chance you blew it, Out of sight, out of mind
Shut your mouth I just can't take it
Again and again and again and again

Since you've been gone, I can breathe for the first time, I'm so movin on
Yeah yeah, Thanks to you (thanks to you)
Now I get I get what I want I can breathe for the first time, I'm so movin on
Yeah yeah, Thanks to you (thanks to you)
Now I get (I get)You should know (you should know)
That I get I get what I want
Since you've been gone, Since you've been gone, Since you've been gone

100% Friends & Fun

2009-03-10T19:08:00.000-07:00

Don't even get me started on 100% sucking...anyhow, I had a 100% great time this past weekend. The girls and I went out for the first time since my birthday in September. Shell was feeling up to it, as was I. We only stayed in the Loudon area, but we hit one of my favorite places, the Clyde's in Ashburn, a.k.a., some crazy farm house with sleds hanging from the ceiling.

We talked to the locals, met nice people, drank some drinks, I had my "Janet" drink, the "BEST DRINK EVER!" And all and all very exciting and not too shabby for our first time out in a long while. The next day however, was not that great, as usually the case when one drinks too much. But what are you gonna do? I am happy that we all had a 100% great time.

Next, on Sunday at brunch, three of the Brunch gals, met at our place, where we talked 100% trash for an hour or so. Twas great and 100% informative, although I learned and heard some discussions that I only wanted to hear about 0% of. So blah blah blah....Its great to have 100% friends to make you laugh.

Speaking of a 100% friend, THANK YOU, Jodie! I enjoyed that Ting Tings song so much, that I downloaded the entire album. Please people, I need more suggestions. Feed me 100% good music!!!

HOW TO BE and more Spunk

2009-03-09T19:50:00.000-07:00

Shell and I went and saw "How to Be" at the DC Independent Film Festival. It was pretty good, not great, but very quirky and artsy. But, you know my teenage obsessed mind only wanted to see it to enjoy the Spunk Ransomness.

Okay that is not entirely true. We had an awesome time and it was my first film festival. Very cool. I contributed to the DC art scene.

Overall though, it was good, and was a good end to a fun, long, exhausting weekend. Feeling way to tired to expound on the weekend at this time, but for now....Shell, how can you not consider this face, HOT? And yes, I feel like a 16 year-old. But, content...

Preview of "the movie"

2009-03-05T19:35:00.000-08:00

Got my IPOD today. In the middle of uploading my limited CD collection to the thing, I checked my favorite twicrack site, incidentally called, "Confessions of a TwiCrack Addict" and found a preview of the Extended Scenes from the soon to be released DVD.

Maybe it was the wine talking, or the spunk ransom hormones building in me (I mean just look at that face), but I told Twicrack that I thought I was in love with her and jealous for all her contacts. But she told me earlier today she was jealous of my getting to see "How to Be" this weekend, so we are kind of even. Kind of.......

I love my Ipod to btw. Like I said, I am into music now. But I need help with music. Help?

PS I also stole the picture from her that she stole from Bostonia, who stole from Blast Magazine.

Mr. La Fleur

2009-03-04T18:09:00.000-08:00

After walking my treadmill for 30 whole minutes, listening to my workout mix-yup, I am into music now-, I sat down to enjoy my "treat" and other addiction, LOST.

First scene has my Sawyer, in a jumpsuit looking mighty hot, named Mr. La Fleur.

Tell me how is Elizabeth Mitchell (Charlotte) still listed in the credits when she died two weeks ago. Ohh they call Sawyer,"Jim". Think the baby is little Charlotte? Poor little Daniel....

When did these guys become such good shots? Shooting practice, after Latin class for the LOST, others.

Does Jim look more buff? Maybe its the muscle flexing carrying the dead guy. Amy's such a trickster. Did they ever stop and think that the reason that the babies dying issue is because of the radio active fence they keep crossing? Oh blessed, it's a boy, everyone is good.

I love Hippy Horace. You are NOT Darhma material. Me either....There she (Charlotte) is, ohhhh Daniel's imprinting. La Fleur means flower. Weird, that Alpert never ages....or changes his clothes.

Yummmmm, got my red wine. :)

Eyeliner...glad someone said it. Amy is nuts. What is her Darhma job? Amy is fishy, I tell you. How do so many people have this curly perfect hair. Where is the humidity frizz?1974!! I wasn't quite here yet either. But 3 years later, I was. And so were Sawyer's hormones and lovey dovey-ness, apparently.

I love the sexy Sawyer glasses. How's your head....It's been said twice in this show. I wonder who the baby boy was (is)....Anyone we met? 3 years since he was with Kate, ahhhhh. Guess 3 years is the magic number, good to know. North Valley??????? Dah, dah, dah....

WOW!!! It's gonna be Kate!! And the rest,...but all he cares about is Kate.
WHY DO I HAVE TO WAIT 2 WEEKS TO WATCH MORE!!! Ughh.

Live LOST blogging makes me more of a dork, but less of a Twi-crack alcoholic I think. :)

So....

2009-03-04T14:16:00.000-08:00

I've decided to change my blog title and start over, because I suck at blogging. I keep forgetting to do it, or rather, don't make time to do it. But don't feel bad, I have not been taking the time to exercise either.

On the other hand, I am a Twilight aficionado. Ask me any random, twilight, spunk ransom question, or about other recent vampire literature and I can tell you about it. About those mindless things, or about LOST, I am nuts. Or, to put it more properly, toadly crazy....

New SpringWidget

2009-02-18T19:36:00.001-08:00

Get this widget!

Can't Write....

2009-02-18T18:02:00.000-08:00

Can't write LOST is on. But I am writing during the commercial breaks. It's good, as it should be. I love LOST! They're back!

Just stopping in to write to myself and those out there that read this freakin' thing to say that alas, I did work out, even if it was for only 20 minutes on my treadmill in my apartment. Although, to be fair, I should be aloud to count the 10 minutes it took me to maneuver the blasted big piece of crap, so that I could plug it in and lay it out in a workable manner. As usual, Syd was very curious and eyed the contraption with a longing to get back on it again, or at least that is how I interpreted her big, teethy dog grin.WAIT, the show is back on.....

Besides, the working out and re-arranging my apartment so I can utilize my treadmill, this is the first week, that I have actually eaten healthy and watching everything that I eat. I have been writing it all down so that I can monitor what exactly I've been doing to make me so blimpish. Anyhow, I am proud to say I lost 3 lbs. Not too shabby for a first week. Ahhh...LOST back on...

Next week, I am gonna try out my friend's gym that is right down the street to see how I like their classes and the like. Should be fun. I haven't been to a real gym in forever. I love work out classes. Its the greatest, kind of like Mrs. Hawking!

In other news, I completed and filed my taxes all in one day! It's much easier to complete your taxes as a single, no dependent. Okay, married filing separate, but you get the point. I can't wait to spend that refund check! I am buying new running/walking shoes. Maybe I can do that half marathon one day after all! Oh, back to LOST..... talk later.

More Obsession Speak, Moving On

2009-02-17T18:44:00.000-08:00

It seems that I have had too much going on to keep up with writing. Too many re-readings of my Twi-crack, too much TV watching of my fav shows, like LOST and Big Love, or too much time searching the Internet for more New Moon Casting news (also part of Tw-Crack). But no, those obsessions are not the real reason for my lapse in writing, although definitely part of it.

More than these obsessions, are the things that are going on right now with my job, that have caused me to need these distracting obsessions. I have been working between 50-60 hours a week, and still have more work than I can possibly get done. When I finally get home, all I want, all I need, is "my own kind of heroin".

What is worse then needing these mindless distractions and obsessions, is that the Twi-crack obsession is slowing waining thin. It's difficult to to admit that my Twi-crack crazy is running out. I am scared to admit this ridiculousness, because I am worried about what I am going to do with all of my boredom and loneliness without having something to obsess about. It seems scary. It also seems obnoxiously annoying. I guess we all need something to get us through new transitions and uncomfortable times.

On a happier note, I have actually begun working out, and dieting again. I am slowly manipulating my obsessions into that new preoccupation. It's keeping me a little more busy. It's keeping me from over loading on Twi-crack, kind of. Is it bad that two friends have given me new books to read in the past week? Thanks for the hint.

25 more Random Things about Me!

2009-02-03T08:03:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, Shell was shocked that I could come up with 25 random thoughts, but I think that this is a great writing exercise and it is getting me to continually write so I am going to keep going until I have a full concise thought to get out.

1. I passed the Maryland Bar Exam on the first try! Yet, I don't practice in a courtroom, but it's nice to know that I always can.

2. I have to wear hats at work frequently to keep my body temperature up. Taking blood thinners in the winter time, is a B!

3. I blame my coumadin on everything, from my nose bleeds and heavy bruising (toadly founded) and my computer hating me (possibly unfounded).

4. I never thought that I would be working in contracts, but I like most people I work with, I have great job security, and am never bored. Very burnt out, but never bored.

5. I may never be able to have children, although I have never tried, the blood disorder that I have is one of the very few conditions that one can have, which may cause a miscarriage in the 3rd trimester. This pisses me off to no end. But I have never tried and anything is possible, we shall see.

6. I am trying to make my friend have a child for me when it comes time, because her child turned out perfect and she was in so much of a better mood when she was pregnant. It's really best for everyone involved.

7. I don't want to have a child by myself, but I plan on doing just that if I can't find myself a baby daddy by the time I am 41. Don't ask....41 just seems like a good number.

8. I am pretty relieved that I don't have kids at this point in my life because, because I love Guinness and my wine way too much right now.

9. The entire time I was married to my ex-hole, Irish, Marine, wasband, I never even liked Guinness and refused to drink it out at pubs and the like. For some reason now, its my fav. Go figure!

10. I can't bring myself to put Xmas away. It just makes me happy. I love my Xmas cheery decorations. I have taken the lights off my porch so the general public does not have to deal with my inability to put the stuff away.

11. I have been recruiting more people to read the Twilight series, and now people blame me for their lack of sleep. Mustly I like to make people become as obsessed as I am, so as not to feel too crazy.

12. I once lost 40lbs on Weight Watchers and need to remind myself that I do have the ability to lose the weight I have put on by eating my feelings, post separation from wasband.

13. I love working out once I get going, I just have to get over there. FYI - it's another excuse, but in the evening when its dark it's a bit scary to walk over to my apt complex's gym. We need more lights over there, or I am taking my dog.

14. My two animals are named after cities. Sydney the german shepherd and Savannah, the black and white cat.

15. My left leg will always be a bit thicker then my right leg, in the calf/knee area due to the vein damage from my DVT clot. Sometimes there is a one inch difference in width, if I have been standing still for long periods without good blood circulation.

16. I can only take Tylenol or codeine, or stronger. For some reason, Ibuprofen and other pain killers affect the coumadin (blasted rat killer), and only Tylenol is permitted. We all know how Tylenol barely works on mild headaches, imagine being in real pain.

17. I have been in three car accidents. One with Jodie driving, one with Myrna driving, and one with Shell driving. After the car impact, each of their first words were, "Are you okay?'

18. I have the palest skin ever. I once got a sun burn while sitting in the shade of an airport hanger, with SPF 30 on. The sun burn was so bad that I missed work the next Monday because I couldn't wear clothes.

19. Even though I am crazy lonely and sometimes wish to have a significant other in my life, I am determined to just be me, for an entire year after the separation from ex-hole.

20. I can't believe that I am where I am at this point in my life, but am thankful for all that I have.

21. Every morning for the past three, I have woken up very nauseous feeling. Unless I am the new, alternative virgin Mary, I can't be pregnant, but what the hell?

22. I have discovered that I really like sci-fi, but that I am still learning more about shows and books that are out there to enjoy. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

23. I am a champ at senseless calling. In fact, my friends who are driving long distances have been known to contact me to talk because they know that I can carry on a conversation for hours about nothing. My friends also have come to expect that when they ask me what's up when I call them, that I will usually tell them, "Nothing", because I am really just senseless calling.

24. I really want an Edward, but I know that a Jacob would be better for me. Mostly I want to date/be/love someone who treats me like I am a Bella.

25. I am utterly impressed how Stephanie Klein can write so eloquently every day, when I struggle to write small blurbs that are 25 random thoughts in my head.

25 Random Thoughts Survey from FB

2009-02-02T09:00:00.000-08:00

I REFUSE to tag anyone to make them do this, because it has toadly reached viral proportions, and I am just doing this as an exercise, seeing as how inept as of late I have become at consistently blogging.So people, don’t worry about being forced to adapt to the notes feature in FB, just please enjoy my ramblings.

1. I never went bowling until I was 25 years-old. My parents weren’t into it and at some level they believed that bad people hung out at the bowling alley. I actually scored a 22 once in an actual bowling alley, not Wii bowling. It was sad, but funny.
2. I carry a water bottle almost anywhere I go. I am constantly thirsty due to the awesome drug combo I take.
3. Although written about before, I have a rare blood genetic defect that less than1% of everyone in the world has, and as a result I have to take blood thinners for the rest of my life. 4. My best friend that grew up on the same street also has had very rare medical issues and has an auto immune deficiency that is the most rare of all auto immune deficiencies. What was with the water on Lisa Drive?
5. I don’t have a passport and although I once lived 20 minutes from Mexico, I have never been out of the country.
6. Due to 2 different water incidents from my early child hood, I am a bit afraid of the water. I almost drowned when I was 4 after falling into a pool, and my dad jumped in and saved me. Subsequently, I got stung by lots of jelly fish and spent the rest of a family vaca taking pain killers and spreading aloe all over my legs. However, I do like boating, kayaking, and sailing, despite my fear.
7. I can’t play just about any sport, and now have even a better excuse than my overall clumsiness. The blood thinners caution against playing anything that could even remotely cause internal bleeding, head injuries, or other bodily harm.
8. I once broke my right index finger doing jumping jacks, once fell and cut my ear while putting on my pajama pants, and many times have twisted my ankle falling down stairs. Take that Bella!9. I used to share the ownership of a pet frog with my friend Jodie (crap, now you are tagged). I think its name was Hannibal.
10. I can watch any movie and critique it and can even find merit in any terrible movie, no matter what movie it is. I can also repeatedly watch movies over and over, thus irritating those around me.
11. I enjoy living with someone, but like the idea of living alone as well. But I think everyone kind of feels the same about this.
12. I once won lunch for my office. It was great and was supposed to be for a huge, 50 person office, and I only worked at an office of 5 people. We all had leftovers for a full week.
13. I once worked at an office where the owner’s dog came to work every day, even when the owner was away on vacation. His name was Rugby and he was very cute. 14. I have seen Twilight 3 times at the theater and am planning one more viewing. I have read all the books twice.
15. I have seen each Harry Potter movie at least 5 times and have read the last three books in the series twice.
16. I sometimes do wish that mystical creatures like vampires and werewolves were real, although I don’t think they are. But I do believe in ghosts.
17. I usually have to have one chocolate thing every day. Granola bar, hot chocolate, whatever.
18. To maintain my PT INR (blood test to monitor how thin my blood is) I drink one glass of wine a day. Shell can often be heard asking me if I remembered to drink my wine yet. Seriously folks, my hematologist has said, either never drink at all, or you must drink one glass of some kind of alcohol per day to keep the blood levels in check. Guess what avenue I took.19. I love to see famous people, not for autographs or anything else. Just the story of saying I saw them. So far, other than concerts, I have seen, Carrot Top at the airport, Bill Cosby, Spike Lee, and Jessie Jackson at an event in Wash, DC, and President Carter at an event at Univ .of MD.20. I have only been camping twice ever. Once with my mom and bro in KY and once in the CA desert outside of San Diego.21. I have several besties that I have known for a good long portion of my life. One friend that I have been friends with since I was 2, one since I was 8, several since I was 10 – 12, and several for 10 - 15 years. When I find the good ones, I keep them!
22. I cannot remember the names of songs or the names of musical acts, although I can sometimes tell you any movie that some random actor has ever been in. It’s a bit strange.
23. I wanted to go to law school my whole life, which I did and graduated in 2003. I never really knew what I wanted to do after actually going to law school, but I always wanted to go.
24. Although I can be funny, I am nowhere near as funny as my dear friends that are in my life. I think I surround myself with people that not only make me smile, but that can also leave me in stitches.25. I always wanted a dog growing up and I have had the fortunate experience of raising two puppies and caring for a one year old shelter dog. I currently have one cat and one dog. Animals rule!

26. EXTRA ONE - Despite no longer truly being a member of their society, military families and the ties that bind you to them are truly exceptional, and I miss belonging to that society sometimes.

Redemption

2009-01-27T18:18:00.000-08:00

So I haven't been writing as often as I would like to, despite the fact that I know its good for me. However, I have been exercising, so its all relative. My lack of writing is not due to my lack of time due to my new exercise regime, my busy new television watching schedule, my attendance of "couples" parties, or even my twilight obsession.

Just to prove, partially to myself, but also to those who care, whoever they may be, according to this "TOP" source, Times of the Internet, I am not not too obsessed with Twilight. Below, their list describes the Top 10 of the Twilight obsessed. They also describe that if you have 5 or more, than you are too obsessed. I think I don't truly fall under any of these references, or possibly, even stretching it, I may have like two. I will star those few I relate to and take solace in the fact that I am not "too obsessed". So HA!

10) You've memorized every line of the book series (Um.....no)
9) You refer to yourself as a "Twilight Scholar" (Nope)
8) Your screen name is a Twilight character's name (You've got to be kidding me)
7) You spend all day blogging about the movie (maybe like 10 minutes a week)
6) You are set to receive Twitter updates about "New Moon" * (no, but I do perform daily searches)
5) You think Catherine Hardwicke should be the next President of the United States (Wtf, come on)
4) You actually think you have a future with either Robert Pattinson or Taylor Lautner (they are both, like 10, or 8)
3) You just know in your heart that vampires are real* (Sort of)
2) You're sure Twilight is non-fiction (uhh...no again)
1) You have your Google Alerts set to notify you anytime anyone in the world mentions Twilight even once. (nope, but like to look at Twilightlexicon daily).

If 5 or more of these statements apply to you, you may already be too far gone to help. If all 10 are applicable, all we can do is send some good vibes and hope for the best.

Another weekend...Another Party

2009-01-24T09:43:00.000-08:00

Yup. Time to go back to the 'Dorf to celebrate a friend's bday. Time for more butterflies and uncomfortable silences, but as usual its not as bad as I think it will be. I am trying to concentrate on the after part, where I realize that I should not have been so nervous about a silly party.

Again, this party is one of those, with an older crowd and lots of married folks and couples. I am feeling more and more like how Carrie in Sex and the City explained in one episode that being the single friend among the couples, is a bit awkward. I seem to make all the pairs feel somewhat uncomfortable. It's like they don't know what kind of questions to ask me. And when I describe what I have been doing with myself, I can't help but think that they all think I am a bumbling alcoholic or pathetic couch potato.

Oh well, what can you do bout these things. I just have to feel like I have to do whatever I can to keep me happy and to better me. I just hope that all my married friends and friends who have coupled off can realize that I am the same person that they befriended in the first place and that I have more to offer than silly single girl stories. And they better except my ridiculous obsession with vampires and young adult fiction.

Excuses

2009-01-21T05:55:00.000-08:00

Okay seriously, in the evening when I get home from work, I tend to get right back onto my computer after I have been on it all day. I look up the weather, I read Facebook crap, I search about who might be playing Jane, and I look for more interviews from Spunk Ransom, where he talks about how cats die and how he felt accomplished for trimming his toe nails. My use of the computer is quite random, meaningless, and slightly embarrassing. But it has also kept me from writing my blogs.

Not writing my blogs, makes me less in touch with myself and many of my far away "Readers". My blog writing generally makes me feel good about myself. So with all of my random computing and Internet clicking, why do I not take the time to write up something? Seriously, my eyes have begun burning and watering when my Internet surfing turns into my mad, unsatisfied clicking, late into the evening and the thought of writing only makes them burn more.

I wish I could say that I was looking up things on the Internet that seemed worthwhile or interesting, like porn or recipes. But nope, its just become another one of my endless distractions to entertain myself. Well, I have to get back to writing more regularly even if it means that the eyes burn. I have to get back to exercising and possibly beginning school, like I said that I wanted to do so many months ago when I described my goals. Agghhhhh!!

Maybe I am being too hard on myself, but I don't think so. I think I am beginning to get too distracted by my mindless distractions, to deal with my life and the things I need to take care of. I need some kind of plan. That,...or new goals. Who knows.....

Come on and EAT YOUR CELERY, because you are making me feel fat!

2009-01-14T12:45:00.000-08:00

So I have these two girlfriend who both had ended rather bad relationships in the last couple of years, and whose failed relationships were arguably almost as bad as my experience with the wasband. Although neither had been left on the side of a busy freeway, or forced to learn foreign languages, their experiences with their "ex-hole's" (new word sent to me by one of said friends), were definitely awful and are thankfully over.

Recently, both of these ladies have had the luck of finding truly wonderful men that treat them well and do almost "Edward-like" things for the ladies to show their affections. But both of these women are highly suspect of this nice behavior. One of them in particular is truly crazy with suspicions and self doubt and it seeps from every fiber of her being. Don't get me wrong, these women are not using these soulful celery, and they do show their appreciation and devotion, but what gives?

I mean seriously, I am no where near wishing for someone like the same for myself at this point in my life (although perhaps an imaginary one), but I want to tell both of these women to smile and enjoy themselves, but in much harsher language. I want to tell them to revel in the excitement of a new found person that cares about you and shows it. I want to tell them that some questionings are okay, but that if you doubt and wonder about every little thing, that you are not going to enjoy your happiness that you should be feeling and drowning in.

I want to tell these two friends and all the other ladies out there not believing in their happiness, to listen up! You best be happy for me! I want you to calm down and enjoy the fact that someone cares about you for me! Do it, so that I have some sort of proof that there are in fact "Edwardian" men out there, that may not sparkle or dazzle, but that actually act nice and show their feelings. Prove to me that I want to eat the freaking celery instead of the funnel cake. Until you do that, you are the reason that I gained too much weight! Okay, go it?

I have no idea how to juggle!!!

2009-01-12T11:21:00.000-08:00

So the party of course turned out to be toadly awesome as I knew it would. All Myrna parties are awesome!! Makes me wonder why I worried at all. I am just a big ball of worry sometimes. But anyhow, just wanted to warn anyone who enjoys playing Cranium.

If you end up being the puppeteer and you have to manipulate your "puppet" person, in order to make them appear to juggle, please please please be sure to know what juggling looks like. I failed miserably at this, and made it look like the person was milking a cow or something. I am not sure I will live it down, at least for awhile.

Note to self - make sure you know how to juggle before going to next game night. Milking a cow does not look like juggling!

Butterflies and Happiness

2009-01-10T15:11:00.000-08:00

So I am getting ready to go to my friend's game night party. I already know that I am going to be late, but I have been thinking about it all day. This has been one of those lazy Saturdays, where it's been raining all day and I have done nothing but compute and watch old movies.

Why am I going to be late? I think it's because I have been feeling nervous about the party all day, even though there is absolutely no reason for this. I should be and kind of do I feel like a child again, awaiting the excitement of a friend's birthday party, but with alcohol. And I know for a fact that I will have load of fun, as I have always had an awesome time at any event sponsored by Myrna. But still the butterflies....

Oh well, talk to me in about an hour when the alcohol has drowned the butterflies and replaced them with some kind of lurid happiness. There will be laughter, fun, and games, but please don't let there be pictures. The last thing I need is pictures.

Obsessions

2009-01-09T12:20:00.000-08:00

I've decided to just embrace them and continue acting like an 18-year-old that is in love with love. It's a little crazy, but it seems to be working for me at this point. It has distracted me from feeling lonely and isn't that what all good "entertainment" is supposed to do?

Despite getting that gooshy feeling of loving-ness from being a Twihard, I have also remembered a past obsession with Titanic. Maybe its just things that begin with the letter "T". Who knows...but speaking of things with T. I think that the same thoughts that I had at the beginning of my rekindling with "T" or wasband, were brought on by the same obsession with love. I am not sure there was real, honest love there, maybe just the idea of being in love with love was there.

As I had read the Twilight books, and as I remember my obsession with the Titanic, I think how, I became intoxicated by all the loving letters, the loving expressions, thoughts, presents, etc., that were once presented to me by said, wasband. It was an amazing, thrilling experience to feel so love and wanted by him in the beginning and to have all of things to show for it (Oh, I guess another thing I would have not likely had without the marriage to him, that I could be "thankful" for). But, as you know, look what all those things and promises have got me now. Young Adult fiction.

Looking over the beginning "happy" periods of our "romance" it is easy to see that we were both a little too into being in love with love rather than being in love with one another. The first drunken fight that we had not even a month after his return, should have been more proof of that. (NEED to discuss this at some point I think).Well, that and the fact that he stopped sending me love letters and expected me to learn Arabic.

Okay, need to learn other obsessions! Oh and I get to revert back to my LOST obsession that is less than two weeks away! Woo hoooooooo!

Why?

2009-01-08T05:29:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother....I keep forgetting to blog at night and then keep putting it off. I guess its like exercise, I just have to get back in the habit and then I will keep it up longer. Speaking of which, I need to figure a way to jump start into my exercise routine.

How do you motivate yourself back into burning calories? It doesn't help that I was out sick Tuesday, its been really cold, and I am still having difficulty breathing, due to the congested chest. If only I could somehow turn my Twilight obsession, or even my LOST obsession into an exercise obsession. Ho hummm. Guess, I should start some research or something on that. Not nearly as fun though.

Well, It's About Time!

2009-01-05T13:07:00.001-08:00

So, yeah I have been out of the picture for quite awhile. There are many reasons for my absence, among them the three week period I went without having the Internet at my new apartment, holiday outings and events, not wanting to think about the things that I should be writing about, and....well, something I am a bit embarrassed to admit, despite the fact that according to the Washington Post article above, I am one of those who are "IN", for 2009, as a self professed TWIHARD. So what is this that has me so captivated? It is my young adult-like, 18 year-old obsession, of a 31 year-old, The Twilight Series.

Okay, so I have always been a Harry Potter fan, and I always like to see the kid movies, like the Chronicles of Narnia, the Golden Compass, Christmas cartoons, and the like, but what is wrong with me?

I have done some clicking around on the Internet, feeding my new obsession, discovering some rather hilarious anti-Twilight tee-shirts, while trying to understand my drug. The funniest tee-shirt I have seen, had a slogan stating something like,"TWILIGHT - making Disney's fantasized relationships more real everyday." And alright, I totally agree, but what on earth is it that I am finding in this strange Twilight heroin?

I have thought about this long and hard over my lapse of blogging and I can only think that the idea of having someone become your one and only, is something I think that I am still looking for. Or that, the idea of choosing to become something indestructible and magical, while spending the rest of your life with the one you love, seems just so fascinating. But, when I think about it, and as I have written before in the past, I genuinely like Sci-Fi stories and have enjoyed other Vampire shows (like True Blood, the other vampire obsession).

I think it comes down to the fact that involving myself in anything that distracts me from my own boring, sad, often lonely life, that I am trying to still adjust to, is just plain, right up my alley. Well, that... and I like biting people.

SAN DIEGO

2008-12-01T19:28:00.000-08:00

I am too exhausted tonight to write much even though I did almost nothing when I got home. But tonight I decided to be thankful for getting to live in San Diego, California.

I mean you can't really be toadly unappreciative about living in a perfect climate paradise, that although mostly brown, allows you to enjoy short sleeves and nice light jackets all year long. In San Diego, you can go hiking almost any time of year, except for rattlesnake season. You can train for marathons all year long, go camping in the desert after a short hour drive east, you can see the sun set over the water, and can even run 5Ks with you puppy on Thanksgiving.

San Diego, was definitely an experience that I would have never had if I was not married to the wasband, and although I am very thankful to be back on the east coast, I am thankful that I got the experience of living in a place so different from where I grew up. If I had never been married to the wasband, I would have never experienced living in this south western paradise.

Please note for all those that notice how I describe San Diego as being mostly brown. Yes, the water is blue and you can see some green patches in this photo, but please also take note of the large brown, rocky hills and mountains in the background.

Freakin' Finally

2008-11-30T18:52:00.000-08:00

So, I was supposed to be writing all through November about things that I am thankful for that I would not have had if I wasn't ever in a relationship/married to the wasband. However, my freakin' Verizon Internet was not working because the DSL lines in my new place was all crapped out.

Tonight instead of writing more, I plan to rest up for a long week of being thankful and writing about it. Meanwhile, I am exhausted from my quick weekend trip to Delaware with Myrna and the Myrna fam. Until tomorrow....

Sydney

2008-11-11T20:42:00.001-08:00

So, Yes! The wasband finally came for the little boy and I have been without him for almost 5 days. Not to worry about the "transaction". We exchanged the good boy for my goods without having to see one another and all was done. I still miss my special little guy, but am VERY happy to still have my big girl, the spider killer, Sydney.

To share in my joy that is all, the furry, titled head, chewbacca noise making, tail wagging, tongue hanging out, licking, following you around everywhere, awesome hiker, protector, walking/racing buddy, sounding board, and all around women's bets-friend. I would have never had the joy that is Sydney without ever having the marriage to the wasband. Please enjoy these cute cute Sydney pics.

Darwin

2008-11-05T20:38:00.000-08:00

As I have written before, at the end of this week, my beloved short, smaller, black & white bouncing dog will leave me to live with the wasband. I am obviously torn up by this inevitable parting, but have been preparing for his departure for a month.

Nevertheless, I am thankful for all the memories I had with my sweet little guy, even the bad ones involving torn ears and dog fights. I am thankful for your smiling happy face, when you bounce up and down when I come to the door, am thankful for your waggy tail that only relatively recently began wagging furiously in glee when people talk to you, and I am thankful for your perfect sits, while you wait for your love pets.

I am thankful for the short, but full memories of the time that I got to spend with you, and the fact that I saved you from that shelter in Cali. Having you in my life is something I never would have gotten had it not been for the marriage/relationship that I have had with the wasband and I am thankful for every moment and all the happiness that you caused. Marvin-Darwin, this is another blog for you, and perhaps, despite your small-ish size, your influence on me might even yield you one more. Your size doesn't accurately display your huge heart. Love you Marvin-Darwin.

November Thankfulness....

2008-11-04T17:13:00.000-08:00

So to help in my healing process, and in the spirit of Thanksgiving. I have decided to take this month to find some kind of iota of a piece of the failed marriage with wasband to be thankful for. As my triumphant finale, I plan to say goodbye to the relationship, as advised by my crazy doctor.

I am not feeling particularly, unhealthy about the fact that there is no relationship with the drunken buffoon but I am advised by those that are much more smarter than me about these things, that this kind of practice is a good idea. Therefore I oblige.

To begin, my first thing that I write about being thankful for, that I would not have had without the relationship with the wasband, is my friendship with my favorite Marine, Katie.

Katie and her boyfriend came out to visit me last weekend to celebrate Halloween and to visit the city. We have kept in touch over the past two years since I have left San Diego, but it was not until I had seen her this weekend, that I realized how much I loved hanging with her and appreciated her friendship.

Katie and I had many fun times together, watching football in San Diego and making fun of the Chargers' fans, chasing after Syd at Dog Beach, dancing and drinking of many a drink, but the thing that makes me appreciate Katie the most, is her support of me during one of those awful fights between wasband and I that Katie, fortunately or unfortunately witnessed.

Over the weekend, that was actually right before my clot, my friend Myrna came out to visit me in San Diego and knowing how much fun she and I would have adding another friend to the mix, we decided to also invite Katie to go out downtown with us to play. Upon planning our evening, we realized that the wasband was also planning on going downtown in San Diego that same evening to say good-bye to a fellow Marine that was getting out. Alas, the three of us headed to the city in my car, searching for a parking lot where we could leave my car overnight without it getting towed and take a cab home without draining our wallets. We found one and parked the car.

Katie, Myrna, and I had gobs of fun acting silly, dancing, eating Mexican food, and walking the Gaslamp District, while checking back in with the wasband at his "Hole in the Wall" bar, whilst he hung with the boys. Well, for some reason I accidentally ate some guacamole, which always makes me instantly get sick, with or without alcohol being added. The avocado and alcohol mixture in my gut proved too much and we decided that I should head home.

Katie, Myrna, and I explained the situation to wasband and suggested that he could stay and get a cab home separate from us, as we were not thinking we could drive ourselves. But wasband for some reason decided to come home with us and to drive himself. Myrna actually ended up riding back in another boy's car and Katie and I were alone in the car with wasband.

Wasband was drunk, not fall down drunk, but pretty f-ing drunk. Why on earth we did not take the cab, I will never know or understand. Wasband, Katie or my puking self were in no way in driving condition, but the cab was not taken.

The drunken wasband, as per his usual drunken behavior, became irate at Katie and I. This may have been for any of a number of reasons, like we were acting girly and silly, we couldn't figure out which way to take Katie home, because there were different ways to get there, and our all around intoxication. However, his blow-up turned into his screaming at me at the top of his lungs that he was not going to risk his USMC career by driving drunk anymore, pulling over on the free-way (the equivalent of I-395), leaving his sick wife on the side of the road, and him walking away.

Katie, sobered up real fast, tried to calm my crying and sobbing, and even did the honorable thing, by trying to get the retarded drunk person back into the car. Wasband screamed at Katie, called me a baby for crying and being upset, and would not get into the car. Katie drove me home.

Wasband never came home that night. He did however, make it back to the apartment as Katie informs, because she had to call over Chad to come get her. Of course, wasband came back to the apartment parking lot to get into his beloved Bronco and drive off, still likely legally intoxicated, despite his crazed outburst about not wanting to drive drunk and his earlier leaving me on the side of the free-way.

I will never forget Katie's support that night and quick action to get me out of the situation and home to be with my visiting friend. I will always be appreciative of her understanding and support. I further appreciate the other fun memories and future fun times we shall have. I am thankful that my relationship/marriage to the wasband gave me an awesome friend like Katie, my favorite Marine.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN (eve)!

2008-10-30T14:16:00.000-07:00

In honor of my new favorite show, True Blood on HBO, I am going to be an awesomely spooky vampire, sans fangs, for Halloween. I can't wait to sink my teeth into it, Ha! But seriously,....I have a million things to do before tomorrow, like try on my costume, make cupcakes for Megan's Birthday tomorrow, go to the store, clean house, walk dogs, feed dogs, finish laundry, take out trash.....you get the point.

But, of course with a day full of birthday cheer and a night like Halloween with your favorite Marine, pictures will be taken and more will be said. Just think about me tomorrow and hope that my boobs stay into the corset-like part of my costume and pray that I meet a "Bill".

Two Weddings, Wrong Man

2008-10-29T18:44:00.000-07:00

Lazy me! Okay not lazy, I just don't feel like delving into it, but nonetheless have a question for myself and others:

After divorce, what on earth do you do with your wedding photos/wedding album (YES, this is an actual pic from the wedding)?

These are my ideas:

1) Ask mom if she wants to keep any pics as "family" mementos? (She will probably tell me to do what I want)

2) Burn all the photos at an elaborate, good bye to marriage anniversary/clot-a-versary party on November 29th.

3) Ask Tina to give the pics to someone else who has a chrysler, in hopes that when their car catches on fire, that the pics will burn up, from an act of god.

Please, I need help....what do you do with these photos when you are happy to no longer be married to the likely adulterer, drunken verizonite (new word for wasband,....don't ask)? But on the other hand, you still do appreciate the day for what it was, and enjoy having the memories of celebrating a life event with all of your friends.

You see, 3 years ago today, the wasband and I were married the second time. The first time, we got married at the court house (Nov 29th), before he left for Iraq. We were so 1940's. I thought it was romantic and I guess it was, but it just goes to show all those currently fretting over wedding plans out there, that no matter how many times or ways you commit yourself to a person, no matter what kind of wedding you have, it never even matters. What really matters is who the person you marry really is. After the party, after the celebration, after the "honeymoon period", who is that person you married?

Seriously though...What do you do with you freakin' wedding photos? The one attached still has Jodie's hubby in it and several of my favorite marines.

Spreading the Wealth

2008-10-27T18:32:00.000-07:00

A fellow blogger out there that I found posed an interesting question about those that do not want to "spread the wealth around in America." Not sure it completely had to deal with actual political ideal, e.g. socialism, but I thought that the question she posed was nonetheless interesting.

Apparently, the blogger must be one of our beloved food servers/waitress or a friend of a server, as many of us have been throughout our lives. From her question I believe she must have felt the economic pinch of not receiving a rightful "tip" for service. It still shocks me to this day that people do not understand that food servers only make $2.15 an hour, plus tips. Anyhow, the question posed was: if people are so against spreading the wealth throughout America (even though it has been shown to work in the past, i.e. Roosevelt's New Deal), why can't the food servers' tip amounts get melded into the cost of the food at a restaurant?

Not sure I completely agree with the suggestion, as I have had many bad food service experiences. Even my own experience of being a server has not made me think that this concept is entirely a good idea, as I enjoy paying my 15% for "bad" service and 20+% for "good" service.
On second thought,...other peoples' ideas of awarding good or bad service are not at the same levels of tip percentages, as I award.

For some, mediocre service can involve giving only a 5% tip. Perhaps, the melding of service cost into food cost at restaurants could be a good idea and could better yet, possibly help those whose skills excel in the food service industry or even help those who use food serving as a supplemental income.

What do you think?

Too Freakin Late

2008-10-23T20:20:00.000-07:00

Lately I can't sleep and am exhausted at work. I keep laying up at night thinking about stressful work events and other things. Mostly, I am thinking about decorating my new apartment that I move into next month.

I am thrilled that I actually get to and plan on, decorating my new digs. I've chosen curtains, paint for the walls and some other wall decor. Now I just need that freakin dining room table and chairs. Ahhhhhhh!! Why am I so stressed out that I cannot sleep? This should be exciting, not stressful.

Hmmmmm, I think it may be the stress of losing a four legged friend. Marvin-Darwin gets to stay now through November 8th, but his and my inevitable separation is weighing heavily on my mind. Marvin-Darwin, this blogs for you. You will be missed.

A Tale of Two Parties

2008-10-22T17:55:00.000-07:00

I had the most fabulous time at my two bday parties that I went to over the weekend. I love this second to last weekend in October. Every year, since I've been back on the east side, I have gotten the privilege of attending two birthday parties for two of my favorite people, both with names beginning with M. Maryanna and Molly.

As fun as these two parties are, they both couldn't be more different than they are. One is a family like event event with little kids and families and the other is a big party with some family and kids, but mostly good food and more adult beverages. Living between these two friends and these two parties sometimes makes me feel all mixed up.

At one party, I am meant to join the Moms and Dads that I could have been with had my life gone differently. I am meant to sit on the floor make crafts, talk about my favorite color, barbies, princesses, playing house and having cake all over my face like my fellow three-feet-tall party patrons. While at the other party, I am meant to feel young and single, and told by some, to have one-night stands and F buddies.

I like having a large group of friends to hang out with and am very thankful for all the birthday fun. But I would also like to be able to attend both kinds of parties and enjoy myself thoroughly without being reminded of what I don't have or what I should have. Of course sometimes, its my thoughts and feelings causing me to miss what I don't have, and other times, its my friends and party patrons telling me what I should do or have.

Either way, things like going to parties, enjoying playing among my fellow party patrons, and laughing off silly remarks from those that for a fleeting moment somehow wish to be in alternative places from where they currently reside, ALL OF IT, shouldn't bother me. Or maybe just bother me a little.... But having friends with names that begin with M, and there awesome birthday parties, that I am thankful very for.

Seeing the Future

2008-10-19T14:02:00.000-07:00

With Halloween coming up, I have been trying to decide what I should be for Halloween. This sparkly witch in this photo seems pretty cool, or maybe a gypsy or even a Vampire. I am thinking very strongly of going with Vampire. I always love a good bite!

But all the costume shopping and Halloween night dreaming has actually gotten me in tune with my own magical, Halloweeny skills and abilities. Did you ever realize that you could do something that you weren't entirely sure that you could do? Well, recently, last week I did find out that I could somewhat predict the future.

At work I had been known to have a particular ugly incident with SA that resulted in my resolve to use kindness. However, as I suspected from the encounter with SA at the meeting of the 4, which included at high level Program Management team member, my reputation and my work remained tarnished in this team member's eyes. I saw the future and knew that something would become of the fateful meeting of the 4. Last Friday I was removed from the program with SA and the PM team member.

Unlike my other colleagues, who mostly admit to making mistakes or forgetting to complete a responsibility during high, stressful work time, any slight imperfections that I performed were magnified by SA attempting to point out my flaws in front of those who make decisions. As I have explained, SA has also made particularly serious mistakes in her work. However, unlike with me, those who make decisions did not have SA's flubs highlighted for them.

Only my record was attacked, judged, carefully sifted through, put on display, combed through with a fine toothed comb, pointed to, spun, and written out for some to see. How did I know that this would happen? Well, when people act inappropriately, highly competitive, two-faced, and back stabbing, to make co-workers look bad in front of others, especially those who make decisions, I guess they sometimes get what they want...But as sure as I was that SA's actions would lead to my demise in the eyes of the PM's from this program, I am also sure that God, karma, pay-back, whatever you want to call it, will also return her ugliness with just desserts.

Bronco Burning Party, anyone?

2008-10-16T20:09:00.000-07:00

In lieu of the wasband not agreeing to merely pay off half of our joint credit card that wasn't even opened until after we were married, I have decided to begin asking him for more of my equitable fair share.

I will resist the temptation to take half of his 401K plan, even though I am completely entitled because he did not begin one until after we were married. I will even resist the fact to argue for my portion of his pension. But dammit to hell he bought, fixed up, spent hours tinkering on, but yet complains about the Bronco's ability to make it up here to fetch Darwin.

I think I am going to have to ask for my portion of the Bronco's fair market value (10 bucks??), which he purchased whilst we were married. And in NC, one's name on a title does not forgo the spouse's right to share in property that was obtained during marriage. I am thinking I should either ask for half its value, as it is our shared asset, or request the Bronco in its entirety to off set my forgoing of my rightful entitlement to his 401K and pension. Bronco burning ceremony anyone?

Alright, I am just kidding. Just showing, even more of what a douche he is for not agreeing to split one of our joint debts, where I am actually entitled to instead ask for half of everything acquired during marriage. Douche, douche, douche

But I did like driving that minivan and it might have been because like the Bronco, I felt very high up while driving. Hmmmmmmm....

I'll give you Rational!! I think that it is time...

2008-10-15T17:52:00.000-07:00

So it's been quite awhile since the wasband decided to come tell me he thought we should divorce. This news was of course not surprising to me at all considering all the back and forth and arguing that has gone on between us for sometime. What was considerably surprising was the reasons he gave.

Some of these reasons I cannot deny had merit. I was a depressive mess who never seemed happy or to care about anything while I lived in California. I was away from all my close friends, even though I made some great, new, really close friends.

While in Cali, I couldn't find work the first couple of months that I lived there, only adding to the depression funk. Bet you didn't know that in Cali you cannot work with a practicing attorney as a paralegal if you are a barred lawyer in another state. Jobs that I could get were not really at par with all that education that I had received and paid for.

The original thoughts of moving to North Carolina quickly faded, with the wasband's plans to possibly switch to the counter intelligence division. That then turned into the wasband's plan to possibly attend this illusive language school in Monterey and learn Arabic there. Moving to NC soon after marriage quickly turned into us living in Cali for over two years.

As you can imagine this lifestyle was not what I had signed up for. Sure I knew he'd be busy and I would have to make friends, that there would be deployments and separations, but not getting to begin my career and moving to a new city right after I was beginning to feel comfortable in the last one, just sucked. Numerous crappy fighting that will have to be broken down on future blogs happened in San Diego from time to time. But then came Monterey....

Moving to Monterey was no better for the career situation. I started temping and actually got to perform some legal prep work. Later I even got to work in the county courthouse as a paralegal in their legal self-help department which was rewarding. However, where the career situation slightly improved in the new city, the relationships, with the wasband, and with possible new friends only worsened.

In Monterey I had very few friends, and the only friends I made were work friends. In San Diego I met most of my close friends from being neighbors or through Tim's work colleagues who had wives. In Monterey all of Tim's friends in class were very single, not married, or women who were not interested in being friends. Because of the transient nature of Monterey, because most living there would only be there for school, neighbors rarely, if ever spoke or even waived in my direction. Life sucked there and my depression only deepened. This did not make me be a good supportive wife, I truly believe. But as I also believe, the depression was not entirely location related.

In Monterey we only grew more and more apart. The wasband became entrenched in his studies, as I knew he would. But studying also included drinking all night out at one of the bachelor's houses, blacking out from being so drunk, being as rude to me as possible whilst being drunk, ignoring me for the most part while sober or hung over, telling me that I should get some friends (because I didn't have tons back on the east side), getting mad at me for trying to join him on the "military party functions" because he did not want to be the only one there with a spouse (all the others were single), and screaming two feet from my face when ever we had an argument. Oh Wait....I forgot, being drunk in our mutual friends wedding (yes he was in the wedding and drunk) and grabbing the back of my scarf part of my dress and telling me that, "He could f-ing kill me" and that I shouldn't walk away from him.

I wanted so bad to be a good wife, future mother. I wanted to be supportive of him and his studies, making dinner every night, and keeping the house clean. But his weekend partying, his ignoring of me, our fights, his out-right meanness, my health issues and admittedly my depression, did not allow for awesome wife-ness to happen. Inevitably the marriage rapidly deteriorated, and despite both our intention to not completely give up on the marriage, we both decided it was best if I moved to the east coast, where I could begin my career and make more money, and he could concentrate more on studying, or more drinking, or find another significant other...whatever you want to believe.

We stayed in touch until the day in May, with every intention to continue our marriage. We talked of the future, he called me nearly everyday and told me he loved me. We still had fights, like on last Thanksgiving when he told me not to bother coming because I would inevitably piss him off. But oh he still loved me, blah blah blah. And yes thereafter, we still spoke over the phone nearly everyday and he still told me he loved me and we still spoke of the future together.
Well, in May he drove straight up from his new station in North Carolina (he finally got there, sans me) and told me that he did not want to be married anymore and gave me his reasons. It did not take me too long into the conversation to realize who of us was more rational and logical.

Part of the conversation went something like this:
Wasband - "I blame you for failing out of the Arabic class and you were not at all supportive."
Janet - "I admit that I could have been more supportive and was very depressed, but what specifically can you point to? Give me an example of something."
Wasband - "Well, when I asked you to help me study and I gave you the flashcards, you would just laugh at them and not even try to help me study."
Janet stares at wasband in disbelief.

ARABIC USES ANOTHER ALPHABET!!! It has squiggly lines and other characters (see above missing the prenunciation in english). How was I supposed to help him with flash cards when I can't read the Arabic writing on them?? And furthermore, since when is a spouse responsible for their spouse doing well in school? My mother received two Masters Degrees and never once asked my dad, or required him to provide her with learning or studying assistance. But she sure did keep up better with the cooking and cleaning. Gotta love those devoted 60's southern housewives.
Apparently, it would have been more rational for the wasband to have created a pre-nup requiring, every night cooking and cleaning, no illnesses, ignorance of alcoholism, the patience of a saint, and of course, a thorough grasp of the Arabic language.

Numbness

2008-10-14T13:54:00.000-07:00

So I have been trying to arrange for the wasband to come and fetch one of the dogs. Like any divorce, we have to divide our possessions and that included the division of animals. Consequently, my heart has been breaking all month knowing that I would have to give up my Marvin-Darwin to the beast of a bastardy wasband.

Just today I received an email from him stating that he was not coming up here this weekend as he originally thought. My first thought, good, more time with Marvin-Darwin, second thought, hope he is not going to be completely ridiculous about finding a way to come get him and ubberly uncooperative, and third thought, OH MY GOSH, I move in a month and cannot take M-D with me, Wasband better get his butt up here beforehand or find a place for M-D in the meantime.

Of course, since the first read over of his message I have had many other thoughts, like puking, wishing I never married him, wishing I did not have to deal with ever conversing with him again, and hoping that the whole thing would just end. But to no avail, I must deal.

I also get to deal with the paranoia of his apparent attorney that has told him not to go into Virginia, where I might possibly serve him with paperwork for a divorce and create a jurisdictional issue. Although, as he actually correctly stated, "I am making him deal with this".

That sounds bad. I will deal with the big D from the wasband, despite my wish that, like him, I want it to all just disappear. I will not lay passively aside while he "takes me to the cleaners". I am merely making him go through the motions of filing for the divorce, where as I plan to be on the defensive and attack the divorce paperwork.

But here's the problem......I am numb. Not sure why. I am not shocked that this stuff is coming to a head, I am not shocked that Mr. Likely Adulterer is pushing through to get the divorce or separation finalized,....I am not sure why I am numb. That is why I write.

Maybe tomorrow, after an attempt of a night's sleep, I will feel less numb. However, I did manage to let the genius of a wasband know that coming here to meet and exchange animals for belongings on Friday, October 31st, Halloween was probably a bad idea since I will be likely performing Halloweeny duties with the 'Kins, or pre-celebrating Meghan's BDay, and because IT'S HALLOWEEN!!! And I also suggested that I could possibly send him M-D with the special pet shipping company that we used to ship the dogs from CA to VA. We shall see his response......Oh wait, he will probably have to go over it first with his attorney. I guess it pays to be an attorney yourself, or rather I don't have to pay "to go over legal issues dealing with a divorce". No, I write my friends and this blog to get out what the next step should be. ARGHHHHH!!! Boys are stupid. Throw rocks at them.

Terrapins vs Hokies. Who would win, the turtle or the turkey?

2008-10-09T16:41:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I went to my 1st VA Tech football game and I found the Hokie culture fascinating, however it profoundly reminded me of the MD Terrapin Basketball culture with its many cultural traditions. In this blog, I attempt to compare the two.

VA TECH FOOTBALL v MD TERRAPIN BASKETBALL

Prior to the start of a MD Basketball game, Coach Gary Williams the seasoned b-ball coach, pumps his fist at the crowd, to indicate that its going to be an awesome game and that the crowd should also be pumped. Unfortunately, we got into the VA Tech game late and I am not sure if there are any similar things at a VA Tech football game, but the VA Tech cadets do march across the campus to the football field and that is certainly, most likely a "fist pumping" site.

Upon the entrance of the VA Tech Hokie football players, the Hokie student and alumni sections know to jump up and down. As with the MD Basketball players' entrance the students mimic the same bobble-headed behavior. The students, mostly and some alumni (including old and young) the MD fans also jump up and down.

MD fans, this time almost exclusively the students, have an additional player entrance traditional behavior. However, this tradition has to deal with the opposing teams player entrance. As described in the MD traditional folklore sites I visited for a precise description, "Maryland students pretend to read the school newspaper when the opposing team is introduced. As if that is enough to show their antipathy for the visiting team, they tack-on a "sucks" to the end of every opposing player's name when it is announced. (e.g. Joe Smith (students: "Sucks!")) ". VA Tech football fans and students alike, although not interested in the other team's entrance on the field, they do not have to deal with the individual reading of the starting line-up and do not of course have any response.

Both the VA Tech Hokies Football fans and the MD Terrapin basketball fans practice similar acts to try and distract the opposing team that attempts to make a free throw in b-ball or field goal in football. However, the MD basketball fans, again consisting mostly of students have an action they perform when the Terrapins are attempting free throw. Again as Wikapedia describes, "When the Terrapins are shooting free throws, students hold their arms over their heads. If the shot is made, thy will drop them to their side while uttering 'whoomp.'"

I am unsure if VA Tech football has begun any national college football traditions, but the MD Terrapins have the distinction of founding Midnight Madness. This Madness event, was started by MD head coach Lefty Driesell in 1970. Formerly, Midnight Madness was a student event held at the earliest time the men's basketball team could start regular season practice - at midnight on the first day of NCAA sanctioned basketball practice start date. According to my good friend Wikapedia, "Recently, Maryland and some other schools have moved the start of Midnight Madness to earlier in the day - generally around 7 o'clock - with permission of the NCAA, of course."

Therefore, in the argument between the two, I have to give MD their props. As fun as that Hokie football game was (and boy will I cheer for them when the Hokies play VA), MD traditions must win out in the fan war between the two sports. The MD Terrapins re responsible for a tradition followed by schools all over the country. As far as I know, the Hokies to not have similar founding sports phenomenon.

You know that I am, however, bias. I graduated from UMD and will always find their traditions in higher regard. Even though the Princeton Review has no articles measuring or comparing sports fans traditions, I can tell you that the Princeton Review has said in their 2008 College Review magazine, that Maryland was ranked "#1 in its annual "Students Pack the Stadiums" ranking of student athletic support.[1]". So at least the MD Terrapin students' athletic support out ranks VA Tech. Ummm....but that has, on occasion translated into burning couches in the middle of Route 1. Oh well, how else do you celebrate when you beat Duke, like VA Univ? Nobody likes Duke.

GUINNESS IS GOOD FOR YOU & ME

2008-10-08T19:42:00.000-07:00

My girl Shell went on a fun fun trip recently and brought back some fun gifts. Knowing my love for Guinness, she decided to get me some flip-flops with the Guinness logo emblazoned on the flip-flop straps. Of course they were men's flip-flops and she had to guess my shoe size. She was off an inch or two, oh well.

So apparently the flip-flop makers think that Guinness is only a men's beverage. I say NOOOO to this nonsense. Guinness, being first a beer, does lend it more to the male persuasion, however, how can anyone not see its benefits?

Its taste, its smoothness, its thickness but nutty flavor, its hints of chocolaty taste, its low calorie content, its goodness for you (see sign above), and yes, its health benefits. Bet you didn't know that Guinness was once given to nursing and pregnant mothers in the hospital due to its high iron content. Also, it is still given to some blood donors and stomach and intestinal post-operative patients, in Ireland and formally, in England. Basically Guinness ROCKS!

But seriously, I love the taste of Guinness so much that I would even drink it if it were non-alcoholic. Although, I would probably not get to experience the "aphrodisiac" benefits without the alcohol. Nonetheless, I am a female drinker and lover god's gift to beer, my Guinness.

For more info on my favorite beverage see this site and lovely Q&A.

http://www.ivo.se/guinness/health.html

My Firsts

2008-10-07T20:36:00.000-07:00

First Made Up Face

First Snow

First VA Tech Game

So my favorite bloggist Stephanie Klein is running a photo contest for firsts. The prize is a super glitzy baby gift bag thing, which I can't completely use, but if you've read my first blog, I know many many folks with child and would have no difficulty giving the baby stuff away.

Anyhow, having no children myself, I decided to use some other recent firsts. Here are the photos that I used to enter the contest.

Blogging for Janet's Sake

2008-10-06T17:23:00.000-07:00

So last week I experienced a particular hellish work event and then decided to blog about it. Like any, story that describes how exactly a misunderstanding or fight occurs, the description can be long, unending, word vomit, as I like to call it.

The long story that was filled with confusing this and thats, was not a blog to create entertainment. I blogged about the incident in order to get the yucky, nauseous, feelings in my mind about the interaction out. I don't blog to make those that know SA think that she is evil, I don't blog to make me look better than SA, I don't blog to bore any readers with a long drown out event, I don't blog to promote any agenda, I blog for me. I don't blog for blog's sake, I blog for Janet's sake.

Back to the Backstabbing

2008-10-03T06:49:00.000-07:00

Well, this funny cartoon is really not completely accurate but as close as I could get to the actual situation....

Last week, I had a similar cartoon and forewarning that I was unsure if I wanted to write about a recent work incident with a back stabbing, two-faced, work colleague. If you cannot yet tell, I am still feeling a bit burnt, but a lot less sad and beat up then I was at the conclusion of work yesterday.

So my work turmoil all began in a meeting of four women, involved in the monitoring of a program and its subcontracts. Of the 4, including myself, are an assistant program manager, my supervisor, and a program control/financial analyst person. Concocting all of the necessary spells and potions that make the program and its subcontracts work and behave as they are supposed to, takes the four of us as a team. But one of the 4 in this coven were not acting of the same coven. (sorry I am feeling Halloweeny)

My program control/financial analyst who I will call SA has what I like to call, a "know-it-all" personality. She knows it all of course, but also likes to point it out when you may or may not know all, and of course likes to point out any mistakes that you may have made. Well, in our meeting of the 4, SA brings out a list of modifications that she claims that I have failed to update in my special database. She hands this list to me at our meeting of the 4 in front of my boss and the asst. PM. This may not sound as evil as it is, except for the fact that the meeting had to deal with re-checking the funding levels of the program that we work for, which has little to do with updating of the database. Furthermore, updating of this particular database is my responsibility and is actually one of the many points that my boss uses to make a decision regarding my raise and review. So basically, SA brought out an attention grabbing list of things she claims that I failed to do, directly in front of two other higher level people, without first checking with me about whether it was a simple mistake or some other reason.

Well, it turned out that some of the records that she claimed I failed to update, were in fact neglectful mistakes on my part, which my own boss also admits having similar cases of forgetfulness. However, some of the records she claimed I had failed to update were not at all my own failing. The records could not be updated because the signed documents were not yet received, or I had combined some of the records and she was off by the numbering, or there had not yet existed the time in one record to have a need to update because the record was so new. Basically, she did a half ass job of collecting information to bring me down, with half assed ammo.

Yesterday, everything came to head. I went to discuss something else with SA and actually complemented her work. She asked me to update her whenever I combined records, and I said I would, but that she could also just check the database, because that is why it is there. She of course then brought up my failure to make the updates. I asked if she had seen my follow-up post back stabbing meeting where I had written to the other 3 explaining how the lack of updating that she caught me in, was for some part, incorrect. She said she hadn't gotten to look over that email yet and then began to look over it with me right then.

More claims were thrown that I had not processed this and that and that I did not do this right. I went back to my desk and re-checked my files and brought back some evidence. I pointed out that I had forgotten to update the funding value in the particular record we were looking at and that I did however, add all the necessary information in the record that would get the answer anyone would need to proceed with any other work.

I have no problem admitting when I forget to do something by the way. This job has lots of holes, were one may begin typing and entering data and then the phone rings and you forget your place and what you were doing last and then Guess What.....the things do not get updated completely. I however, have further checks. Before I begin a new subcontract modification, I go back to the database and make sure all the info was updated correctly from the last modification. But, at this point yesterday, as well as the meeting last week, that internal check I perform had not occurred because no new subcontract mods had been issued. I guess, that may defeat the point in my asking her to check the database for information, because it may still be in that in-between time of where I began entering, but my final check had not been performed at the time she may be viewing it. But Hey! Even now I admit that my logic of asking her to review the database may have been faulted, but I do admit it.

Back to the part that makes SA truly two-faced and back stabbing, but more two-faced, at this point. I need to start by saying that I have thought SA was my friend, and although we have had some issues, I thought she would still act like somewhat of a friend, even when flustered. Boy was I wrong...

So, when I came back to her with the evidence that I had to show her that her claims of my wrongdoing were wrong themselves, as well as other misconceptions that she had, SA told me to go away and collect my thoughts and that she was not going to talk to me like this.

I admit, I may have been cocky when I brought back the evidence to show her, but as a friend described it in a similar situation with her, I was merely responding to her "know-it-all"ness and her arrogantness with a similar level. My voice was not raised. Nevertheless, I do feel guilty reacting in a similar way to a person at work.

After SA told me to go away and collect my thoughts, I stood behind her about 5 feet, trying to do just that...collect my thoughts. She then said, "Janet, you can stand there all day. I am not going to talk to you." I said, in as calmly a voice as I could, that I was collecting myself and calming down. You see, her reaction to me when I came to bring some sort of evidence to show that she was wrong, was the same reaction of the wasband and as I stood there, after being told to go collect myself, that is when I started to loose it even more, because I had felt threatened by her finding my faults, but I did not feel unwound. Having SA say to me to go collect myself made me want to scream or cry.

I thought to myself, as I stood there gripping the chair tightly, that this was silly and that I knew we'd have to continue working together. I pulled up a chair right next to SA and began to say that I wanted to explain myself and about why I might be feeling hurt by her attempting to call out my mistakes. I was going to explain how I thought the incident last week where she brought out a list of database entries that she thought I had failed to update. I was even going to point out how I had caught several of her mistakes that I had not brought to either her or her boss's attention. I wanted to tell SA that I just went ahead and fixed her blunders instead of making a big show of them because I realized that maybe she had just made a simple mistake. HOWEVER, before I could begin to let this emotional word vomit out, SA cut me off and said, "I told you I don't want to talk to you about this now." I responded by saying that I just wanted to say something that she would not need to respond, but just to listen. This was followed by an utterly hurtful comment that my boss described as unprofessional and just plain mean. SA said, "She did not want to even listen to me right now and that I should just go away." So, I did......

After talking over this situation with many a friend, my mom, my brother and my supervisor, I have decided to do what my friend did in a similar circumstance. Kill her with kindness. Not sarcastic kindness, but the kindness that is genuinely in my nature. My boss, however also decided to point out to SA one of the mistakes that I had recently pushed aside and corrected myself. My boss thought it necessary to do this not just to make a point that even, "know-it-alls" make mistakes too, but also because the mistake SA made was an auditable issue that looked as if we may have de-obligated funding under the same request because two companies were mistakenly listened on the same PR by SA.

My boss also asked me if I wanted to rearrange who I worked with so as to avoid SA. But I told her that I was going to stick to the killing with kindness. In fact, it was my job to bring in the bagels for our Bagel Friday and I made sure to bring an entire bag of SA's favorite. And no, I did not add any secret ingredients to them.....

Home is.....

2008-10-01T20:07:00.000-07:00

So I rented an apartment today. Not that crazy of a thing. This is the 4th apartment that I have lived in since leaving my parents home, but it got me thinking about what home is.

I am sure that you have heard the speech the late George Carlin gives about "stuff" and that home is just a place where you store all your stuff, but I guess I have some romanticized vision of what home is and what home should be. I guess, I haven't really felt like I have had a "home" since college and after I left the nest.

Yes, I have been married, I lived with my wasband in a place that we kind of decorated and picked out all the pieces, furniture, and other lifely things one gets for the place that they store their stuff and where they come home to. But we never had a home. And before the marriage as I lived on my own in one of my various apartments, it was never a place that I could consider a home. So, what is it? What makes a home a home?

Family? Does that make it? Although, my biological family has, for the most part, all moved away from this area, with the exception of my brother, I feel as though many of my friends are in a way my family. Just this past weekend I somehow arranged 10 of my close friends to come out and celebrate my birthday and my turning older, and I remember feeling happy, loved, and melded into something, that created a whole, even if just for awhile. Was that my home? My friends?

I don't know, maybe the concept of home just shifts from a place where you become part of a whole with your family, into a place where you store your stuff so that you can go out and have "home" with your new "family". I guess I have to start planning more get-togethers now that I have discovered something that feels like my "home". Ohhh, and maybe I can re-rent that mini-van!

Just to let you know...Air is NOT FREE

2008-09-30T12:22:00.001-07:00

My weekend experience started off as one of "those" weekends, the moment I turned out of the parking garage onto Crystal Drive. Two people walking down the street starting waiving and yelling out, "Hey!" frantically in my direction. My first thought,....oh great I pulled into a motorcade or at the least left some papers, file, or beverage on the roof of my car. I was not however so lucky.

I rolled down my window to question the attention grabbers and they yelled, "You have a flat tire". Don't know about you, but I have had many a flat tire, and I am very much aware of the swoosh, glob, swoosh sound that it makes as you attempt to drive. I didn't have a flat tire. However, flash rewind, to when my very kind neighbor mowed the lawn at my house the other day. I do believe he said that I should put air in one of my tires. DAMMIT!!

So, I began anxiously searching down the streets of Crystal City for air. Towards Pentagon City, near the 395 exit and between all the garden and high rise apartments. NO GAS STATIONS!!! NO AIR!!! Arghhh!!

Finally, I gave up, not hearing that glob, swoosh sound, I knew the tire was not flat yet....

I made it all the way down to Edsall Road, my exit towards home off of 395. Luckily there are a choice of three different gas stations to choose from, right when you get off the exit ramp. I pulled into the first one and up to the the pump marked, "AIR".

By golly, that thing said it cost $.75 to put air in your tires and my first thought was that that must be just this gas station. How can air cost money? Air is free...We breath air! But as I pulled into each of the other two stations, sure enough...they were also $.75. What is going on here?

Well, fearing that I had already gambled with the slightly deflated, although NOT FLAT, swoosh, glob glob tire and my life enough, I went into the gas station convenience store and withdrew some cash (yup, of course I had none) and bought a diet pepsi so that I could coax the gas attendant to give me $.75 in quarters because, what should be FREE AIR must only be paid for in quarters...

As it was, I got my $.75 air while taking out my $2.50 cash from the ATM, and buying my $1.15 diet pepsi, to get my quarters. What an expensive ride home. At least I did not have to take the toll road or add any other expenses to my god forsaken commute.

But seriously, why does it cost to buy air? Although, in the late 80's, early 90's they said the same about bottled water.

I am so bad....

2008-09-29T20:54:00.000-07:00

Too drained to write a meaningful blog while I am still recovering from all the birthday fun. But I do believe that I have some good topics coming up to write about. Soon....maybe tomorrow.

Can't.....

2008-09-25T16:55:00.000-07:00

Can't talk...the Office is almost on. But I have a good complainy, whiney story about work that I cannot decide if I should write about or not. But think about how awesome it is to work with two faced, back stabbing people while I am gone. Here is a perfect cartoon to demonstrate the topic!

Watching Earl and then the Office. Later.

Warm Nights Full of Terror

2008-09-24T19:20:00.000-07:00

What is it about cold nights, smothered in my red flannel blanket (making it a warmer night for me) and the watching of scary movies that goes together? Who knows....But here I am in my chair, red wine in hand, engulfed in the red warm, flannelly blanket and my feet entrenched in the warm fuzzy slippers and a horror movie is all I care to watch.

Maybe being cozy-ed up to watch something that seems spooky is reminiscent of something else warm and comfortable to me, when in the past I cozy-ed up with someone else while watching such similar scary movies. Oh well....at least I have spider killer, Syd.

Mine Kills Spiders. What does yours do?

2008-09-22T18:27:00.001-07:00

So I hate spiders. Who doesn't? But luckily I have my trusty German Shepherd. Last night I saw a particularly menacing looking spider climb up the wall to the left of the television. I felt like I was in a horror movie or something. It seemed huge!! I said first softly, then louder and loudly "Sydney,..Sydney, SYDNEY!!" She came over sniffed me to make sure I was breathing, I guess, where I began frantically pointing at the wall.

Syd looked at the moving black spot, smelled my fear, and knew her next move. She leaped up about half a foot and in one quick slurp, the spider was gone. I gave her a million pets and good girls. She proudly ran after her bone and wagged her whole bottom in glee as I covered her in kisses and thankful rubs. My dog kills spiders for me. What can yours do?

I am Janet, you are an a$$!

2008-09-20T08:49:00.000-07:00

So this morning I fell asleep on the couch after watching the beginning of the Sean Penn movie, I am Sam. When I woke up after a short cat nap, I began watching the movie towards the end. Although the movie does have some sad parts, it ends all on the up and up. It is actually one of those heart felt, tear-jerkers that ends in total bliss and happiness as the dad, Sean Penn is seen running all over a soccer field excited, with his daughter (creepy Dakota Fanning, but when she was still cute) in his arms.

Alright, I am a sucker. I really like this movie. It has a trial in it, a sassy female lawyer, children, and one of my favorite legal principals, "the best interest of the child" doctrine. All of my favorite elements.

So as I am sitting there watching and remembering how much I liked this movie, I began to think, why I haven't seen it lately? I think I even own this movie. Then I realized something....the wasband used to say to me, "that the movie is too sad and a downer. Why would I want to watch that?" Suddenly I had an epiphany about him and this movie.

Okay, so an epihany about movie watching is pretty stupid but regardless, it gave me some insite into his f-ed up brain. You know, I truly believe that he did not like watching this movie, not because of the sad moments, or even its kitchy dorkiness,..He did not like this movie because it reminded him of his own child that he never sees.

The entire point of the movie, I Am Sam, is to show how a a parent's love prevails and that it is an extremely strong bond. Well, the wasband in his infinite wisdom had decided previously to our being married, that he would no longer attempt to see his own son. You see his son, lives with his ex-wife, his high-school sweetheart and her family, and she seems to want to keep it that way. The wasband always said that he came from a broken home and did not want to put his son through the same fighting between parents that he had endured. But how can someone not want to fight for their son? Why...because he is an a$$!!

I am not a parent, but I can only imagine the connection one would have with a child that is their own flesh and blood. That child is a part of him. I should have known back then when we were talking and he told me about his lack of connection with his own flesh in blood, that I would certainly have no shot at any kind of connection with him. I cannot begin to understand or know his other reasons behind this, other than the fact that yes,...he is an ass!

Rat Killer is Awesome, so I take it every day!

2008-09-18T16:33:00.000-07:00

So a while back I explained my experience having my DVT clot, and my Heroes mutated condition, homozygous factor five leiden, that makes me "super clotting girl." Although most pain from the clot subsided after 7-8 months, the main difference in my life was my new friend,...the rat killer, coumadin.

After doctors discover that anyone has a clot, the nice doctors make you take blood thinners. Beginning blood therapy is the desired first round of treatment for a DVT clot, despite any genetic disorders one may have. The blood thinners will hopefully slowly break down the clot until it all but dissolves. I say hopefully because some clots get worse before breaking down and must be injected with a special protein that rapidly breaks down a clot. Unfortunately there are only 5 -7 of these special proteins that rapidly break down blood clots. Therefore, beginning on blood therapy first, is the desirable approach, barring any emergencies. So, like with most, my doctors began my treatment to break down the clot with the blood thinners.

To begin the blood thinning therapy, first you inject yourself into your stomach with heparin. You may have heard of heparin as the medication that has recently been on the news because of its accidental overdosing of infants in the hospital. Dennis Quade's twins were given to much heparin after their birth and almost died. Heparin, itself sounds dangerous enough, but after the heparin, comes the coumadin.

But wait, after they begin you on the injectible medication and the coumadin, they also torture you by taking your blood, first every other day, then every two days, then twice a week, and finally once a month. I don't know if you know this, but taking blood thinners (which, heparin and coumadin both are) you tend to bruise, very easily. So having your arms, hands, wrists, etc. stuck with a needle to draw your blood for a test leaves your arms looking lovely. The blood test that is necessary to measure what I like to call my blood's consistency, is called PT/INR.

As I said, like others with a DVT clot, blood thinning therapy is the way to go. However, after the doctors realize that you have my factor five leiden mutation disorder, they decide that you get to take coumadin FOREVER, da, da daaaaa. That's right rat thinner and monthly blood tests are my way of life. Plus side, I am over my fear of needles. The initial injections I gave myself and the blood tests make me hardly even flinch whenever I see a needle. Negative, taking rat poison has, as one may think, lots of side effects.

Side effects page from the pharmacy is seriously two pages. They include things like, bruising, dry mouth, excessive sweating, chills, blood shot eyes, hemorrhage, and that I eating Vitamin K enriched foods will cause the medicine to work less effectively. Vitamin K enriched foods include all dark green vegetables, like broccoli, spinach, kale, green beans, lettuce, etc. You try dieting, while being sure to limit your lettuce intake.

Not only is my vegetable intake affected, but as you can imagine, taking blood thinner also affects your alcohol intake. However, with this new drug and its interactions and blood tests, also comes with a special doctor, the hematologist. Luckily, my awesome hematologist showed me that I can do lots of things on my rat killer, like balance my Vitamin K greens to the medicine; meaning that I must maintain a weekly steady amount of greens every week and allow the medicine to adjust to my intake. Like with the greens, I balance the intake of alcohol over the week and have the medicine adjust to this intake. What is hilarious is that I have to drink alcohol consistently if I am going to drink at all. It has to be a balanced amount. My friends find it hilarious that I have to drink alcohol consistently with the medicine so not to mess up my PT level. I just find it fabulous.

In this vain, I have learned to balance the rat killer with the amount of alcohol that I have. More greens make the blood more thick, if I drink more alcohol. I would definitely not recommend this kind of balancing act, but it has been working for me. My PT/INR tests have been very steady and luckily I have made it through almost 2 years straight of taking the rat killer without any complications.

By the way, when I call it a rat killer, I am not exaggerating. My always truthful friend, Wikapedia says it all: Coumadin, that is also known as, "warfarin was first registered for use as a rodenticide in the US in 1948, and was immediately popular".

For more information on yours and my favorite rat killer, see the US Dept. of Health and Human Services information link: http://www.ahrq.gov/consumer/coumadin.htm

Finally....

2008-09-16T12:02:00.000-07:00

OK so I have to finish my "homework" from the therapist....but first I have a question. Should people think you are crazy just because you see a therapist? I don't think so, I think that if one is fully aware that therapy could help with their self-esteem and improve themselves, or if a person thinks that they should see a therapist in the first place, then by definition they cannot be crazy, because a crazy person doesn't know they are crazy and would not know that they need help. Don't quote me on that "definition" though.

Anyhow, back to my homework:

h) What are some of the things you would like to stop doing. Smoking, craving too much chocolate, making excuses to not blog, and to not need someone else to be interested in me to make me feel good about myself. I think I have made some headway on some of these, but they still need work.

i) What are some of the things you would really like to get better at? Definitely to write more often and almost every day, to write about what is "really" bothering me, to again feel happy and know how awesome I am. I would also like to maybe have some kind of musical skill. I can't sing or really play any instrument. It would be awesome to learn something to make me more musically inclined.

j) What are some peak experiences that I have had? Hmmmmm. Graduating law school, passing the Bar exam, zip lining, kayaking and horseback riding on vacation.

k) What are some peak experiences that you would like to have? Mostly see above, minus the going to law school. I think I would like to take the VA Bar exam, and would like to do all three activities listed above. Hiking to the top of something awesome and looking out onto the world. Taking pictures that get hung on someone who is not in my families' wall. Oh and finish at least a half marathon, even if I have to walk it.

l) Are there some values you are struggling to establish? I think that not over indulging would be one. But there is a fine line between enjoying all of life and not over indulging in spirits and wonderfully decadent chocolate. Otherwise, I think I have pretty good values, I don't lie about me, obviously, it's all up here. I don't cheat, not even if a relationship, although I could write about a few "others" I know that could work on that value. But all and all, I think I am pretty virtuous.

m) What was one missed opportunity in life? Not establishing my career after law school. I got married and moved to Cali. Jobs in Cali were far from career builders, despite what I made from them, and they made me feel awful about myself.

n) What are some things you want to start doing now, at this point of your life? Not sure, maybe training for the half marathon and getting hold of some good photography books from my awesome friend Jen. That's probably the only thing I can start doing right now and afford to start doing at this point in my life. Why do things have to be so expensive?

Well,...that's it. I guess I found out some things I would like to do and continue doing, but I kind of knew these already. Ho hum...maybe I am crazy.

WOW!!! I am lazy.

2008-09-15T17:31:00.000-07:00

I wish that my non-blogging-ness could be the result of the broken finger. But, No... It has to deal with my watching of all the new Fall Premieres. I am beginning to realize that I am totally a science geek. I think that is okay....at least I am realizing what kind of things that I like myself without having to only like the things that my significant or in my case, insignificant other likes.

FALL TV SHOWS that I am addicted to:
-Terminator: Sara Conner Chronicles (OK, so I like it when women get to kick ass too)
- Fringe (again, see above reason and add the creator of LOST)
- Bones (I am beginning to see a trend here)
- Heroes (haven't seen, but can't wait)
- The Office (speaks for itself)
- Eli Stone (liked this show, but maybe only because it was after LOST)
- Football, of course (I am a fantasy football person)
- Entourage (lots of eye candy and funny, funny lines)
- True Blood (VAMPIRES)
- Any show with dogs :)

Okay, So to continue....

2008-09-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

The Blog that I have been overdo on continuing is from a "homework" assignment from my therapist. That's right, I see a therapist. Someone has to help me heal from this mess with the wasband and since his military health insurance is fitting the bill, I contend that getting as much therapy as possible, for free, is only "fitting".

Back to the assignment - The worksheet is entitled, "Exercises that can help with goal setting." Apparently, the therapist has not read my "Ready, Set, GOAL!!! " blog, or maybe she thinks I need more than 5 goals. But hey, I'll play along, it can only help.

The first portion of the exercise worksheet is to imagine your ideal 48 hours and "to picture in your fantasy-- smells, sounds, feelings, weather, etc." Crap, Crap, Crap. This is impossible. I can't even begin to see this. I know it would be a nice, 70 degree day where there are only the sound of nature. I want to say it is the beach, because everyone says that, but if you know me, you know that me and the beach, or rather the sun don't get along. Hmmm....I think Sydney would almost assuredly be there. She always makes me smile. And maybe even the Mollykins, she is always good to help brighten my mood. But where am I, don't know.... Maybe I should come back to this one, unless anyone else has any good ideas.

The next portion of the exercise worksheet has a list of questions. These may be easier. Let's see.

a. What is the happiest year or period in my life? Whoa. That is a big one. Maybe some time in my childhood. I'd say probably 8th grade when I had several very close girlfriends, whom I still have as close girlfriends. I don't remember why it was good though. I just remember feeling happy.

b. What things do you do well? Well, school. I do that well. That goes back to my original goals blog. I also listen to people well.

c. What was a turning point in your life? Hmmm. Recently or long ago? Probably the most significant turning point was realizing that I had a blood clotting condition that would affect almost everything that I ever do. Also the fact that I lived through the clot that could have killed me.

d. What has been the lowest point? Probably realizing that my marriage was in shambles and realizing that I probably should have never gotten married in the first place.

e. Was there an event that you demonstrated great courage? Now everything I have been writing has to deal with the clot suddenly, but it was/is a pretty significant part of my life. The event, although it seems kind of minor, took loads of courage for me, and it happened every day in the month, post clot. I had to give myself a shot of heparin in my stomach twice a day. Prior to this, I was afraid of needles and getting over that fear enough to administer the medication to myself, seemed something huge and very courageous for me.

f. Was there a time of heavy grief? That time has been now and since that "may day" really. I experienced some grief post clot, but have learned that the experience made me feel more lucky and thankful more than anything.

WOW--This is a long long post and I still have 8 more letters to go. I think I will continue the rest tomorrow. Until then....

Waiting....

2008-09-10T14:31:00.000-07:00

I am crazy freaking impatient. Did you ever really know that about yourself? I am sitting at Shell's house waiting for her to get home from work and to bring her daughter in. And here she is....

One day, I will type more... I have to write more and actually have more to say. Later.

No....I haven't fallen off the face of the earth.

2008-09-08T13:42:00.000-07:00

So, my parents are in town and have been for almost a week. I have been neglecting my therapeutic blogging because of their visit, although I could probably have really kept up and probably should have kept up with it while they've been here. But what are you going to do?

My parents decided to come visit me because of the sadness in my voice...or so I was told. But I really think that it was to come and hang out with my brother and I because they are lonely down there in their "Old Folks" retired neighborhood. Luckily, they have gotten a lot of things done for my brother's wedding while in town, so it has really been the best for everyone.

While here, to appease them I decided to attend the church that they like in the area called McLean Bible Church. I know some of you are groaning just thinking about it, but I thought, "What the heck." I could use something different to cheer me up. Here are my thoughts of the entire experience.

Upon first walking into the place, I was struck by how many young people, my age that were there. This I really did like, because I associate most church experiences with lots of older folks. When I walked into the door, I couldn't believe it. The place has a freakin cafeteria. That is crazy. Families were all nestled into the small tables, in the cafeteria like in the mall food court and I couldn't help thinking that maybe they were shopping for comfort. Maybe like me.

After finding our way to the sanctuary, or rather auditorium, I was floored by how big this places was. It was almost like a sports arena, but not in the round. I noticed how large the musical/orchestra area was and floored that a church, even one as big as this one, could have so many musically inclined folks. I have to tell you though, when the music started it was actually pretty good. Churchy, preachy music, but good and contemporary sounding, with a slight bit of holiness, oldies thrown in. I liked it.

Of course, then came the sermon. This is given by the guy on the radio who has the commercials that say, "Not a sermon, just a thought". Well, he actually sounds just like he does on the radio which was reassuring or disturbing, I don't know. I was happy with most of the message concerning being a holy person and sharing the word and such, but dissatisfied by it in the end. I was hoping that the MBC (as it is called) was not a closed church. A closed church is a church that preaches against homosexuality and says that God loves everyone, but that homosexuality is immoral.

This condemnation that the church made very clear disturbed me and confused me. In many ways this was an extremely contemporary church. They even had a freakin coffee bar for god's sake. Do the folks at MBC know what kind of hipster, open, poetically tragic people started the coffee bar phenomenon? I mean just watch, So I Married an Ax Murderer or Reality Bites. Anyhow, I was disappointed.

My initial observations of the church, although slightly hokey, seemed promising. But their positions regarding sexuality seem archaic and very un-modern. According to my good friend Wikapedia (always a very true source) many Christian churches have come to the conclusion that homosexuality is not immoral. These include liberal congregations within the United Church of Christ, the Episcopal Church in the United States of America, the Moravian Church, the Anglican Church of Canada, the Methodist Church of Great Britain, and Friends General Conference. My belief that one's sexuality can never be immoral is a fundamental belief that I cannot go back on.

So, I've decided to become Episcopalian,...if only I can wake up in time to make it there for a service. Or, I will use MBC to find a nice Christian boy to be my new boyfriend and then teach him the true ways of the world. I haven't decided which I will be doing yet.

Man, I miss the Office!

2008-09-02T19:16:00.000-07:00

I am watching old re-runs on the Office. Man, I miss this show. But something I have found, is that those who have not worked in an office, cannot really appreciate the humor as much. Or maybe I am just pissed that they don't agree with my opinion of one of the greatest shows ever and therefore I am finding something rational to explain their obviously flawed thinking.

Who on earth cannot appreciate a stapler stuck inside of a jello mold?

(I had written a more thoughtful blog that somehow did not get saved. So, this lame blog that is basically an advertisement for the show, will have to satisfy my writing necessity for today.)

When does it start?

2008-09-01T19:36:00.000-07:00

I was watching some old Sex and the City episodes to entertain myself this labor day and I began to think about one of the points that Charlotte from the show, made. She said that when you are in love with someone, it takes half the time that you were in love with the person to get over the person. But I have such a weird "break-up history". When does my countdown begin?

My wasband and I have now been separated for one year. Not separated in the legal sense, but it has been one year since we have lived together. A year ago, after his encouragement or rather his compelling me, I moved back to the east side to find employment, to be near my family and friends, and most importantly to allow him to be free from me so that he could study, study, study. Too bad he failed, failed, failed.

But anyhow, after I left him in Cali to live here in VA, we never really considered ourselves, legally separated, or maybe we should have, not sure. I only saw him on two separate occasions after I left Calif. Once for 3 days over Thanksgiving and another time for 48 hours over the New Year's eve and day. (oh and the day in May he drove here to say he did not want to be married anymore,.....but that is for another post) We talked on the phone nearly every day, before that date in May, when our legal separation began. But I wonder, does that whole year we lived on separate coasts count in Charlotte's rule? I am not sure.

I definitely don't miss, and yearn for him. But I do miss little things we shared like favorite movies and songs, and the idea that I had a future and a life together with someone. But I do not miss him. He is/was an ass. I do however, sometimes miss the old, little nice things he first did for me, but that was so long ago.

We were married for almost 4 years this November. 6 months of the 4 years he was deployed. 4 months over that time he was gone for training, and then the one year, this past year we were separated by the entire country, minus those few days we saw each other over the year. Do I say we were together for 3 years and have already gone through my one year, and need the other?

Seriously though, why am I using this absurd count down to mark the time when I will be heeled? I guess because, I am feeling so lonesome and depressed lately. This is funny because for like the first month or two after the May Day, I was almost completely fine. People kept complementing me on my strength. Now, I still feel strong enough that I have not felt the urge to attempt to drag myself back to him or even talk to him. I don't know where there sadness has come from. I feel miserable.

I think that because I crave structure as that Type A, logical thinking, person that I am, I want to believe in the rule that Charlotte came up with. But am I cheating for counting this whole year that has gone by, or can I count it. I can't decide. I can only decide, that I am in a happier, supposedly physical (the east coast), but not yet mental place than I was a year ago, and that possibly in another 9 months, I will begin to feel better.

Afternoon Naps = Awake at 1:30am

2008-08-30T22:26:00.000-07:00

So after hanging with Coolleen this afternoon, I came home and took a two hour nap. Now, I am wide awake. Napping is awesome but sometimes leaves me in this state of awakeness. Or rather I'm awake because last night I was up until 3am.

Why do I do this to myself. Ohhh,...that's right, I'm still being self destructive. Oh well, at least I am honest with myself. But I feel like a freakin' college student. But it was a fun night.

Best thing about the broken finger is that I get to point my finger at everything. It's a great conversation starter. Or maybe I just feel like having an excuse to point at others and blame them. Worst thing about the broken finger is that it has taken like 10 minutes to write this little bit. Maybe I will get better at writing sans right index finger and become faster and faster.

Jumping Jacks = Broken Finger

2008-08-28T16:56:00.001-07:00

Apparently, when I try to alter my exercise routine by doing a workout from SELF magazine, what do I do?? I break my finger. That's right, I broke my finger doing jumping jacks.

Okay so following the routine, I first jogged on my treadmill for 10 minutes, then I was to skip rope for 30 seconds, which I kind of did. I don't have a rope, but I jumped up and down like I was jumping rope.

So, my dog, Syd thought we were playing or something as I "fake skipped rope". She was like next to me and almost jumping on me. So I backed up a bit. Of course, when it came time to do the jumping jacks part of the exercise routine, I brought my arms up and legs out, but...BAMMMM. I hit my right hand, more precisely my right index finger on the hanging-from-the-ceiling, Tiffany-like lamp. Ouch!!

Like a trooper, I finished the exercise course, which was to repeat the same set. I even then did some ab exercises and weights. But dammit, my finger hurt. I did manage to ice it and took some Tylenol. Only the next morning, this morning, more swelling and bruising. SEE PIC. Only I could have hurt myself doing jumping jacks!

Well, its taken like 10 minutes to type this...it's hard to type with the brace on my index finger.

Example Typing: qiuyydyuyyyyyyyyyuijghjkgdh

Oh Please!!!!!! (First Blog with Balls)

2008-08-26T19:44:00.000-07:00

I had to send a message to the wasband to request info for my secret clearance package at work. They needed to know things like, my step-son's name, my mother-in-law and father-in-law's address, nationality status, etc. Let's stop first and think how strange it is that after I have been married to him for almost 4 years, I do not know this information.

Anyhow, I thought I would ask him this info straight up since I know that he knows what secret clearance's are and the like. He has one, for God's sake. Well, he just wrote back this cryptic message that he would not release any information to me and that he would only give info to the DoD, unless he was sure that the release of the info would not be subject to foreign collection.

OH PLEASE!!!!

Like he has any assets that I could take anyhow. Besides, I am a freakin lawyer,...if I wanted to find out this info to take some kind of property that I was entitled, than I could find out. If I couldn't find out myself through free public record, then someone who I paid to investigate could find out this freakin info. What a complete dildo head!

I mean PLEASE!!

Old or Young again

2008-08-26T17:34:00.000-07:00

Since the wasband became the wasband, I have felt as if my life has changed in many ways. One such way is the need for spending excess time in those smoke-filled, bar stooled, drinking houses, watching everyone else getting hit on but you. Luckily this weekend, I got to experience such an experience for myself.

How exciting it is "getting" to be single again! I like the idea of getting to restart my life and find new things to do and meeting new people, but the whole, Bar/Dating scene, leaves something to be desired. All those reading this blog who have been recently married, or have "happy" marriages are all saying a "thank goodness I'm not there" under your breath. I know....I was you only a year or so ago.

But here I am, what do you do? As I wrote in one of my blogs last week, attempting to increase my self esteem is one of my main, Top Five, goals. I only hope that by increasing the self esteem, the thought of spending more weekends out among my fellow singles won't feel so daunting. This past weekend, after feeling incredibly fat, which reeked havoc on the self esteem (count them...two of my goals) and made me not want to be there the instant that I arrived.

So, again, what do you do....I played along because it was a very good friend's birthday, and I decided to drink myself happy. What do you know.....blueberry stoli vodka and diet coke, is the best drink ever!

Sick Days

2008-08-25T18:50:00.000-07:00

I called out of work this morning. I hate having to explain why I can't come in. But most importantly I hate doing just about anything but sleeping, bathing or movie watching on those days I am too ill to go to work. I am not sure that I want to even write this blog, but there....I have written something. Now back to bed I think. Good Night. I hope to feel better tomorrow.

Power Boost

2008-08-22T14:24:00.000-07:00

Can one really have too much caffeine? I know technically/physically you can, and it can be harmful for you, but doesn't the feeling of being highly motivated, although slightly shaky, just feel totally (toadly) incredible?

Truthfully,...last night I didn't get enough sleep at all because I kept thinking about the fact that I had to get up early to get the bagels for our Friday bagel club. That is the most incredibly dumb reason to not be able to sleep, but nonetheless, it is the truth.

So, hear I am with three Starbucks coffees under my belt and one diet soda. Its a bit difficult to concentrate at work now at 2:30, as you can imagine. At least I get to leave work early today. Yeah!! I love it when they shut down the servers and kick us out! It's like a snow day or something.

Only 6 more hours until Dark Knight in IMAX!

Ready, Set, GOAL!!!

2008-08-21T13:49:00.001-07:00

So when you are faced with re-thinking about your life, a common practice to help in moving on is to come up with new goals. When I was married, I had certain goals that obviously don't apply, now that I am single. So, I have been thinking a lot about my new goals, or at least my new goals for right now.

#1 This is my most important, "right now" goal - lose weight and get in shape. If you read yesterday's blog, then you have a clear picture of what started me down my path on unhealthiness. Try, not being able to walk very well or far for several months. But that was awhile ago now, and I have to suck it up and press forward. No more complaining! This means changing my physical activity level as well as eating pattern. We will see how this goes, but it is for now my #1 Goal.

#2 Go back to school - I love school. The pressure of studying for a test, the gobs of reading, the new people you make and be-friend. I didn't realize how much I loved it, until after I'd been out for awhile, but I guess, you never really know how much you miss something until it's gone. (Ha!)

#3 Pay off credit cards - Pretty much self explanatory goal. I know how I got into the CC mess and I know how to get out. Seriously though, I am not a crazy impulse buyer or anything, but you try visiting your family, while having to fly two of you all the way across the country. Holidays, summers, and weddings were VERY expensive and have caused my bills to pile.

#4 Save Money - like most women coming out of a divorce, I will be left in a worse position than I was while married. But, on the up side, I am in a better financial and mental health position than I was before I was married. Regardless, I am thankful, that I will not be left in that bad of a position. It could have been tons and tons worse.

#5 Learn to like myself - I have always had a problem with this one. I think that though, with Goals #1 & #2, along the way, I will improve on this goal.

Hmmmmm....I think five goals is a pretty good start for someone trying to reflect on their life. I guess I will keep a running tab. Odds are the goals will change anyhow. We'll see

Long Stories...that make me feel lucky

2008-08-20T16:41:00.000-07:00

Earlier today, I was speaking with someone about how I used to love the weather in San Diego. I always used to joke about how that was the one and only thing I liked there. While that is not entirely true, it was one of the best things about living there. The awesome weather allowed me to walk outside nearly every day and I even joined a half marathon training program to prepare for a 16 some odd mile hike. However, as I've told this story many times...my wish to complete the long race ended one morning with a swollen leg.

On an early Tuesday morning, I woke up with awful awful pain in my left leg. I thought maybe I had pulled a muscle or something. I had after all been training for the half marathon and had done a 5k (with the puppy) the week before. I decided to drag myself out of bed and head to the bathroom for a bath. When I got to the bathroom by crawling across the floor, and turned on the bright lights, I made it to the toilet just in time to puke. The leg was causing even more pain because I had made an attempt to move.

I thought at this point about starting the bath and continuing to heal the pain via the hot bath, but then I looked down and began examining my leg. My leg was swollen and purple looking. It reminded me of the crocodile hunter getting bitten by some kind of freakish bug, out in the bush, that caused massive discoloration and swelling. I had after all, been walking the trails throughout San Diego with my dog in preparation for my race. So, of course, I called my friend in med school, because that is what I do when I have any health, science, or medical-like issue.

All right, so I called my friend at like 7am, feeling a bit guilty about the early wake-up call, but I thought my leg was going to fall off, or an alien was going to be born out my knee. At this point, I was nearly hyperventilating because the pain was excruciating. I told her what the leg looked like and was ready to text her a pic, but fortunately, she had an idea of what was wrong. This I tell you is a direct quote, well as best as I can remember,..."Well, you know how you have been smoking and taking the birth control pill. The combo of those two things can cause blood clots, which it sounds like that is what it could be. But I don 't really know. That kind of thing is more clinical, which we don't cover until next year." Her next piece of advice, speaking from someone who has known me for over 10 years, was, "Don't wait, Janet. This is not something you wait for. Go to the doctor NOW. If you can't drive, call the ambulance."

Without any hope for a ride, with me in no position at all to drive, having puked a couple more times, I decided to make that call to 9-1-1. When you are younger and you first learn about the magical 911 number, you think how cool it would be to call. Many children actually call 911 after learning it just to see the police or cool fireman come to their house. However, when you are faced with actually having to call, and for yourself, because you are stuck at home alone, there is nothing to accurately explain how weird and uncomfortable it is.

So, I made the call, still hyperventilating after my friend's scary advice, explained that I think that I have a blood clot in my leg and that I needed an ambulance. They asked me my age, my address and quickly got off the phone. I thought this was odd, because on TV and such, they stay on the phone until the ambulance comes. I guess the operator did not want to hear my heavy, crazed breathing. Anyway, after I hung up and realized that I would have to get the door open and have someone come over to let the dog out, I decided to call my apartment neighbors who had recently had a baby. Of course I did not want to rely on them to shuffle me to the hospital because of the new baby and all, but I thought that the neighbor could help me with the dog and maybe help me get myself together and some socks on before the ambulance came.

She came over, despite the early hour, in like two seconds. I guess she heard the desperation in my voice. She helped me get into some clothes and get some socks on and not soon after we heard the ambulance down the street. The paramedics came in and started asking me lots of questions, and of course took off the socks I had put on to look at my foot and leg. They asked if I had been injured recently, or if I feared for my safety at home,like i dozen times. I had to say no.

They of course took me in their ambulance to the Naval Hospital in SD. Not a bad facility, but nothing like Bethesda Naval. On the way I was given morphine and later Valium. I was of course starting to feel nothing but fog. However, when I got to the hospital, there were more questions. This time, they still asked the "safety at home" question, but also asked the typical military treatment facility question of, "how would you describe your pain on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest?" I told the nurse, that I had not had a baby, so I would not say 10, but that I would go with a 9.

After the check in and more questions, which are considerably difficult to answer while heavily intoxicated. I was taken to get an ultrasound of the leg. Barely awake on the hospital, wheelie bed, the tech began using the machine and its cool jelly to examine my left leg. I somehow heard through the drug induced fog, "How old are you?" The tech said it again, and I answered. She left the room and got the doctor that reads the ultrasound (whatever they are called). But next thing I remember I was being checked into the hospital room.

Now, with a three doctor team, they asked more questions about whether I was sedentary, whether I had been on long plane trips, or on long car rides. The answer was, of course, No, I was training for a marathon, no and no. Well, it turned out that I had a massive deep vein thrombosis clot in my upper left thigh. The clot began about 5 inches above my knee and stretched to the top of my thigh, almost in the groin area. Apparently, having such a condition, where the individual is not sedentary, and without the long car or plane trips, is pretty rare, even with the birth control pills and smoking combo. After a barrage of blood tests they found the culprit.

It turns out that I have a genetic blood disorder/mutation called Factor Five Leiden. Apparently 20% of Caucasian persons in the world have one allele or are heterozygous factor five. I on the other hand have two alleles, from each parent or, I am homozygous factor five. Less than 1% of everyone in the world has the homozygous factor five mutation. I am apparently terribly lucky.

The truth of it all, the end of the story, is that I am actually very lucky. If I had not gone to the hospital in time I could have had other very bad complications. Often many people have a pulmonary embolism, where the clot breaks off and goes into the lungs. Or the clot could have broken off and gone to my heart or even my brain. I am very lucky that I received the fast advice of my unsure, but totally correct med school friend. Sometimes when I tell this story, as I often do, I forget how close I could have came to death. I am very lucky.

See link for more information in my favorite mutation condition that I like to pretend makes me like one of the Heroes from the TV show. I am supper clotting girl!:
http://www.fvleiden.org/

Bumper Sticker News Feeds

2008-08-19T13:40:00.000-07:00

While looking for, and thinking about what to write about today, I thought about re-reading through more old posts of my favorite bloggist, Stephanie Klein. She, like me had to come out of a relationship and learn to be on her own after being with a, not-so-nice to her, spouse. Ms. Klein, in fact is the author that coined, my new favorite word, "wasband". The not quite divorced, definitely over, but only separated, former spouse. I love her word, as I am sure many have heard me use before.

Stephanie has an awesome knack for writing and letting all of the feelings just open up. I however, am not quite to that point. Of course that is the purpose of this whole blog experience,...to keep writing how I feel and get it all out there no matter what. I've found that if I make myself write every day, it will be the only way I will continue on. I am sure, in fact I am almost positive, that I read in her early blogs, that she also kept up with her writing by not missing a single day (except for vaca). I have to hope it will work for me and help me to heal.

I have been wondering when the right time would be to open up about what happened with my relationship with the wasband...but I don't know when. I had been waiting for the lease of the house that I am renting to expire. However, recently while I was on vacation, the wasband removed me from his list of friends on myspace. I guess this opens the door for me being able to write whatever I want without worrying about him not helping to pay the rent for the rented house I can't afford on my own. But I am still not sure I am at the point where the wasband healing should become my word vomit on this electronic page. Soon, I will have to face the blank page and begin telling my story to help me process the pain of losing the former dreams and ideas I thought would make up the rest of my life. I guess writing about beginning to write about it is better than nothing,...for now.

I have however been able to make one beginning or change, other than this blog, which outwardly shows my change in status. On the facebook today, I changed my status to single. Facebook, has this wondrous idea to broadcast users, daily use of their product and when you change your status, it announces to all your friends that you are now single. They even add a little broken heart icon, right before the "news feed". Of course the new announcement shined brightly for everyone to see when I changed my status. A single friend of mine, also with a wasband, congratulated me and said that I should feel liberated, while another old high-school friend wrote to ask what was going on. I am not sure how I feel about it. To add to the facebook, news feed frenzy, I also saw that my wasband had created his own new facebook page, which of course I am not invited to view, as I am not his facebook, or myspace, or real world friend.

Best thing about changing my profile however, was the new bumper sticker proudly sent to my facebook profile from Meghan. The bumper sticker app of facebook never lets me down.